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Is there anyone that you refuse to play with, no matter how good/talented they may be

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by glocke1, Jun 28, 2012.

  1. glocke1


    Apr 30, 2002
    Anyone that you just simply refuse to play music with, no matter how talented they are ?

    For me there is this one guy...Talented KB player and singer, with very good connections that go pretty far up the jam band scene on the national level...Problem is, the guy is a total and complete douche. I really don't want to get into the reasons why, I'll just say he is the largest douchebag Ive ever met, and there are many people other than me that share that sentiment.

    Unfortunately I have such a negative opinion of this guy I cannot even bring myself to share the same stage with him..He was invited to sit in with a band I was playing with recently by that bands KB player and I made it clear that there is simply no way that I would be able to play music with him.

    I know it seems petty and probably mental, but there is something that just brings out some pretty negative vibes from me about this person.
  2. The people you choose to play with are much more important then the music. If it's not going be a great group of people to hang with then forget it. Life is too short to hang with douche bags no matter how well they can shred on the guitar. I once played with a douche that many years later became a registered sex offender. Another guitarist has been bugging me to jam but he's got a shady past including prison and gang involvements. No Thanks.....Choose wisely.....lots of great people out there to jam with.
  3. I played a few gigs with a guitar/singer that went fine even though I knew he was"squirrely" I know he smokes weed but what else I don't know.
    Last summer we did a casino gig that went fine as usual til the pack out. He finished just before me and I had him parked in, in a small driveway. He came and said go move your car so I can go. I said just one second I just have this last load and I'll go. He just goes berserk on my screaming at me to move the car. Myself the bartenders and 1 or 2 patrons just stared at him as he went "ape s**t crazy on me" His face was red as a beet as he raged on. As I moved ther car he drooped the clutch and burned rubber around the corner and out of site. This was half a block from a Police station and I wished one was there at the time. He also had the chick singer in the car and I was worried for her life. I don't know if he's Bi-Polar or what, never seen him do anything like this before. I think if he had a gun he might have shot me , seriously. OUT OF HIS MIND! I called the singer when I got home to make sure she made it home all right, she did, apologised to me for his behaviour. It's her band and she's the leader. I told I will never work with him again EVAR! Life's to short for this BS. I haven't been called to work with her since so I guess he's in the band on a regular basis. I used to work with her quite a bit. I miss the work but not the BS.

    peace Kirk
  4. I've only met two people that I would never play with again.

    One was a keyboard player/ guitar player. Total weasel. Ripped off our band and put us into debt with our booking agency.

    The other was a guitarist. Drunk. Always. Not only frustrating from a professional standpoint, but most clubs in my area won't book any band that he's in.

    Life's too short, and I'm old enough that I just don't surround myself with douchebags.
  5. guy n. cognito

    guy n. cognito Secret Agent Member Gold Supporting Member

    Dec 28, 2005
    Nashville, TN
    I recently played with a talented guitarist that was batpoopie crazy. I think he did a little too much acid in the 80's. Huge ego, constant volume problems, and he made demands that were completely outrageous. He found his way into my "life's too short" list.
  6. elshunko


    Jun 25, 2010
    I've always taken some advise from a friend when he said "The people you play with says something about you". It's not a hard rule but I think it makes some sense.

    I don't "Refuse" to play with anyone; I chose to play with people who I like playing with and enjoy their company (As much a possible at least).
  7. Play with? Nah, I'd play with anyone again, at a gig or a for a session.

    Be in a band with? A ton. A metric ton.
  8. jive1

    jive1 Commercial User

    Jan 16, 2003
    Owner/Retailer: Jive Sound
    I know some great people that I would never want to be in a band with. As far as sitting in on a couple tunes, not really anyone on the top of my head. I've had some real doozies as far people sitting in, however.
  9. Russell L

    Russell L

    Mar 5, 2011
    Cayce, SC
    There was once a singer who said I missed too many notes, and that sometimes I was just all over the place. In my whole life I've never been that kind of player. What he was hearing was the keyboard player's left hand (which drove me crazy) missing stuff and clashing with my notes. I started counting notes missed on every gig. One night I went over to the guy after the show and said I had missed two n otes and what they were. Then, I asked him what he heard, and he said, "Oh there was some stuff." BS, I just told him what the "stuff" was. Who doesn't miss a note here and there? No one else missed so few, that's for sure. Anyway, he had the big-head since we had two radio hits then , and was trying to get me out of the band to get another bass player in who sang more than me. It worked, and he talked the leader into it. But, I caught wind of the plan and split. Nope, I won't share a stage with him ever again. Or any of them. That hurt, and I came away wondering if I was even a decent player---til I came to my senses. I've worked steadily in better bands ever since. I know you're supposed to forgive, but I haven't made it there yet.
  10. mellowinman

    mellowinman Free Man

    Oct 19, 2011
    You had to be crazy to do acid in the 80's. None of it was any good!

    Plus the music didn't go with it at all!

    Acid was for the seventies; cocaine was for the eighties.
  11. +1.
  12. pmchenry


    May 6, 2012
    SE PA
    There are a couple bands who are successful regional/national acts(far more successful than any of my bands have been) that I refuse to share a bill with because of past experiences.

    The best example: one such band was touring and going through a small club in Pittsburgh. The club had setup beer and water backstage for them, way more than they could drink by themselves. Our guitar player decided to grab a brew and the frontman for the touring act blew a friggin' gasket. Our guitar player apologized, explaining he thought they were for all the bands, but the dick just kept laying into him, acting like a spurned rockstar... would never play with them again, I don't care how much money is up for grabs.

    If a band is a bunch of rockstars and has delusions of grandeur, I'd much rather just not deal with them.
  13. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    I played for a while with a guy who was a pretty good douchebag. He would screw anyone over if it would mean he'd go another 1/2 step up his ladder. He threw the guitarist out of the band because an agency wanted someone else in there. The guitarist put thousands into this particular project, and told the other guy at the start of the band that he'd leave everything to him and just play. Without a bunch of details, DB guy stabbed this guy in the back pretty badly. I quit. A couple of months down the line he really needed me for a few gigs that would have paid $400. I needed the money and agreed to it. The guitarist who was a friend of mine begged me not to do it, so the guy would be stuck. He insisted on giving me $500 to never play with the dude again. Money wasn't an issue for him and he said he really WANTED to do it. He put me in a position where I couldn't say no. I took the money. Never played with the guy again, and won't.
  14. There are two guys that I've absolutely no interest in working with, both are vocalists, one also plays keyboards and the other plays guitar.

    The vocalist/KB player moved out this way a few years ago. He's originally from Lubbock, but spent a year or so in Austin, and therefore always referred to himself as a 'badass singer from Austin', even in message board ads. I have first-hand experience playing fill-in gigs with a few bands he's played with, and though he's charismatic and has good stage presence, he oversings EVERYTHING!!! And to be honest, really isn't that great of a singer. I'm not too confident in my singing abilities, but I could do what he does, but I have a thing about trying to not look like an a$$hole! But I digress....as far as his professionalism, or lack thereof, he's notorious for showing up to 9pm gigs at midnight and just completely blowing off rehersals and always having some half-baked ridiculous excuse as to why. He never really learns his keyboard parts and is one of those guys that cycles through his keyboard tones in between songs for like 5 minutes. He's the only person I know of who was fired from a band, then rehired, then in consecutive weekends fired from that band again AND the side project he was in.

    The second guy is actually a fair singer and really good guitar player, but is basically a modern-day ripoff of bands like Live and Better Than Ezra and class A d-bag. He had the audacity to walk into the music store I work at and say "I need to put up an ad on your bulletin board, I gotta put a band together and get in the studio, I have the baddest sh!t on the f---ing planet and people need to hear it". He walks into the store all the time expecting everyone to drop what they're doing and cater to him and only him, expects our guitar tech to work on his guitars and have them out instantly when our tech is the ONLY good tech in the area that people come to and always has about a 3-5 day waiting period, and bitches that we don't carry the type of guitar strings he likes (which is a set of strings nobody in this area plays but him).
  15. Yes.
  16. chuck norriss

    chuck norriss Banned

    Jan 20, 2011
    Yeah Paul McCartney & Eric Clapton keep asking me to form a band with them but I tell them they're way too mainstream for me. They're so annoying damn can't they see I'm a busy man!
  17. Ric5

    Ric5 Supporting Member Commercial User

    Jan 29, 2008
    I grow organic carrots and they are not for sale
    Is there anyone that you refuse to play with, no matter how good/talented they may be


    Druggies, potheads, alcoholics, and substance abusers
  18. ma4rk


    Jun 28, 2012
    Sydney, Australia
    More of a 'places I won't play at anymore' rant:
    Was out the back of this club having a smoke after a gig in Melbourne... noticed the club manager smacking himself in the face with a sock full of marbles or rocks... half an hour later he announces to the bands he was just robbed by some fellas who took the nights takings from him.
  19. Oh yeah. Quit a band that I really thought was great just because the singer/leader sucked ALL the fun out of the band. It was miserable.
  20. Hankenstein

    Hankenstein Supporting Member

    Jul 7, 2010
    Piermont, New York

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