Post a One-Liner

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by mellowinman, Dec 5, 2015.

  1. it was raining

    2 vote(s)
  2. I had a cup of carrot soup

    10 vote(s)
  3. I thought, "this changes everything."

    29 vote(s)
  1. mellowinman

    mellowinman Free Man

    Oct 19, 2011
    My wife told me to stop impersonating a Flamingo. I had to put my foot down.
  2. Wrecked him, nearly killed him....
    S-Bigbottom likes this.
  3. My wife told me to stop impersonating a bass player.
    I had to put my Squier down.
  4. bholder

    bholder Affable Sociopath Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

    Sep 2, 2001
    Vestal, NY
    Received a gift from Sire* (see sig)
    Brandy: the more I snifter, the more I liked her.
    murphy and S-Bigbottom like this.
  5. Lobster11

    Lobster11 Supporting Member Supporting Member

    Apr 22, 2006
    Williamsburg, VA
    Snifter? I don't even know'er!
    BlueAliceOasis and murphy like this.
  6. The water's cold.....and deep too.
  7. 4 million sperm cells.........and yours was the fastest???? :jawdrop:
  8. mellowinman

    mellowinman Free Man

    Oct 19, 2011
    If you don’t know what introspection is – you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
  9. Mark Wilson

    Mark Wilson Supporting Member

    Jan 12, 2005
    Toronto, Ontario
    Endorsing Artist: Elixir® Strings
    I've been told I can be condescending. That means I talk down to people.
    Scott C., ImNotJoel, ptg and 7 others like this.
  10. zortation


    Dec 26, 2011
    Toronto, ON
    You could start an argument in an empty room...
  11. kobass

    kobass Supporting Member

    Nov 3, 2003
    Outside Boston
    How would I handle myself abroad? Why don't you get one here and we'll see....
    BlueAliceOasis, Will_White and murphy like this.
  12. sissy kathy

    sissy kathy Back to Bass-ics Gold Supporting Member

    Apr 21, 2014
    Arbutus, MD
    Saying s/he's 'dumb as a brick' is an insult to bricks.
  13. Is the coast clear....I don't know, I can't see that far.
  14. El Güero

    El Güero Inactive

    Oct 5, 2015
    So anyways there was this lazy bassist who came out of the closet in a ghost town and he decided to split since he didn't like all the ghosts calling him heterosexually challenged names so anyways he took off down the road driving his kit car with a dog in his lap and no sooner than he got out of the ghost town he felt his stomach twisting and rumbling and he remembered he ate a bunch of TNC for lunch so anyways he had to hurl and he had just enough time to put a protective helmet on his dog before he spewed all over the dashboard making it look like it had been refinished with vintage FENDER tort.

    Icemanaroonie, Mktrat and mbelue like this.
  15. My Mother never saw the irony in calling me a Son-of-a-B*!tch.
  16. Bluebottle


    Sep 15, 2015
    He is a self-made man in love with his creator.
    murphy likes this.
  17. charlie monroe

    charlie monroe Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 14, 2011
    Buffalo, NY
    I used to be indifferent but now I can't be bothered.
  18. Richland123


    Apr 17, 2009
    The guy with the split personality was always beside himself.
    BlueAliceOasis, bluesblaster and ptg like this.
  19. Bluebottle


    Sep 15, 2015
    Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
  20. Primary

    Primary TB Assistant

    Here are some related products that TB members are talking about. Clicking on a product will take you to TB’s partner, Primary, where you can find links to TB discussions about these products.

    May 26, 2022

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