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I quit.

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous [BG]' started by BehindTheMoon, Aug 16, 2002.

  1. I never thought I'd be saying this, but I'm done with playing music.

    There is little pleasure in holding an instrument anymore. I despise the sounds I make. I'm sick of picking up my bass or guitar and feeling hopeless, and in five long years I have yet to create a single lasting musical thing which I would feel proud to call my own.

    I don't think I'm going to be very happy with this. A big part of my self-image is bound up with music, and letting go of that isn't going to be easy. But however I feel viscerally, I have no interest in perpetuating the ritual sham which music has become for me, and which has given me so little.

    Looking back on my five years of effort, I feel...stupid. Really, really stupid, as in I should have figured this all out a long time ago. Obviously I haven't been very honest with myself about a lot of things - I've let a bunch of ideas about who I thought I was influence me too much, and paid the price.

    For everyone out there who truly loves making music, as opposed to those like me who tell themselves they should, good luck. Enjoy your gift.
  2. i have felt the same way. i got sick of playing bass cause i was sick of playing what i was playing,like i was sick of what i sounded like.i never new if what i was comming up with was any good and it trouble me.then i started looking at music the same way as i do art. no matter what the same peacie of art or music sucks or is the greatist thing every. art and music is good when the creater thinks it good. when i stoped careing what othere pople thought i became more creative and stuff. hope u dont give up music.
  3. CS


    Dec 11, 1999
    Having read this slowly at least 4 times....Amen Ben.
  4. punkfunkfreak


    Dec 16, 2001
    you cant give up music, simple as that.

    youll last a week.

    after that youll be pining in a corner twiddling thumbs and talking jibberrish.

  5. SuperDuck


    Sep 26, 2000
    I've been playing for five years, and believe me, we're both still very much beginners. Look at some of the other members on this board who have been playing for longer than I have been alive... and THEY'RE still learning, too. As a musician, you can't expect to be a bass wunderkind after a few years. And if you're unhappy with the progress you are making, YOU can change that. That's the beautiful part! Get a teacher! Buy a book! Pick a random, difficult song and make it your new life goal to learn it!

    That's probably little consolation, but I wouldn't sell your gear just yet. You sound burnt out and frustrated, so what say you put the bass in the closet for a month, and see how you feel then.

    Maybe you're just fed up with your current band situation. Lord knows I've played with bands that make me want to throw my bass out of a moving truck.
  6. dsmith


    Mar 29, 2001
    Mt. Vernon, KY
    I stared playing when I was 13, and formed my first band when I was 15. We did the garage band thing till I was 19, and I guess you could say by that time we were getting tired of each other. I gave up music at age 20, and thought I would never look back. I think I felt as you do in some ways, but not being able to get out and play with other musicians also had something to do with it. I sold everything I owned, and for 7 years I didn't play bass, didn't buy any new CD's, practically didn't even listen to music. At the same time, deep down inside I was beating myself up for quitting, and missed playing and making music in a very bad way :( . About 3 or 4 years ago, I finally purchased a new bass and new amp, and found myself looking for a gig in less than 2 weeks. Guess what I am getting at is don't sell your equipment!! Being a bass player, or musician in general is something I feel you are born with, and not something you can simply give up. Selling your equipment will just make it harder on you in the long run. You have to get away from it every now and then, but if its meant to be there you can never fully give it up.

    Geez I sound like a grandparent or something :D .
  7. Jerry, Jr.

    Jerry, Jr.

    Jun 7, 2002
    Boston, MA
    dsmith, man a lot of what you said is similar to my experiences. I, too, began playing at age 13 and played in a few bands until I was around 18 or 19. Then I kind of burned out. I gave up playing, sold my bass, etc. for several years. When I was 23 an old guitarist friend re-entered my life and asked me to form a band with him. Suddenly, I was inspired again. I bought a new bass, amp, etc. After a few months that fell apart (he slept with my now-ex fiance) but, that's another story. A few months later, a couple more old friends asked me to join their band. I played with them from '96 until '99. It was cool. We played a lot of gigs, got some press, made a CD.

    After that band broke-up I again felt like I was done with music. I was now 26, buying a house, getting married, etc.

    Last December, at my 10 year high school reunion, I got to talking with a drummer that I had played in a band with in H.S. He tells me his band is looking for a new bassist, would I be interested? I jumped right back into it and now I am enjoying playing music more than I ever have!

    The point is that music gets in your blood. When you truly love it, you can't ever fully walk away from it. So, my advice to BehindTheMoon would be to take a little break but, don't give up on playing. You might just be burned out or uninspired right now. But, it'll come back, man. It always does!
  8. I have been playing for 27 years...I cannot imagine life without music. I just cant.
  9. Mike N

    Mike N Missing the old TB Staff Member Supporting Member

    Jan 28, 2001
    Spencerport, New York
    Imo you need a change of scenery. Maybe find some different people to jam with, or if youre not in a band, find one. Or maybe try learning a different style of music?
  10. but obviously some people can. i feel awful for BehindTheMoon. it's really sad when something you think you loved turns out to be something else. but i think i'm gonna have advice that's pretty contrary to everyone else's so far. if you really feel that deeply that music is depressing you so much, getting you down, and that it's really not for you, then maybe you're right. it takes a lot of self-realization to realize something like that, that something you loved a lot is really not for you. some people never even muster up nearly that much self-realization in many things: relationships, hobbies, careers, etc. BehindTheMoon never cursed everyone who plays music and claimed that music cannot work for anyone, rather he/she did the exact opposite. i think this really reveals that music may not be right for them. yes, it's very sad, but maybe taking a break or dropping it completely will be good.

    the only advice i can give is to at least partially echo what dsmith said. at the very least, don't sell your equiptment! you already bought it, it's already done the all the finacial damage it can, so it wont do any more damage by at the least just sitting around. you never know when you may become inspired again or get bitten by the music bug. if you're truly convinced that music is not for you for now, then go with that instinct and take a break whether that break is temporary or permanent. but at least leave yourself an option in the case that break is only temporary...

  11. I agree with Joel -

    Take a break, and think about what you feel like doing ... and be honest with yourself! And DO NOT sell you stuff!! The return you get will not be worth it!

    I for one LOVE playing music, and don't ever plan on stopping. But perhaps I can relate to the way you feel. I was a highly competitive athlete for a long time. I race bicycles, ran, and did triathlons for about 13 years all over the country - and pretty hardcore about it! When I finally said enough I realized that I never really LOVED it, and was much happier NOT living that life! I still love exercize(probably more than most), but the whole competitive thing is NOT for me at all.

    So, give it a break, and decide on your own as to how happy you are. It takes a lot of courage and commitment to choose either way. Just make sure you are happy - that should be the goal in everyones life.

    Good luck -
  12. Exactly.

    That's why I'm quitting.

    I'm looking forward to tomorrow and the feeling of not having unmet expectations of myself.
  13. Moon, I have to agree with you. If you think every note you play sounds like crap then most likely it does. Not only to you but also to the people that hear it. If the notes you play don't come from your soul then they must be coming from some other part of your anatomy and they probably do stink. Spend your time and effort on something you really like doing. You will be much happier. I'm sure this is not the reply you were looking for but sometimes the truth hurts.
  14. DON'T QUIT, or at least, don't sell your gear yet. Just put your stuff away for a few weeks, months, or however long you want. You might end up just wanting to play again. You may be inspired by some event in your life that makes you begin to write songs out the wazoo, and songs you like, too!

    I did this for a while. I just let my gear sit around for about a week, cause I got tired of playing. But after a while, I just had a sudden urge to play again, and I felt whole again.
  15. ARA punk

    ARA punk

    Jul 11, 2001
    USA, Shelby, NC
    yeah, it does sound like an echo in here. I havent been playing very long, but I've watched enough of other people playing, and I really believe that music is something you have to be doing for yourself, not for others. It has to be something you can devot 110% to and enjoy every moment of it.

    To some people, sports are life. To most of us, music is life. You get injured enough in sports you quit.... I suppose the same is true w/ music. I cannot imagine living w/ out touching a guitar, bass, or drum set for prolonged periods of time, or listening to cds. But I wouldn't be able to devot myself to sports, so its all in perspective...

    gosh, you can tell i'm no too great in english huh?
  16. john turner

    john turner You don't want to do that. Trust me. Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2000
    atlanta ga
    dude, lighten up on yourself and take a break for a while. it's not this bad, and i'm sure you're not either.

    the issue here isn't your musical skill, nor is it the music you're playing, it's your unreasonable expectations. _they_ are what you need to give up - don't through the baby out with the bath water.

    good luck with it.
  17. Gabu


    Jan 2, 2001
    Lake Elsinore, CA
    That's a good idea. It's not cool when what you like (or used to like) becomes a job instead of a pleasure.

    After some time off you might decide to take another swing at it, or you might not. In either case, there is no point in doing something that you don't enjoy. Good luck man.


    I forgot to add something. The main idea here is that you should not make this decision while you are upset. Make your choice after you have had your break and are able to think it through.
  18. pkr2


    Apr 28, 2000
    coastal N.C.
    "A bass. A tiny, trebly, awful, one channel, dirty, old, malfunctioning, noisy, amp."

    Above is your description of your rig as taken from your profile.

    If you have been playing for five years and your equiptment is still at this level, you probably aren't all that dedicated.

    If I had been listening to the amp that you describe I would have went nuts in the first few months.

    If you couldn't improve on the amp, you could have at least bought a set of headphones and a headphone amp for pretty cheap.

    My suggestion is to get rid of the amp that you have. When/if the urge hits you to play again, buy a used Peavey combo for less than $200.00 and find out what you really sound like.

    Good luck with whatever direction you take.

  19. frankencow150

    frankencow150 Guest

    Oct 17, 2001
    I'm not trying to tell this guy to give up,but...

    When he sounds this convinced that he doesnt wanna play music anymore,hes probably right. He knows what hes going through and none of us do. We cant say "stop playing for awhile" and expect this guy to love his bass after a few weeks of not playing. If it feels right to stop, then stop. You dont have to keep playing just because youve been playing for 5 years. Just make the right decision. Dont worry about any people bugging you if you stop, do whatever feels right for you. Good luck on whatever you decide.
  20. PollyBass

    PollyBass ******

    Jun 25, 2001
    Shreveport, LA
    Growing up in a musical house hold, i took some things for granted, when i was olderish, i was told by my dad that there ARE peple who just DONT like music... and i stared at a wall for at least two hours, i was 5, and i still remember him saying that. that just left me dumbfounded. I didnt belive it at first. i couldnt belive that there are people that don't like music. at the time, i thought that they must be pretty soulless people. Music does run in the family, but dang, music is my life, listening to it, playing it, i BREATH it. i have to. without it, i would die, or already be dead. I'm getting to a point.... the thing is, there is room for music in everyone's life, yours even, your just dishearted. try to look at music as a whole diffrently, change your approch. Listen to diffrent music. Listen to music diffrently. i have a feeling that if you quit, you would be back in a day. music is everywere, Even in you. try to let it out, don't think "What cool riff to write?" just sit there. look at your insturment, think of nothing. just look. then play what you feel, try to find the notes, dig deep. Don't let go.

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