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I need to quit a band...in a really bad moment

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by javi_bassist, Nov 15, 2019.


  1. Hello guys,

    I am here looking for some advice from you. I need to quit the band but I don't know how to do it without creating a problem to the band. Let me explain.

    I joined this band two months ago. It was only the singer and the manager. We were a full band pretty quickly with two more guys. In two weeks we are going to the studio to record two singles. Next month they wanted to play a show and make a photo session etc etc. Things are going pretty quickly.

    However, I am not motivated. The music is fine but not my thing. And I am having some financial problems and I cannot afford paying the rehearsal space anymore. I tried to talk to them so that we work more at home (which is how I usually work) but they don't want to. And I cannot pay the photos, the venues, the record... (The singles are already paid). Besides, I don't really like how things are managed since the singer and the manager take all the decisions and then they "ask" us (which is irrelevant because the decision has been already taken).

    To sum up, I want to leave the band. However, with all the recordings coming, it's not easy. The first solution I think about is telling them that I want to leave but that I will record the singles and I will be in the band until they find someone else. What do you guys think?
     
  2. Quit now. Immediately. Before it goes any further. To continue is bad for you AND them.
     
  3. ArtechnikA

    ArtechnikA I endorsed a check once... Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 24, 2013
    SEPA
    Is there any money coming in?
    Where is it going?
    Who is paying this 'manager' ?
    What is the business model for future income?

    I believe I'd say something like "This isn't what I signed up for; bye."
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2019
    Butch Bobcat, SteveC, Mr_Moo and 7 others like this.
  4. bolophonic

    bolophonic

    Dec 10, 2009
    Durham, NC
    How much dough do you personally have wrapped up in this thing at this point?
     
    Mr_Moo, iunno, 51PRI and 1 other person like this.
  5. ScottsTheLimit

    ScottsTheLimit SUSPENDED

    Sep 3, 2018
    You could always do what vocalist Dan Nelson did that got him kicked out of Anthrax when he took a dump on their bassist Frank Bello.

    That always works.
     
  6. getbent

    getbent

    Aug 20, 2010
    Chicago, IL
    Something I keep in mind for situations like this is: who's band is it? Are you contributing to the writing and direction?

    If it's someone else's vision and songs, and I'm just the bass player, then the BL can pay for the rehearsal space and recording, and pay me for the gigs.

    I used to back up a singer/songwriter. It was her name on the marquee and album cover, I didn't play on all of the tracks on the album. I don't remember much in the way of money, but she paid for the rehearsal space and recordings, and brought the beer to practice. Cool with me.

    After that, I backed up another singer/songwriter who wrote all the music and called all the shots, used his name for the band name, but expected the musicians to contribute for the rehearsal space and beer. Any gig money went to the show posters (which were silkscreened by the drummer, hmmmm). I noped out of that pretty quick.
     
    petrus61, RevGroove, Mr_Moo and 17 others like this.
  7. DWBass

    DWBass The Funkfather Supporting Member

    Let them know everything you just said here. Not into the music. Financially, you cannot contribute. Let them figure out finding a new bass player.

    Me personally, I'm am in no way, paying for a rehearsal space/studio.
     
    SteveC, Mr_Moo, retslock and 13 others like this.
  8. FrenchBassQC

    FrenchBassQC Supporting Member

    Jul 13, 2011
    Gatineau QC CA
    Leave now so they can find a replacement ASAP.
     
    Mr_Moo, retslock, smogg and 3 others like this.
  9. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    Yeah leave now. Just tell them everything you told us.

    They could come back with an alternative third option. Who knows?
     
    Mr_Moo, 63Danno, smogg and 5 others like this.
  10. Keger Jupit

    Keger Jupit Banned SUSPENDED

    May 10, 2018
    The Great PNW!!
    I didn't read much past this sentence. You, take care of you; that's one of the most important things in life. Don't worry about the music situation, they can find another bassist.
     
    petrus61, SteveC, Mr_Moo and 23 others like this.
  11. JRA

    JRA my words = opinion Supporting Member

    0000.jpg
    tell them:
    - you want to leave the band
    - you will record the singles
    - you will stay until they find someone else

    pretty straight forward. good job! good luck! :thumbsup:
     
    EatS1stBassist, Kmonk, Engle and 4 others like this.
  12. el murdoque

    el murdoque

    Mar 10, 2013
    Germany
    When you have financial issues and this band costs you money, just tell them that there can be no more contributions from your side. My guess is, they'll kick you out.
     
    Mr_Moo, Miles_ONeal, gozbass and 13 others like this.
  13. five7

    five7 Supporting Member

    Dec 5, 2009
    Denver
    I quit my band on Saturday. Called each one individually and told them I was done. They were getting to record, guitarist can play bass on it. No shows at the moment as they wanted time off so they have time to find a bass player.
    Quit if you want to, sounds like sooner the better.
     
  14. oldrocker

    oldrocker

    Feb 13, 2005
    Long Island, NY
    If it was me I would tell them that it's nothing against any of them but that due to personal reasons you are leaving the band. I would also tell them that you will honor the commitment to record the singles if they like, but beyond that you are gone.

    I would not leave it open ended by agreeing to stay until they find someone else.

    Any problems created are all theirs, not yours - Good Luck.
     
  15. goodbye.
     
  16. gln1955

    gln1955 Supporting Member

    Aug 25, 2014
    Ohio, USA
    They are making all the decisions, so you are not a co-equal member, yet you are paying a share of all the expenses. That should be a no-go right there. The fact that you don't care for the music is just a kicker.
     
  17. PaulCISSA

    PaulCISSA Supporting Member

    Jul 10, 2014
    Northest New Jersey
    Sooner is better. Concern for their circumstances before your own is self defeating. It’s OK to be a virtuous person but don’t let that get in the way of taking care of yourself first. Lots of good advice here already - that’s all I got.
     
  18. LBS-bass

    LBS-bass Supporting Member

    Nov 22, 2017
    California
    The sooner you quit, the less entangled in this you will be. I'd quit before it gets any more complicated.
     
    Mr_Moo, Mike Whitfield, iunno and 9 others like this.
  19. lat

    lat

    Dec 30, 2014
    Lower Basstonia
    Why would you pay money that you can't afford to a band that you are going to leave right away?
    Sounds like you didn't agree to paying for photos, studio time, etc. They decided that you would.

    Tell them you can't afford to pay into this band and leave.

    my 2 cents...
     
    Mr_Moo, Mike Whitfield, iunno and 2 others like this.
  20. tradernick

    tradernick Supporting Member

    Mar 19, 2008
    That would be a big mistake. You've already said you don't like how the band is being run. And you can't afford the costs. You know you don't want to continue. You aren't helping them by hanging around when you really don't want to be there. That type of decision usually ends in bad feelings.

    There's only one path for you. Quit now.
     
    Mr_Moo, Miles_ONeal, iunno and 4 others like this.

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