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I Quit the Band, any thoughts guys and gals

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by Trouland, Sep 9, 2008.

  1. Hi all,
    Sorry if this is long but here goes. Iv'e been playing with this band Hollow Face for a while now and we have grown and gotten a pretty large following. I told them I have to quit on Monday. The musicians are really good and I enjoyed playing with them. My reasons for quiting are twofold. Number one with the giging schedule getting quite filled up it was taking to much time from my family and with new job responsibilities at work I would be spreading myself too thin. The other reason is the act has been changing to rely more on shenanigans and gimics, not music, and my wife and I don't think its to cool. You can see pics of last Sats gig here http://www.myspace.com/hollowfaceband there was about 450 to 500 people there. The lead singer and the promoters had scantly clad women dancing in cages on either side of the stage. I talked to people in the audience after the show and some liked it and others didn't, it was about a 50/50 split. I personally thought is was kind of sleasy:rollno:. It didn't feel like me or what I think performing music is about. I think I made the right decision. I don't feel sad about it at all, just relieved. Now I can concentrate on all the new crap at work and spend more time with my wife. I just wanted to see what some of you guys and gals here think about my situation. I will still keep on playing bass in my home studio just to keep my chops up, you never know what the future will bring!
  2. purfektstranger


    Apr 10, 2003
    If you are happy with your decision then you made the right move.
  3. Thunderthumbs73


    May 5, 2008
    The family and the new job should come first, if as it demands, and I think it does. And to put the icing on the cake, it doesn't feel right to you, via the shenanigans and gimmics. I think you have your own slam-dunk case/rationale for not doing it. Other bands will come along.
  4. jomahu


    Dec 15, 2004
    Bos, MA
    family and work first??? objecting to women in cages????

    what kind of crazy talk is that???

    joking. good call on your part.
  5. magickbass

    magickbass Guest

    May 24, 2008
    Personally, I think when bands have to rely on gimmicks to gain an audience it is better to quit.
  6. jhfishn

    jhfishn Supporting Member

    Apr 22, 2004
    Mays Landing, NJ
    Well .......... my hat's off to you my friend. That action shows you have integrity and a standard to live by and in my opinion sometimes that gets lost in the name of "entertainment".

    For those of us with a Spiritual bent ..... God closes one door and opens another ...... I think a new door may be on it's way so don't look back. Obviously your eyes are on the true prize. :)
  7. Ya, next thing you know you'll be playing for some contrived made up artist like Spears.
  8. chroma601


    Feb 16, 2007
    Sylva, NC
    Sometimes playing for fun trumps playing for money. You have a job and family, enjoy them, and when you are ready seek out some other postprofessional musicians for a Tuesday Night Music Club kind of informal jam, and let it go from there. Craigslist and The Mode are good tools to help you get back to the groove when you are ready, and on your own terms.
  9. jgroh

    jgroh Supporting Member

    Sep 14, 2007
    When the feeling you have after you quit is "relieved", then you know you made the right decision.
  10. VisualShock


    Feb 19, 2008
    North Wales
    family first. always.
  11. Finsterino


    Mar 8, 2007
    Maybe I am too old, but I am sick and tired of visual gimmicks and stimulus and distractions while trying to watch a band. What happened to just playing your heart out while focusing on making good music, as opposed to a visual "experience"?

    And you did the right thing - family comes first.
  12. One word - KISS. And you can probably apply that to either side of your statement. :)

    I grew up in the Alice Cooper/KISS era where big theatrical shows were the way to go. It seems like grunge killed the theatrical aspect of the big rock show. I love when club bands try to do something other than just show up and play. When I go to see bands I want to be entertained. Some friends of mine saw Seether a month or so ago and left before the end of the show. They said the band just stood and played; no entertainment at all. They said they might as well have listened to a CD. Yes the music should come first but with the cost of concert tickets nowadays I better get entertained. And I don't mean GWAR entertained lol

    You have made the right decision for yourself so that's all that matters. The girls might a been a little much.
  13. Regarding gimmicks; I can take 'em or leave 'em. Some bands really make them work and it adds to the overall enjoyment of the show while others use them in hopes of supplementing and otherwise lackluster offering. The former is cool - the latter, not so much.

    Regarding your decision; As long as you didn't leave them hanging and everyone is OK with the move - meaning you didn't just spring it on 'em Monday and walk - then all the rest of the reasons moot. Work, family, not feeling that the band's direction aligns with your comfort zone - all reasons to consider moving on - but when it comes right down to it - it's HOW you move on that matters, not necessarily the fact that they want cage dancers and you don't dig 'em.

    Hell - you may LOVE the band and have no "valid" reason to want to quit other than a whim you wanted to follow. As long as you make your separation from the group professionally, then you did the right thing.
  14. Thanks for all the input guys. I left on good terms with all the guys and they understand. I gave them a heads up on my job situation a couple of weeks ago. Like I said they are all really great guys and really good musicians. I am helping the new bassist learn their songs and get comfortable with the materiel. I think the new guy will work out fine for them. Again, thanks for the input all! I was also thinking of going back to some simple jazz gigs at small venues. That would feel better for me right now instead of the big venues with all the elaborate production.
  15. Sounds like you handled it in a very positive and productive fashion. You made the right choice and did it in a way that kept the bridges intact.

    Good for you! Having the wisdom and professionalism to not only keep yourself from burning out and becoming no good to anyone, but to also be able to go back when your situation warrants is a sure sign of a pro! The world needs more pros!
  16. alembicguy

    alembicguy I operate the worlds largest heavey equipment Supporting Member

    Jan 28, 2007
    Congrats on having a sound mind to make that decision I would have done the same!
  17. Adam Bomb

    Adam Bomb

    Mar 26, 2008
    Bezerkely, CA
    This is my first and primary +1.

    Agreed re the cages. Girls not in cages work just fine.

    I have another word too: Zombie. Three feet from the stage with fire and robots and go-go girls and motorcycles and horror movies, *and* some of my favorite songs being totally shredded right in front of me, I did not feel cheated or under-entertained in any way. If Zombie had also been eating chocolate it would have been all my favorite things up on a stage right in front of me, on fire. On the other hand, my favorite band, King's X, just stands there and melts my face without the aid of pyrotechnics. So.

    And, um, I have some bad news for you: You guys effing RAWKED. I have already listened to enough of that genre to last me a lifetime, but, for what it is, IMO it is top shelf. I'm just saying. In your new band, don't be all like "My old band effing rawked." It did, but that's not polite.

    (J/k. You are a monster, and your next band will rawk too :cool: )

    --Bomb :bassist:
  18. Spinal Tapper

    Spinal Tapper

    Nov 15, 2007
    I think you did what was right in your heart.

    Playing devil's advocate (and to keep it interesting), I'd like to ask...did you guys bring the cages, or were they already there? Did you bring the girls for the cages, or did they get in the cages themselves? Did you/the promoters pay the girls to get in the cages??

    The way I see it, if my band played a show and there were empty cages on the side of the stage when we were loading in, the first thing I'd think is: I wonder if girls are going to climb up in there during our set. Then, if they did in fact climb up there on their own will during our performance, I'd be pretty happy about it. My girlfriend may get jealous, but you seem like a band that really wants to go places/get signed/tour, etc, where jealous girlfriends/wives are a common thing...

    I have to admit, I'd feel very flattered that there were that many people there, and people are getting excited about our music, even if they're sluts in cages.

    Now, that's just my $.02, but I'm also only 26, not married, and as they say: young, dumb, and full of c**

    But it sounds like you made the right choice and hopefully your band can move on as well in forward progress. Family should definitely come first, just make sure you make time for yourself and the bass!

    Thanks for hearing me out :)
  19. DudeistMonk


    Apr 13, 2008
    Newark, NJ
    I'm not one for women in cages or explosions and crap but some bands can pull this stuff off.

    I saw a band in Philly who always have belly dancers but they play Arabian fusion and it works out great and comes across really classy.

    and on another scale, Pink Floyd's giant flying pigs are a staple of their shows and I think they are pretty cool. All your psychedelic band with their light shows and i-tunes visualizer esq. back drops are pretty cool too.
  20. waynobass


    Feb 27, 2008
    False. Women will let you down. Even (especially?) wives. Music will never fail you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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