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NEED ADVISE with my new band

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous [BG]' started by kalo, May 16, 2005.

  1. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003
    Okay guys,

    This past Sunday, I got to meet and jam with my new band...

    We are working on orginial that our lead singer (female) writes as well as covers tunes

    Well, being that it was our first time together we sounded mediocore and NOT TIGHT AT ALL.....

    The problem we have a couple of gigs lined up already...One is on May 29th that is less then two weeks away...None of us are great musicians, but with some time practice we have a lot of potentials....

    To be honest I don't think were ready and the second guitarist (who plays lead) doesn't think were ready....

    However, the other guitarist (who plays) rhythmn guitar (kind of the leader of the band) says "no one will know if we make mistakes"....

    I really don't like that kind of attitude at all....Believe me guys I don't want to play gigs if we sound medicore.. WE ARE NOT TIGHT...

    The rhythmn guitarist told me that people aren't here to see us play there here to see the star (which is the lead singer) :meh:

    Well, isn't the band supposed to make the lead singer sound good?

    In my heart we have two many guitarist the lead singer plays rhythmn guitar (while singing) then we have a rhythmn guitarist, lead rhythmn guitarist and me playing bass and we DO NOT have a drummer yet :rollno: as we are having to play the gig with a drum machine....

    In my opinion too many guitarist makes the band sound muddy.....

    Guys, I don't mean to sound all negative, but I USED to play guitar (lead and rhythmn) and I am a perfectionist (maybe that's my problem) and I know what I want to sound like and I don't just want to be another mediocre band playing gigs..To be honest sometimes I think we sounded less then mediocre...

    I want to stay in the band, but I don't want to play this gig...

    The second guitarist who plays lead feels the way I do, but doesn't say anything...I already expressed myself and that is when I got the lecture on how were not the stars and that it is all about the singer....

    Any advise? We meet again tomorrow for rehersal? It almost feels like were cramming for an exam.....

    Thanks Kalo!
  2. Psyrcle

    Psyrcle Guest

    always have butterflies in your stomach, never settle. Don't ever get comfortable because that is when you will screw up. Just keep on keeping on.
  3. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003
    Ya mean we should take this gig even if we aren't ready as a band?

    There is one thing to be nervous and to always strive for perfection and there is another thing in NOT being READY and not sounding TIGHT!!!

    Oh, well, I guess it's just my obessive, perfectionist personality....
  4. purfektstranger


    Apr 10, 2003
    Personally I wouldn't do the gig. It was irresponsible of whoever made the booking to do it with the knowledge that the finished product (the band) was not up to scratch yet.
    The risk now is that you end up sucking and that is the impression that everyone will walk away with.......
  5. purfektstranger


    Apr 10, 2003
    Oh my....I should have read to the end of your post. Essentially what you are saying is that you are booked to play two gigs but the band isnt tight yet and you are going to use a drum machine onstage because the band doesn't have a drummer yet?

    With this additional knowledge I can definitely say
    DO NOT DO IT imho :ninja:
  6. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003
    Well, that is exactly what I mean how this rhythm guitarist doesn't think people will know that we aren't tight is beyond me...

    As a musician when a band sucks I can usually tell you why they suck....Because I can hear where they are weak..

    On the other hand most people can't tell what is wrong with a band when they are not good...But they know one thing and that is when a band SUCKS they SUCK and your right first impressions means everything...

    So, now what do I do? Do, I express my feelings again? And make it known to the band leader that I don't want to do the gig? I have already done so, but he could care less and always trys to convince me that know one will care....

    Again, to him it's about the lead singer....
  7. daofktr

    daofktr irritating, yet surly

    Feb 15, 2005
    aurora, IN
    two ways to look at it, IMHO:
    1) don't do the gig, because you are a perfectionist.
    i've done that before, and never regretted it, because i knew, deep down, that we weren't ready, and that we would get nothing but a bad rep for it.
    2) do the gig, and either a] suck as much as you think you will, through no fault of yours, and be able to tell the fronter that she should call vanna white and buy a clue, or b] do better than you think you will, and have her peg you as 'eeyore'.
    i've done gigs that i had qualms about, and they've most always done well.
    there. that should clarify things for you.
    ps...mebbe it's just me, but i don't do gigs with non-live drums. i'll record to a click, but that's different.
  8. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Relax and have some fun! I played with someone like you a few years ago. Everything had to be absolutely perfect, or he would flip out. We had large crowds at our gigs, people bought our t-shirts and CD's, but he always felt like we sucked and weren't ready to gig. We eventually replaced him with someone who was more interested in having fun playing.

    Maybe you should excuse yourself from this band, and seek another.

  9. If it were me - I'd do the gig. I mean, why the hell not?

    So its your first gig with people who know nothing??

    Sorry, but I would draw a long bow, by thinking that most of us on Tb who have done a lot of gigs started the same way.

    Believe me, the experience, bad or good, will make you a better live musician.
  10. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003

    I'll just relax and do the gig with even with the drum machinie :rolleyes:

    And for the dude that kick the one band member out of his band because he was such a perfectionist (even though your band sounded good) that is one thing....

    But, I am not that type of perfectionist....Hell, if the band sounded tight I wouldn't be posting my insecurities believe me....

    Having fun to me is when a band really knows there sh....t then goes out and plays and has fun....

    It's no fun when you know your band sound average and not tight and no drummer and you have the rhythmn player who doesn't care because he feels know one will really know the difference....
  11. What kind of gig is it? Are you actually getting paid? Are you playing at a bar or other established venue? Or is it something more "low key", like a private party or school function? If it is a paying gig, or somewhere where you potentially want to be booked again in the future, I'd have my doubts. But if it just a party or event, and you're not getting any compensation, I wouldn't worry, and just have fun.

    I've never played with a drum machine...but I would make sure you practice all your songs with the machine BEFORE the gig. I hope you guys aren't just bringing it to the gig and assuming it is going to work like magic, because playing with a machine is a lot different then playing with a live drummer that can change tempo and rhythms on the fly. Make sure it works properly and you get it "programmed" in advance, etc.

    I also wonder about a few things you mentioned in your post. "The singer is the star." Did you know that before you joined the group? Are you comfortable with that mentality? Personally I doubt I would want to be in a group like that, since the "star" typically develops an ego and tells everyone how to play exactly how they want, etc. Doesn't leave much room for your own personal freedom and creativity.

    I wouldn't bail on this gig, I guess...since the group has already agreed to do it, apparently. But I think you need to assess where things are going, and how you fit in, since it sounds like you're not 100% comfortable with the band right now.
  12. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003

    You post some great questions....

    I think this might be a low key gig and I was to embrassed to ask if we are getting paid.....Maybe I should ask those questions before going crazy :rolleyes:

    However, after this May gig there is already talk about a up and comming gig in June (both gigs) are already booked....

    As for the singer...She is nice, but I kind of got the impression that the rhythm guitarist thinks she is the BOMB...

    He had us (three guitarist) get to practice at 12:00 p.m. to rehearse for two hours before the lead singer came in...The lead singer was supposed show up at 2:00 p.m.

    She showed up LATE only to come in to rehearsal telling us that she need to make a sandwhich and eat before singing...

    So our rhythm guitarist told our lead guitarist to make her a sandwhich or something...She ate and then went out side to smoke a cig. :rolleyes:

    Then cameback inside and was ready to sing...Buy time we got things rolling it was almost 3:00 p.m.....

    I wasn't a happy camper to say the least and believe me bad thought were rolling around in my mind....

    But I excused her actions because I figure that this was our first rehersal together and maybe she was just nervous....

    I wonder what would of happened if I showed up late and on top of that tell my band mates that I needed to eat before jamming :meh:

    Thanks guys for all your support....I appreciate it.....Kalo!
  13. purfektstranger


    Apr 10, 2003
    "two ways to look at it, IMHO:
    1) don't do the gig, because you are a perfectionist.
    i've done that before, and never regretted it, because i knew, deep down, that we weren't ready, and that we would get nothing but a bad rep for it.
    2) do the gig, and either a] suck as much as you think you will, through no fault of yours, and be able to tell the fronter that she should call vanna white and buy a clue, or b] do better than you think you will, and have her peg you as 'eeyore'."

    Definitely option 1.....because option 2 in the worst option imho. I would rather not play a gig for the sake of playing a gig if my band was not ready (especially if the band was missing key elements....like a drummer). There will be plenty of other opportunities to play, whether it be with vanna white or not. It also sounds to me like your guitarist has a thing for your singer. Fair enough except if she gets special treatment (like showing up to practice when she likes) because of her relationship with your guitarist, then one of them has to go. Do yourself a favour and don't play that gig. You will thank me for it. :smug:
  14. pklima

    pklima Commercial User

    May 2, 2003
    Kraków, Polska
    Karoryfer Samples
    This band does not sound promising. The singer and rhythm guitarist do sound like they're likely to be problems and will probably end up as a MIDI-backed duo within a month. But I'd still give them a chance. Playing under crappy circumstances can be a valuable learning experience... personally I would do the gig, see just how good or bad the band really is and then decide whether to leave then band. If y'all play decent and a few drummers come out of the woodwork after the show, great. If not you'll be more experienced, wiser and looking for a better band.
  15. purfektstranger


    Apr 10, 2003
    Some valid points there. I guess i am thinking too much of the potential embarassment factor. If you decide to play the gig it is useful if someone can film it (I think this was previously mentioned). At least that way, you can see and hear how it sounded. If you decide to do the gig, at the very least, make sure that you and the drum machine are tight!!
  16. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003
    hmmm? I was just about to thank perfekstranger and say that I was going to bail :rolleyes:

    I will be honest with you guys....I usually don't have a problem with constructive critizism...

    This rhythm guitarist thinks he is the boss of the band and he has study for 15 years consecutively with a good guitar teacher......

    He STILL can't play good guitar...His rhythmn playing is SLOPPY and he had the odacity to tell me that I was off timming when coming into the intro of a cover song we were doing...

    He was the one that was off time...He doesn't listen to other players and he just likes to play loud....

    I know I wasn't off time because I was keeping time to the damn DRUM MACHINE!!!!

    This guy is a nice guy, but he is running the show and tells everyone what to do in a nice way, but still it gets grading because he is not the best musician, and I am not a puppet.

    Tomorrow, I will meet with them for rehearsal...I might just tell them that I am just not comfortable about this gig and that I will decline to play...

    The sad thing is I don't care if there not great musicians because with the right attitude and hardwork we can be a great band.....

    But, I am seriously starting to think the real problem is I don't clash with this guy....He seems like a father figure as well...He is 46 years old (not that 46 is old) but he is way older then the rest of us....

  17. purfektstranger


    Apr 10, 2003

    It is for you to decide if you will be able to play a gig with these guys. It may turn out alright.....who knows. At least if you discuss your concerns with the band, everyone will know how you feel. It may even help the overall mood.
    If you play....do your best and good luck.
  18. kalo


    Jul 29, 2003
    Well, I might give it a whirl, but ya know I already expressed my concerns and the rhythm guitarist said "It's not about us it's all about her"...

    But, ya know I have to be truthful...I am begining to think I just don't like the whole musician thing..I don't fit in....

    I want to play music not take cig breaks after playing a couple of songs...I don't want to have to wait for the lead singer to arrive...LOL!!!

    I really don't want to play gigs where we don't have a drummer and come to find out we'll be playing for the rhythm guitarist AA meeting :rolleyes: then on June 29th we play for a biker place....

    I am not willing to do all that...So, I know a big part of it is me as well...

    But the positive is....I practice and become good musicians so that we can play better venues....
  19. pklima

    pklima Commercial User

    May 2, 2003
    Kraków, Polska
    Karoryfer Samples
    This band sounds worse and more likely to fail with your every post... might still be good experience but I would be actively looking for another band even while playing with these guys. It sounds like you've already learned a LOT from this band anyway...
  20. oldfclefer

    oldfclefer low ended

    May 5, 2005
    Southern Ohio
    It's the gig or sit at home, right? I'd probably do the first one. If it's unbearable, I'd bow out of the second gig. Sounds like you've got some egos going on there, which isn't uncommon, but you can always look for something else while keeping up your chops with these guys.

    Good Luck


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