Question about giving a toast

As a guy who has seen many many many speeches/toasts ( i play around 2 or 3 weddings a week) all i can tell you is keep it short and simple.

There is nothing worst than seeing someone trying to be funny and digging his own hole for 10 minutes with people looking at each other with confused faces.

Limit yourself to a couple funny/embarrassing anecdotes about the groom, and best wishes to the couple.

 

What he said- SHORT and sweet

 

Haha I'm best man at Xmas for my oldest and bestest mate....I'm on about my 10th draft and I've got about 30 seconds worth of material

 

I gave a toast at an old friends wedding a few years ago. It ws pretty short, comical, and I had a good buzz on. I made it all up on the fly.

My ex's father went on and on in his toast, so long that I dont remember anyone else getting to say anything, and it was embarassingly bad. He pretty much said how he liked his other daughter better... HA!

 

Avoid cliches. No obvious jokes, no cheezy stories. Nothing inappropriate or 'edgy'

 

just don't. that's my thought. I have my wedding coming up in September and i do not want toasts. they are almost always painful to hear.

 

Short and sweet is best. Tell an embarrassing story and bottoms up!

I was at a wedding with a very drunk best man once, and the rambling, pointless toast went on FOREVER!!!!!

 

Public speaking should follow the length of a woman's dress - short enough to keep their attention, long enough to cover the subject.

I don't recall who gets the credit for that, but it wasn't me.

 

Short is what you need to aim for. How many drunken fools are also gonna toast, as stated- at length, incoherently and/or in poor taste(yeah, I said that)... Be the guy that gets it right

 

I've given many and married a few friends as well. You can't ever be too classy but you can certainly be too raunchy. Never a good plan....know your audience and play to the most conservative in the room.

About 5 minutes before my best friend's wedding I came up with this theme...."Today we all witnessed the marriage of someone's son, someone's daughter, someone's brother, someone's sister, someone's cousin, someone's niece, nephew and someone's grandkids, someone's high school flame and without a doubt...... my best friend."

Start sweet, toss in a light personal jab on the guy, lay some high praise on the wife and something cute/witty about the first time you met her, have everyone raise a glass....keep it under 60 seconds, no cursing...winner.

 

My sister expected me to give a speech at her wedding, which she sprung on me about 15 minutes before I was supposed to do it. I told her I was going to scream "Drink 'em if ya have 'em!" at the top of my lungs after mumbling incomprehensibly, and she dared me to do it. So I did. Stunned silence from everyone. My sister and her husband laugh about that to this day. Apparently the people there who did know me didn't think it was out of character.

That was nothing compared to another family friend who's gift to the bride/groom was a body contortionist exhibition (a bunch of circus folks). She did upside down splits in a bikini, right in front of a 10 year old boy who I'm pretty sure spontaneously exploded into puberty about 30 seconds later.

Good times.

 

I just gave one a month ago for my friend. I didn't time it, or even write it down, but I knew what I wanted to say. I would guess it was a minute and 30 seconds maybe? Don't be too long, everyone's waiting to eat. Don't say anything someone's grandmother wouldn't want to hear.

Whatever you do, don't make it longer than like 5 minutes.

I don't think there are any connoisseurs of best man speeches that go to weddings. If you don't go too long or make an ass of yourself or the groom, nobody is going to reminisce about it for years.

 

^this