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Login (again) Question

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Staccato, Dec 7, 2011.


  1. Staccato

    Staccato Low End Advocate

    Aug 14, 2009
    Alabama
    When entering login data from the trusty home computer (once in a while) I have to login, again. Most sessions, I'm already logged in-when I fire up the laptop. This does not coincide with deleting browsing history.

    Does the TB site initiate everyone logging in once or twice a week or something like that, or how is the timing affected?

    Hey computer gurus, what's the story? :eyebrow:

    John
     
  2. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    I'm not sure you can handle the truth. Inside your computers are little talking chipmunks. These chipmunks run on tiny treadmills that run your operating system. We call this Running A Machine (RAM). Each chipmunk is RAM. Certain operating systems require more chipmunks. Mac generally requires more chipmunks than Windows, but the RAM is made up of cheaper chipmunks in the Windows machines that often require treadmill replacements and better feeders. Now the chipmunks need to talk to the tiny monkeys. The tiny monkeys are responsible for slideshows made of soft banana peels that they wear on their faces like masks. This is called software. Sometimes the chipmunks get in fights with the monkeys and as a result they are perpetually playing pranks on each other. Sounds to me like you have a problem with a banana slug.
     
  3. JakeAndAirwaves

    JakeAndAirwaves

    Jun 3, 2011
    TX
    You are hilarious.
     
  4. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    I swear some of my best posts are lost on these nothing threads. No offense to the OP, of course. I really hope you figure out your banana slug issue.
     
  5. Ziltoid

    Ziltoid I don't play bass

    Apr 10, 2009
    Canada
    This thread advanced to the level awesome.
     
  6. Staccato

    Staccato Low End Advocate

    Aug 14, 2009
    Alabama
    Thanks, I always wondered why the laptop just seemed to have a mind of its own.
     
  7. I wish I could sig this.

    lowsound
     
  8. steven1068

    steven1068

    Oct 26, 2011
    I understand technology so much better now!

    Does this mean that there is actually a real mouse inside the computer mouse?
     
  9. JakeAndAirwaves

    JakeAndAirwaves

    Jun 3, 2011
    TX
    Actually it's a rat. Common misconception.
     
  10. What about mobile devices?
     
  11. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    Jakes right. It's a rat, but the marketing gurus at Mac, felt that a rat with its tail jammed into a serial port (they genetically re-engineered the rat to grow a USB tail a few years later) was not as user friendly for families with kiddies as a mouse. Hence it became known as a mouse. After all, the kiddies clicking on a mouse sounds so much better than the kiddies squeezing the spine of a rat. There have been a few unreported glitches around Cheetos, because they actually contained a small amount of cheese when they first came out, but now that there is nothing even remotely related to cheese in Cheetos so that glitch actually fixed itself. The only problem is when the rat, I mean mouse actually starts putting it's own thoughts together and starts exhibiting small pathetic signs of free will. In the eighties they solved this problem with mousepads that were used to cut lines of cocaine. Now we just throw the mouse out and get a new one because it's made in china.
     
  12. It's not TB. It's your computer.
     
  13. You're on a roll in this thread. You must be smoking a very "special" bag tonight.
    :bag:
     
  14. NateS

    NateS

    Sep 22, 2009
    Richmond, VA, USA
    And this is why I love TB.
     
  15. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    Mobile devices are a whole different monster. They're made up of tiny talking grubs that simply mimic what one person is saying. This is why everyone's voice sounds so screwed up, especially if your phone is made up of grubs that come from countries that speak different native language, or if the two people talking having different grub species. That causes a lot of problems, because since grubs are essentially larvae, different species mature at different rates. So you could have your grubs suddenly turn into pupa right in the middle of your conversation, which causes your call to be dropped and sometimes during important calls, it causes cell phones to suddenly transforms into projectiles thrown from your hand and shatter against the wall. Smart phones are not actually smart. They simply have a set of grubs managed by an drunk smurf midget. For some reason, midget smurfs are the only ones that can talk grub, so they get the miserable job of living an existence inside a smart phone, and as the phones get smaller and smaller, the smurf gets drunker and drunker and subsequently angrier and angrier, often taking it out on his grubs. The reason why smurfs are so happy (which is amazing considering they're all dudes with only one chick) is because they have banished, and blame any societal problems on the midgets inside of our phones, but I digress, this is an entirely different issue. Now a lot of smart phones are starting to adopt features of computers, like RAM and hard drive space, so naturally you're seeing these genetically mutated chipmunks Running A Machine, but with these species bred for their minutiae, we're seeing a certain level of aggression not seen in natural species. In some instances, the chipmunks have been known to actually eat the smurf (they're pretty much always eating the grub), and they you're phone because a worthless piece of crap. This is why we refer to it as 'giving up the ghost'. Another issue with mobile devices is their short life span. Sadly, this is the nature of grubs. They don't live very long, especially the grubs that come from China, so we're inclined to replace our cell phones after just a short while. The pay as you go phones are the worse, because they have a rare breed of grub found in the backwoods of china that grow in abundance, but are notorious for their quick life cycles. Hope that helps. Merry xmas.
     
  16. Joe Gress

    Joe Gress

    Dec 22, 2005
    Pueblo, CO
    This must be why you get all the girls.
     
  17. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    The chicks dig my angry midget smurf in my pocket.
     
  18. GregC

    GregC Johnny and Joe Gold Supporting Member

    Jan 19, 2007
    Chicago
    ITT: Maki's Two Cents on Technology. Fantastic.:D
     
  19. Ziltoid

    Ziltoid I don't play bass

    Apr 10, 2009
    Canada
    Maki, if we happen to be at the same place at the same time someday, I promise to buy you a beer. But, I cant promise i wont try touching your wee wee.
     
  20. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    I'm not too proud to take the beer, but you can keep your hands to yourself.
     

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