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My Cat Story

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Joe Nerve, Sep 28, 2004.

  1. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    So I'm returning home from a very stressful court hearing regarding summer unemployment benefits for substitute teaching, and as I enter my apartment, I'm overwhelmed by an incredible, indescribable, stench. A cross between vomit, feces, and garbage truck. I notice first that my girlfriend (Andrea) is gone, but her college books are spread out on my bed. Notice next that the larger of my 2 cats is gone, and that the light is flashing on my answering machine. Message is of Andrea crying, "I called my sister to come and pick me up and rush Itchkabibble to the vet. Please meet us there as soon as you get home."

    Itch has probably been my best buddy for 12 years now. Only pet parents know the feeling. I jumped into the car and prayed obsessively. Got to the vet. My pal was a mess. He had lost all control over his bodily functions and emptied himself all over my apartment and himself. He seemed paralyzed. Couldn't clean himself. Vomit on his face and paws. Andrea said he had been panting uncontrollably until just before I arrived. I put my hands on him and talked to him while we waited our turn. Told him it was OK if he felt it was time to leave us. I was sure the vet was going to give me the BIG decision to make. It was a horrible 20 minute wait. When we got into the examination room Itch started to get a little spark back in his eyes. By the third attempt to get blood from him, life was flowing back into the veins he wouldn't allow to be pierced. By the time we left the office, he was fine.

    Itch is diabetic. It seems he hasd what vets are beginning to call stress related diabetes. Sometimes he has it, sometimes he don't. I have to be really vigilant about checking his blood sugar and watching after him. Apparently that morning he decide to quit being diabetic again, and the 8 units of insulin (which is a real lot for a cat) that I gave him in the morning wasn't needed. He crashed bigtime and had a severe hypoglycemic reaction. It wasn't pretty.

    Itch is fine. He even caught and an killed the first mouse I ever saw in my place yesterday morning. Brought it to my feet and dropped it there - almost as if to say thanks.

    My cat story.
  2. I'm sorry to hear that you went through that but I'm glad everything is alright. One of my cats is diabetic so I know how where you're coming from.

  3. john turner

    john turner You don't want to do that. Trust me. Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2000
    atlanta ga
    wow, what a day. at least it had a happy ending. :)
  4. Nick man

    Nick man

    Apr 7, 2002
    Tampa Bay
    Awesome story. Im glad your buddy is still with you.
  5. Gard


    Mar 31, 2000
    WInter Garden, FL
    Joe, I'm very happy Itch is ok, and I hope you don't ever have to go through that again. It is such a horrible feeling for someone (pets are PEOPLE, people) so close to you to be that sick.
  6. Same here. It is scary when your "little friends" get sick.
  7. peskey mouse. if its his first 1 in 12 years .... and after the ordeal.... you betya he is on the ball. I have a 17 year old, and the bugger is as spritely as a 6 month kitten! dredding that 'time' though.
  8. whosaah! scary story, Joe, glad to hear the critters OK! :cool:
    here's a little humour for ya...

    1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

    2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

    3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

    4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear
    paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

    5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

    6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

    7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

    8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

    9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

    10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door on to neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

    11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

    12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

    13. Tie the little bast ard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

    14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

    15. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.


    1. Wrap it in bacon.

    2. Toss it in the air.

  9. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    that was great! thanks for the laugh!

    funny too - the vet tried to give itchkabibble some sugar water by injecting it in his mouth. HAH! itchkabibble will eat or drink molten lead if you put it in front of him, but try to make him do something he don't want to do - and you get the story above.

    cats are sooo cool.
  10. James Hart

    James Hart

    Feb 1, 2002
    Endorsing Artist: see profile
    Joe, I'm glad to hear all is well. I've been nursing my 12 year old cat through the effects cancer have on the system for the last couple months... till Sunday morning :bawl:

    he waited till the wife and I were up, must have stroked in the night/early morning. He went peacefully in my arms.

    :( it's a dark week for me, reading your story made me feel a little better.

    pet Itchkabibble a little extra from me
  11. Acephalous


    Jul 10, 2004
    I'm glad your cat goes well. I love cats! :hyper:
  12. jondog


    Mar 14, 2002
    NYC metro area
    Glad it worked out. Our dog is our child and I would go crazy if he was ill like that.
  13. Mike N

    Mike N Missing the old TB Supporting Member

    Jan 28, 2001
    Spencerport, New York
    Joe- How do you check the Cat's blood sugar? Do you draw blood or dip a test strip in his urine?

    We have a diabetic Siberian Husky, and we go the strip-in-the-urine route. Currently we give 33 units twice a day, and have to feed a food especially for diabetes.
  14. Great story.

    I love cats. They rox hXc to the max.
  15. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    I have the blood testing equipment, but I never used it as my vet advised against it. I've been using the urine strips, but I've gotten to the point (or so I thought) that I could pretty much tell how he's doing by how much he drinks and pees, and the way he acts. He seemed this time to be doing fine on the amount he was getting, and then I don't know what happened. I dropped him to half the amount of insulin and he's in great shape. I'm going to keep lowering it to see if he can get off of it again. Life is sometimes a bit difficult when you have to give your pet an injection at the same exact time, 2X a day. Especially when you're a musician who plays a lot of late night gigs, and works a day job.

    I give him special food too - prescription diet- feline w/d. I wonder if that stuff is a crock of s**t though. It was supposed to help him lose weight - he's still over 20 pounds. Good luck with your dog.

    And I'm really sorry about your loss James. I'm dreading that day. Feel as though I've been given a gift - helps me to appreciate a little more and be grateful.
  16. My cats kill mice all the time and leave them on our doorstep...its their way of gift giving, showing appreciation, or apologizing for something. Pretty friggin gross stuff, but hey its the thought that counts, right?
  17. Joe - glad to hear your cat is ok. What everyone's said +1.

    James - I'm sorry to hear of your loss. A loss of any kind - pet, human, whatever - is a hard thing to deal with. Hope you and yours are doing ok.


    Jun 1, 2003
    Orlando, FL
    glad to hear the happy ending!

    and james, sorry to hear that, my condolences
  19. kserg


    Feb 20, 2004
    London, UK
    hey bud... i dont think i've seen you around much anymore... hows things besides this story:D

    Glad it ended well btw

  20. Joe Nerve

    Joe Nerve Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2000
    New York City
    Endorsing artist: Musicman basses
    hey! somebody actually missed me. thanks. :)

    i haven't been around much for lots of reasons. i have a new computer with many new toys - recording software, artsy stuff, etc. i've also been playin and rehearsing with 2 other bands aside from the nerve - and completing our new cd. that, plus my dayjob being back in action, and posts here being less than engaging have kept me away for the most part.
    every once and a while the posts all look the same to me here and i just go, arrrrrgh! lotsa lame or just repetitious stuff, ya know - like which bass should i buy, warwick threads, people's cat stories.