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my best mate done a bad bad thing

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Peter Squire, Jun 26, 2005.

  1. He cheated on his girlfriend.

    It puts me in a tough position, because I am friends to both of them. She spoke to me earlier and was desperately upset. I really didn't know what to say to her - I know he loves her, and im pissed off that he has done this to her.

    He was drunk and out with workmates. Had I been there, I would have been able to tell him not to do it.

    Anyone else been through this? Advice please!
  2. Pthump


    Nov 18, 2004
    take advantage of the girls weakness, bow chika bow wow
  3. JTbass


    Jul 2, 2004
    Asutin TX
    But don't use shampoo.
  4. Sonorous


    Oct 1, 2003
    Denton, TX
    "Let them fight amongst themselves and don't get yourself involved." at the first post.

    "Haha!" at the last two posts.
  5. I like how you're able to tie all the threads together somehow. :D

    Hopefully someday I'll be able to master that art also.
  6. Sonorous


    Oct 1, 2003
    Denton, TX
    Use the one loop and bunny ears method.
  7. nonsqtr

    nonsqtr The emperor has no clothes!

    Aug 29, 2003
    Burbank CA USA
    Let's see, in all seriousness, that's a difficult situation.

    By the way, Southpaw, thanks for your e-mail, I read it and it registered, but it somehow got misplaced in the whole recent e-mail snafu with SBC and all that, so just wanted to say "thanks", and let you know I wasn't trying to ignore you. I tried sending a PM through TB, but it's turned off, so if you want to touch bases again, please drop me another note and I'll be sure to respond.

    Let's see, my take on the situation you mentioned, is that it kinda depends on how close you are with each of the principals. Putting yourself "in the middle", between them, so to speak, is probably not a good thing. Trying to make peace between them, may or may not be a good thing. It depends on how reasonable they are.

    Man, I could tell you some stories from my earlier days, that would burn up your cerebral cortex. Once I was involved in a three-some kinda deal, and the chic seemed to like me more than the other guy, so one day we ended up shutting him out, based on a simple knock on the door.

    The next morning, my Les Paul was shattered, in pieces all over the floor, outside of my dorm. And there was nothing I could do about it, in a way I knew I was a participant in some kind of "wrong", but by then it was way too late.

    The best advice I can suggest, based on my limited experience, is to speak "first" (and alone) with the principal. Try to find out where he's coming from. If it was an "honest" cheat, in other words, if he really has a thing for the other woman (or man, or whatever), then I'd say he needs to step up to the plate and stand up for himself.

    If on the other hand, it was just a "one-shot" thing, then that's not necessarily so bad, assuming his g/f doesn't go off the deep end about it. People get very jealous that way.

    If I were you though, I'd be very careful. That sounds like an easy way to lose "both" your friends, if you're not careful.

    IMO, the best thing you can do, is to let them both know that you care, and that you're open-minded. Listen, more than talk.

    Good luck bro, I hope it works out, for them, and for you.
  8. Mike Money

    Mike Money In Memoriam

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    Dude, she's probably more than willing to uh... "get back" at him...
  9. Been there, done that- well kind of...

    I had a very good relationship with a female friend of mine, we were very, very close- unfortunatly my girlfriend at the time saw it as alot more than just being friends. No dont get me wrong- I loved my girlfriend, but sorry ladies, you all are rather irrational when it comes to relationships...

    So it happened- the girlfriend and I faught, yelled, she cryed, she handed back my ST Christopher medalion, we both cryed, she tried to brake up with me... I just held her and wouldnt let her go, not one step...

    Over the next few months, things were though. We argued more, she tryed to let me go again :rolleyes: It was very tence- but one day we woke up and everything was different, we just lay in bed and held each other... and forgot our porblems of the past.
    We loved each other, and nothing could come between that...

    If your friend, really loves his girlfriend, and she really loves loves him, he will keep at it, things of the past will be forgiven, and life resume to normal, it will be rough in the mean time- Be a good friend, dont get in the way, being angry is part of the recovery- but make sure your there if either one needs you... It will sort it's self out.

    Just for the record, the chick that I am talking about above, has to be the most annoying, pain in the ass ever... But thats the way I love her... and I'm keeping her :) 3 years of annoyance this week :bassist:
  10. burk48237

    burk48237 Supporting Member

    Nov 22, 2004
    Oak Park, MI

    MAJOR METAL The Beagle Father Supporting Member

    Hi Pete

    i would say just be their to listen to both of them and what was ment to be will happen. I understand this could be a very uncomfortable situation.
  12. Steve


    Aug 10, 2001
    You have two options.

    1. Take sides and one of them will get mad at you
    2. Stay neutral and both of them will get mad at you.

    I just went through your position about 8 months ago and over my lifetime I've been on every corner of that triangle

    Nobody got him into his mess and no one can get him out of it
  13. fr0me0


    Dec 7, 2004
    Winnipeg Canada
    how old are they and how long have they been together?
  14. Bad Brains

    Bad Brains Banned

    Jan 7, 2004
    Detroit, michigan
    If he loved his girlfriend then he would not have cheated on her. So they shouldn't be together in the first place.

    Just pull an Office Space....it will just naturally work itself out.

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