Joke !

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by Electric Al, Feb 19, 2017.

  1. Woman goes before a judge ,charged with beating her husband to death with his bass collection !

    Judge says .. First offender ?

    She answers .. No first was a Gibson , then a Fender !
  2. jmattbassplaya

    jmattbassplaya Supporting Member

    Jan 13, 2008
    Classic :D
  3. Grumry


    Jul 6, 2016
    Ah yeah, those classic jokes are a diamond dozen!
    Garret Graves likes this.
  4. Killed_by_Death

    Killed_by_Death Snaggletooth Inactive

    I thought the term was "dime a dozen".
  5. DirtDog


    Jun 7, 2002
    The Deep North
    Yep - "a diamond dozen"' is a classic Rickyism!
    Grumry and Killed_by_Death like this.
  6. Killed_by_Death

    Killed_by_Death Snaggletooth Inactive

    murphy likes this.
  7. DirtDog


    Jun 7, 2002
    The Deep North
    More like this :cool:

  8. Bryan R. Tyler

    Bryan R. Tyler TalkBass: Usurping My Practice Time Since 2002 Staff Member Administrator Supporting Member

    May 3, 2002
    Reviewer: Bass Player Magazine
    They're like a blessing in the skies.
  9. Grumry


    Jul 6, 2016
    It is;):thumbsup:
    Killed_by_Death likes this.
  10. Grumry


    Jul 6, 2016
    What @Killed_by_Death don't grow won't burn him.
    ShredderMaximus and DirtDog like this.
  11. Gaolee

    Gaolee Official leathers tester and crash dummy

    If she hit him with a Gibson, it probably caused a broken neck. Of course it was fatal.
    bassestkkm, murphy and 10cc like this.
  12. For all intensive purposes, they're the same expression.
  13. capnjim


    Mar 13, 2008
    Well...if you wanted to get rid of a guitar and a husband, its like getting two birds stoned at one time.
    JRA, Garret Graves and Grumry like this.
  14. Biggbass


    Dec 14, 2011
    Planet Earth
    bada bing bada boom.

    welcome to the internet, where old jokes go to never die
    JRA, BassCliff and 10cc like this.
  15. 10cc

    10cc Inactive

    Oct 28, 2013
    Did you guys hear about the fellow without a left arm and leg?
  16. D M C

    D M C Oh good god, this again? Supporting Member

    Feb 19, 2015
    North America, Earth
    gibson.jpg used-auto-body-parts.jpg
    JRA, shadowtippy, ak56 and 1 other person like this.
  17. Clark Dark

    Clark Dark

    Mar 3, 2005
    A burglar was going through a house
    all of a sudden a voice said
    "Jesus is watching you"
    What??? Oh well thought the burglar and he went back to work...
    when he started to pick up the DVD player
    he heard the voice again,
    "Jesus is watching you"
    This time the burglar pointed his
    flashlight at the voice and asked
    "who said that"?
    It was a parrot.
    "I'm Moses" said the parrot.
    Who in the world would name you Moses
    asked the burglar?
    The parrot answered,
    "the same man that named
    the pitbull in the corner

  18. Thrillhouse


    Jan 21, 2009
    Chicago, IL
    Ricky has some of the best manipulations of common phrases ever:

    "What he doesn't grow won't burn him."
    "He passed with flying carpets."
    "Get two birds stoned at once."

    The list goes on and on...
    JRA likes this.
  19. Was he all right?
    10cc, JRA and Garret Graves like this.
  20. D M C likes this.
  21. Primary

    Primary TB Assistant

    Here are some related products that TB members are talking about. Clicking on a product will take you to TB’s partner, Primary, where you can find links to TB discussions about these products.

    May 26, 2022

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