Non-bass related humor thread

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by jrthebassguy, Dec 29, 2003.

  1. Post your favorite jokes!

    I'll start:

    Heaven and Hell

    Heaven is where the police are British,
    the chefs are Italian,
    the mechanics are German,
    the lovers are French,
    and everything is organized by the Swiss.

    Hell is where the police are German,
    the chefs are British,
    the mechanics are French,
    the lovers are Swiss,
    and everything is organized by the Italians.
  2. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    is this supposed to be funny, mike? resorting to ethnic jokes? consider yourself warned.
  3. Thor

    Thor Moderator Staff Member Gold Supporting Member

    Wasn't this thread already in the lounge?

    I'm not [edit] ... that might be a bit out of
    line ...

    Mike, you might want to think on that post a bit.
  4. ROTFLMAO !! ;)
  5. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan

    Ya, I'm sorta torn on it.. its not like attacking them or anything... in fact, i heard them from my Cousin who is jewish.... so i dunno...

  6. not all of us has access to the lounge, you know
  7. Wrong Robot

    Wrong Robot Guest

    Apr 8, 2002
    exactly, that was the point.
  8. "Aren't clown fish suppose to be funny?":confused:
  9. Blackbird

    Blackbird Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Mar 18, 2000
    Three peanuts were walking down the street and one was assaulted...peanut.

    I'll go now.
  10. see a mollusk walks up to a sea cucumber...

  11. There's this crazy cat that walked into the tropicana one night. He had a solid gold belt buckle, one of those crazy rodeo ones that you could eat off of, says "JoJo" on it. He's got one of those gawdy bracelets says "JoJo" on it. He's got a gold necklace says "JoJo", solid gold cufflinks; they all say "JoJo" on them. This little chinese bellhop trots up to him and says, "Excuse me, Mr. JoJo". He goes "Shut the **** up, I don't want nobody knowin I'm here!"

    This guy Sally gets pulled over on Long Island by the Feds. So they toss his car and find two barettas in the glove box and an ax under the front seat. So they step out and saunter over to him in that condescending way of theirs and say, "You know, not for nothin Sal, but you got any idea WHY you have two handguns in the glove box, and an ax under the front seat?" Sally looks up at him and says, "Are you kidding me? I will NEVER rent a car from ******* Avis again..."

    (They're both better in person.)

    edit(jt) : language.
  12. YES!!!! I was hoping someone would of caught on :D

  13. Took me forever to get.

  14. that reminds me of the orange who lost his job at the factory.

    he couldn't concentrate.

    and hey, did you hear they assasinated the prime minister of scotland?


    they kilt him.



  15. I'll give this a thread a day before it's closed.
  16. I'll give it 21 hours 32 minutes and 54 seconds.
  17. 2 guys walk into a building. You figured they would have seen the building.
  18. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan

    My bad... I was weary about posting them... They weren't discriminatory, but they still had some potential to offend... I sincerely apologize to everyone for posting those jokes.
  19. Matthew Bryson

    Matthew Bryson Guest

    Jul 30, 2001
    You ever give any thought as to whether or not your "title" might be offensive or in poor taste? (we know that your surname is not Hunt;) )

    If you know that something has the potential to offend and you are a little leery to even post it, next time, go ahead and listen to that little voice in your head and don't post it. A good rule of thumb for you to live by might be: When in doubt, don't.


    edit - FWIW: I personally am not offended, but I am greatly disturbed when I read those words and then end up thinking of you saying those words allowed. Eeewwwwww