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I've had ENOUGH of all these different handshakes!

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by CrispyDelicious, Mar 20, 2009.

  1. So my company has called back some people they let go a while ago to do some temporary work, as we have some major projects coming due. Some of these guys I haven't seen in a year or two or three.

    First guy - says hello and holds up his fist in what I assume to be a knuckle to knuckle bump. I go for the bump, but he goes for the over-under fist bump.

    Second guy, has his hand open, held up for what I assume to be a high-five-to-hand-shake combo. He just goes for the high five.

    Third guy, same as first, except he ends up going for the knuckle to knuckle, and I go for the over-under.

  2. sarcastro83


    Jul 27, 2007
    Toronto, ON
    my friend and I have a secret handshake...

    secret handshakes are great, because eventually, they become instinct, and throwing one up there for all to see just makes people think "okay, those two are stone cold BROTHERS. AWESOME."

    But I'll agree. Formal handshaking protocol seems to have gone out the window, these days. I'm fond of the tried and true "German" method. A firm grip, and one firm mutual movement downwards, and then an immediate release. It's the kind of handshake that says "Here I am. No screwing around."
  3. I hate limp handshakes...
  4. Joe Gress

    Joe Gress

    Dec 22, 2005
    Pueblo, CO
    No dead fishes for me.

    Good grip or less is though of you.
  5. santucci218


    Jan 26, 2007
    generally i fist whatever it is that they hold up and thats it. dont give them the satisfaction of teaching you a "trendy" handshake.
  6. excane

    excane Banned

    Aug 23, 2005
    New York, NY
    So you're a pitcher AND a catcher? :eyebrow:
  7. ^^^ BAAHAHAHA!
  8. This is exactly what I'm talking about. Secret handshakes are fine, but there really should just be one generic shake for everyone. German method seems the most appropriate. I would bet that 9 out of 10 of my attempted handshakes with people that aren't good friends result in floundering hands because nodbody knows what the other person is going to do.
  9. santucci218


    Jan 26, 2007
    im gonna plant my fist in your suckhole in about a second if you keep it up.
  10. TheDarkReaver

    TheDarkReaver Banned

    Mar 20, 2006
    Lincolnshire, UK
    Kinky. What if he doesn't rise to the occasion?
  11. Talkbass Off-Topic: If your thread hasn't been derailed in 10 posts or less, we aren't doing our job.
  12. santucci218


    Jan 26, 2007
  13. tplyons


    Apr 6, 2003
    Madison, NJ
    A handshake is an obvious handshake... I don't understand guys doing that spirit finger garbage after though.

    I'm all for a handshake or a fist pound. None of that under over garbage. That went out in the 90's. An open hand that isn't straight out get's high fived, no matter what.
  14. NJL


    Apr 12, 2002
    San Antonio
    i stopped shaking hands a long time ago. i just go up and kick 'em in their ballzak.
  15. i have different ones.. but it is apparent when i get there what is expected. raised hand.. high five. fist, bump it. if i approach you with a down turned palm and wiggling fingers, you are to turn your palm face up and wiggle your fingers. i forget what tv show we stole that from.

    the common one around my town is hand in, wrap thumb, upon retracking hand, lock a bear clawed hand, and out. in younger days, there was a snap at the end. its pretty universal throughout my old high school for some reason.

    there was a resurgence of high fiving when i was there. its quicker. more satisfying because theres a noise.

    firm handshakes have their place as well. as bassists.. we should all have pretty strong hands. i met mikey way, the idiot who holds the bass for my chemical romance (he doesnt PLAY much of anything. good band.. hes just not special in any way) and he totally gave me the limp noodle (thats what she said).
  16. crimson_basser


    Jul 9, 2008
    Endorsing Artist: Spector Basses
    i hug everyone
  17. FSSmikey


    Mar 7, 2009
    Miami FL
    i dont like to touch other people.

    germs, you know?
  18. Cerb


    Sep 27, 2004
    The low five is my favorite when greeting someone I'm well acquainted with. This is my default, and it is impossible for the receiver of the low five to derail it.

    For formal occasions I revert to the strong hand grab with a minuscule downward motion. Most men get this. Most women do not. If they are an elderly woman, I usually will lessen my grip. For those women that are not, I make sure they will know the proper way to shake a hand after the transaction. Breaking fingers is totally optional, but it pushes the message just a bit harder.

    Oh, and if the joints of your thumbs are not touching with the middle of your palms facing each other, it's just wrong. I hate people who go in for what I call the finger shake. The fingers should always wrap around to the back of the other person's hand. Their fingers shouldn't be touching my palm, and mine shouldn't be touching theirs.

    Can you tell I have a strong distaste for people without strong handshakes?
  19. bronzehydra


    Oct 14, 2008
    Mukilteo, WA
    I normally give firm handshakes, high fives for a few people.

    And Cerb, I know how you feel about those finger shake. You know what I do when people "cut me off" in a hand shake? I curtsy on their ass!
  20. bongomania

    bongomania Gold Supporting Member Commercial User

    Oct 17, 2005
    PDX, OR
    owner, OVNIFX and OVNILabs
    I go in for the German "manly" shake and if they are going for something different I just stand there and look at them, no reciprocation. They get the message that they look foolish.

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