1. Please take 30 seconds to register your free account to remove most ads, post topics, make friends, earn reward points at our store, and more!  
    TalkBass.com has been uniting the low end since 1998.  Join us! :)

I had hoped not to post about a breakup

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by Koushaku, Sep 4, 2005.

  1. Koushaku

    Koushaku The artist never sleeps, only dreams

    Mar 10, 2005
    Albany, NY
    ...but alas, I fear the time is coming, and it's stupid too...

    Our vocalist went out with one of our guitarist's ex-girlfriends from a year ago. Now the guitarist wants to fire the vocalist, even though we just replaced a drummer who had quit.

    Anyway, I blocked the move. I don't want to deal with too much turnover at once, especially when it would mean rebuilding both the rhythm section and writing new lyrics/vocals. Now it's caused a power struggle between this guitarist and me, and I'm in the unfortunate position of everyone else in the band backing me (that's bad, because it means that my actions determine whether or not we keep the vocalist, or keep the guitarist, or break up the band).

    We've been playing together for over a year and a half, and I've played with the two guitarists in the band for a year before that. I've stuck with them, even though the music is somewhat in the vein of emo (which I don't care for) cause they showed promise. They wrote some nice acoustic material and the two guitars allowed me room to vary from the rhythm. Frankly, I don't know of much else nearby that I would enjoy playing with as much.

    Anyway, been thinking about maybe posting on some community boards or some classifieds as a bassist available for some softer music...I won't go the metal/emo route again, the people have attitudes that are too unprofessional. Still, I'm not quite letting go of the hope that the two guys will get over the stupid girl...

    I think we meet today, I hope what I do doesn't cause everything to fall apart. It's not even my fault it's happening, aside from sticking up for the vocalist who didn't even know he was doing anything wrong. I think, aside from stealing a girl he was actually with at the time, which would be pretty crude behavior, the reason for firing someone from a band should be a little more...I don't know...concrete and impersonal (aside from creative differences, which we never really had before).

    I'll keep y'all posted if you care. :(
  2. JimmyM


    Apr 11, 2005
    Apopka, FL
    Endorsing: Ampeg Amps, EMG Pickups
    Your guitarist is being a baby. But that's beside the point now because it happened and there ain't no putting the genie back in the bottle. I think you are the voice of reason. Try to keep things happening as much as possible, but unless the vocalist splits up with her, I can see that you guys will eventually have to make a choice. Quite frankly, I'd go with the vocalist.
  3. +1 baby guitarist....
    Good luck and hope it will finished fine for you...
  4. bassmonkeee


    Sep 13, 2000
    Decatur, GA
    I'm with Jimmy. If the vocalist started going out with the guitarist's current girlfriend, I might understand. Hell--if I were you, I'd just tell the guitar player to read up on Fleetwood Mac's incestuous history, and shut up. :D

    I'd also remind him that it's easier to replace a good guitar player than it is to replace a good vocalist...

    As for your hope
    You're going to find unprofessional, messed up folk in any genre you get into. Period. Sad, but true.

    Good luck!
  5. Ryan L.

    Ryan L. Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Aug 7, 2000
    West Fargo, ND

    +1. Especially on the part of there being unprofessional people in any genre.

    And tell your guitarist to grow up. Good grief. :rolleyes:
  6. Selta


    Feb 6, 2002
    Pacific Northwet
    Total fanboi of: Fractal Audio, AudiKinesis Cabs, Dingwall basses
    That's really, really sad. Hope it all works out.

  7. Munjibunga

    Munjibunga Total Hyper-Elite Member Gold Supporting Member

    May 6, 2000
    San Diego (when not at Groom Lake)
    Independent Contractor to Bass San Diego
    OK, look. Two words for the guitarist: "Grow up." Now you tell him that, and tell him it comes from Munjibunga. And tell him to wise up while he's at it. Then kick his sorry ass, too.
  8. Koushaku

    Koushaku The artist never sleeps, only dreams

    Mar 10, 2005
    Albany, NY
    It's almost time to go to practice...but I already told him to grow up and that his behavior is reminiscent of junior high...he wasn't even going to talk to the vocalist, I at least convinced him he needed to communicate about the music, but we all need to be on amiable terms with each other. I'm not subscribing to some chaos theory. Some bands wrote good music while at each other's throats, but they usually fall apart.

    I'm afraid it might even get physical, my guitarist used to wrestle in school, and last summer he actually did sort of get into a fight with our vocalist (he pinned the vox down for 15 minutes in teh driveway next to my house, but our vox got him back by slowly putting an increasing number of dents in his car every other practice :D ). It's a good thing we all drive crappy vehicles. I didn't think they'd get this bad though, things we're going good.

    Anyway, yeah, I hear what you all are saying. Hopefully I'll figure this out, or maybe I'll leave to join two bands that had previously asked me to join, though I'd rather stick with this for now.

    Thanks all.
  9. JimmyM


    Apr 11, 2005
    Apopka, FL
    Endorsing: Ampeg Amps, EMG Pickups
    Oh, so this has been brewing even before this, huh? I can see a change on the horizon being necessary. Start looking now.
  10. Koushaku

    Koushaku The artist never sleeps, only dreams

    Mar 10, 2005
    Albany, NY
    :rolleyes: So we're uneasily, and maybe only temporarily, continuing as we were. Apparently the vocalist doesn't even like her that much, so maybe it'll return to normal after he breaks up with her...as it is I already put out a small ad online and one person responded, it could be worth trying out.

    Bands are crazy, I'm beginning to wonder if I should stick to playing everything myself.