Skip to the end for the tl/dr version. Here's the long version: A year ago (yes, October of 2017) the G/V (guitarist/vocalist) put out feelers on his social media about wanting to start a project, looking for bass and drums. Several co-workers pointed him in my direction and he approached me about a classic rock cover band. It's been a few years since I've played in a group so i say, sure, sounds good to me. I already play a pretty good catalog of that stuff anyway. He says he will be looking for a drummer and maybe a 2nd guitarist and will let me know. My intention at this point is to show up when told and be the bass player, not much more. Now I should also clarify that although we are co-workers, we don't work closely together. We may see each other a few minutes a day in passing. We knew of each other before this project but were not friends or hung out. So a few weeks go by and I haven't heard anything. Which seems odd because he had mentioned that he wanted to get something up and running quickly and start booking for right after the first of the year. (I'm sure you know where this is going). He also assured me that he had played this town before, and had the contacts to get us booked just as soon as we were ready. So I see him one day and he says no luck finding a drummer. That seems odd too, we do live in a smallish city, but not that small. There are musicians around. During this time we get together, just the 2 of us and run through a few songs of his. Basic stuff, Clapton, CCR, etc. The kid sounds good and has some talent. I say kid..he is in his late 20's and myself and the drummer we did eventually find, are in our late 40's. So a few more weeks go by and still no progress on the drummer. I watch CL and hadn't seen where he had posted an ad, but I figured he must have his own avenues for recruiting. I should have noticed it then, but RedFlag #1, the inability to fill out the lineup. Now we are into the holidays, and then the New Year, and I pretty much have given up on the situation, thinking that that there just must not be any drummers out there looking for a classic rock cover band. But I was enjoying practicing on my own on a regular basis again, and started getting that itch to play out. So now it is April and I go to G/V and say if you still want to do this, I will find us a drummer and we will get this going. Remember it is now April and he had originally stated that he wanted to start playing that January. So I put out the standard CL ad and go to bandmix, talk to some guys at the local music stores, etc....and have 7 drummers contacting me within a week. So it appears we have now wasted 6 months when the drummers were there all along. I won't go into the audition process, but we end up scheduling 3 auditions, 2 of which showed up (which as you know is a pretty good % for online recruiting). Both were solid but we went with the guy who could also add some pretty strong vocals. He turns out to be an excellent choice and he and I click almost immediately. He is always exceptionally well prepared and brings a professional approach to the dynamic. He also plays guitar, has been a frontman, and brings 20 years of gigging experience to the group. He was new to the area, and I considered us lucky to have grabbed him. We start rehearsing one night a week with a goal of adding 4-6 songs each week and to have 3 hours of material within a couple of months. G/V is to sing about 2/3 lead vocals and the drummer will pick up the other 1/3. I do a little backing vocal, but trust me when I say nobody wants me singing any lead. Adding songs at this pace quickly begins to go off the rails. Instead of adding 4-6 we are only able to add 1 or sometimes 2. G/V is constantly saying things like "can we put song A and B off until next week? "I didn't have a chance to look at those yet". This happens each and every week. This is huge Red Flag #2 and I know it should have been addressed right then and there. Especially since the songs he usually knew were the ones he suggested and he didn't have the time to learn the ones the drummer and I suggested. There were other times he would call me up on rehearsal day and ask me to print out the chord sheets or lyric sheets to a particular song for him. Meaning he hadn't looked at them all week until then. He wasn't learning the material, he was printing it off and reading it at rehearsal. He is talented enough to kind of get by like this, but it soon became more and more obvious that he was not actually learning the song structures. He was missing nuances and vocal cadence would often be way off. He couldn't play or sing anything without his music stand and lyric sheets in front of him. I told him on several occasions that he needed to start weening himself off of the sheets. He never did. We slogged along like this for a few months, slowly building a couple of sets, but I was growing frustrated and dropping hints to him, but nothing seemed to be changing. I was quite worried that our new to the area/accomplished drummer would get fed up with him and leave us both high and dry. It’s now September, and we were able to secure our first gig at a local outdoor festival. We were asked to provide 2 hours of music, which was good, because although we were 5 months in, that’s all we had. We were nowhere near the 3 set/36 song goal that we had set back in May. We played the gig and it went reasonably well for a first gig, but there was G/V right up front with his silver-metallic grade school music stand and big orange binder, reading the songs as he went. I and the drummer ended up doing most of the crowd interactions. It happened to be breezy that day up on the stage and his music stand blew over twice. Some guy from the crowd went and picked it up off the ground and put it back on the stage for him. I can't make this stuff up. To me the situation was incredibly embarrassing but I think G/V is so oblivious that he doesn't even realize how bad it looked. Nevertheless, I was determined to push forward and use this gig as a jump start to get a 3rd set nailed down and start playing regularly. I talked to G/V about those "local connections" he had and that maybe he should start to make a few calls because we knew that most places are booked several months in advance and i felt like something on the calendar a month or two out might help motivate us (him). Well it turned out, (surprised?) that he only knew one guy at one bar and when he called him, he was told that they weren't doing full bands anymore at that particular establishment and only wanted acoustic solo or duo acts. Red Flag #3, not having the contacts to get booked, despite assuring us that he had that part handled. Instead of the jump start I had hoped for, things went even further downhill. We only managed to get together to practice twice in the next 6 weeks, with 4 cancellations by G/V. His son had to go to the fair, his baby-momma had something he had to do, his guitar input jack was broken ( yes he only has 1 guitar), he forgot what day practice was, ...something different every week. And speaking of the one guitar (no back-up) situation, we are also using my PA, he sings through my mics, my mic stands, and he is using the drummers pedal board; which he hasn't learned to use properly, btw. His patch choices are terrible. (Probably because he only listens to the songs 10 minutes before practice; yes he made that "I just listened to this song in the driveway for the first time before i came in, haha" statement at practice one night. Talk about being oblivious to how disrespectful and frustrating that is to the other two of us who are trying to make something of this project.) So back on point...we practiced twice in 6 weeks. One of which he left early after an hour of playing. (We usually plan for 2 hours). 45 minutes in, he announces that he has to leave in about 15 minutes because he "has a date tonight". Not only is it clear that this project is far down on his life priorities but so disrespectful to not even tell us earlier in the week or even at the beginning of practice that he would be leaving early. To just pop that on us in the middle of our session is ridiculous. At our other practice during this 6 week stretch, we get to one of the songs on the schedule for that night, but he can’t find his pages. This song has been on our list for at least 3 months now. We played it at the gig. But he can’t play it without his sheet. We have to put it off until next week. This was probably the final straw. The next day, the drummer contacts me and says he has had enough. I can't blame him. We meet and he says he is still interested in getting something going with me, but that we aren't going anywhere with G/V playing our lead lines and main vocals. I agree completely. The options as we see them. 1) Find a replacement guitarist and dump G/V. Continue on under the current name with drummer handling vocal duties to get us by until we find a full time front man. 2) Add a guitarist and take the load off G/V. The new player would play all the lead lines and G/V would be reduced to playing rhythm and part-time vocals. It would reduce his load but I don't see him changing his ways. It would allow us to continue on and hold rehearsals even when he cancels or leaves early. He would soon be left behind and hopefully step aside voluntarily once he realizes he is in over his head. 3) Start a side project with a new guitarist. Similar to option #2 but our current band would still exist, we would just hand full control over to him (which was how it was supposed to be in the beginning anyway). We know what would happen then. The same thing that happened the first 6 months while he was "looking for a drummer"..nothing! The new project would be my main priority at that point of course, and I would gladly let the current name and situation fade away. We are leaning toward #3. Whichever way this goes, it's going to be an awkward conversation because he is a co-worker and has become a friend. I just wonder if he is totally oblivious to his unacceptable pattern of behavior or if he knows in the back of his mind that he is just in over his head and underestimated what it was going to take to be successful in this venture. Maybe a little of both. Anyway we all get along great together and I had high hopes for this when it began. I just missed all the red flags. I know I will most likely get blasted for letting this behavior go on as long as I did, but I do feel better getting it off my chest. Maybe somebody has an idea or insight that I haven't considered. I apologize for the length. Thanks for reading. TL/DR Semi-talented guitarist/vocalist who could have potential, but is just not putting in the work. What complicates the matter is that he is a co-worker of mine and the original founder of this project. As a trio, this band isn't going anywhere if he isn't putting in the work. The drummer and I are just spinning our wheels. We have decided that after 6 months and only 1 gig, it is time to cut ties with him.