Session with a dreamer

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by Peter Squire, Jan 12, 2006.

  1. Hey guys

    So we got booked to back this guy on a session for a song he's written about Adelaide (my hometown) for our national Australia Day celebrations.

    We get the charts, very easy song. All the expected chords in the expected order etc. Session is going well, rhythm tracks down fairly quickly etc.

    Anyway, I go into the control room where this guy (about 50) is chatting to the engineer, and he is very excited about how great his song is. He's gonna get sheet music printed so he can send it to all the primary schools so every kid in Australia can learn his song. He's going to send it to every radio station in the land. He's even been offered a gig playing his song at a local carpet warehouse (!)

    He turns to me and shouts "We've got a hit on our hands here!!!" He asks me if our band want to have our photo taken with him for our own publicity opportunites.

    I just didn't have the heart to tell him his song was ordinary and that it wasn't likely to ignite the charts. Anyone else have stories to share about working with dreamers?
  2. Working with WHAT? (ohh..I thought you said 'drummers'. nevermind.)
  3. fr0me0


    Dec 7, 2004
    Winnipeg Canada
    I used to hang out with some people that played ina band, wheenver something moderetly cool happened they'd be like "thats one for the book"

    they recently got booe'd off the stage at a battle of the bands.
  4. Yup, the first band I was in had a guitarist/singer that wrote a lot of music and thought he was sitting on a gold mine with his songs.

    The reality was that he wasn't great at guitar, he couldn't sing at all, and the songs weren't super either.
    The songs actually weren't bad but it all sounded the same, he had the same recipe for all his music.
    Additionally he couldn't take criticism however constructive and subtle, and everything had to be done his way.
    That band broke up and all members but him reformed in another band that went on for years.

    It was a good 10 years since I played with him, but I met him not so long ago and he's in the same place today as he was then.
    Forming new bands to make his own music, they break up because he's impossible to work with, and he goes on to form the next one.

  5. Man, our band has never been booked at a carpet warehouse. Maybe we should call it quits. :oops:

    I used to know a guy who was certain he was going to be a rock star. Sounds similar to the guy described in the original post...only difference was this guy was only about 21 or know the type...hasn't finished college, can't hold down a regular job, but somehow thinks he's going to be the next Jimmy Page or something. Would always just sit around playing guitar and writing songs he thought were awesome, but were pretty generic. Last I heard he had spent an insane amount of money to get a bunch of gear for his own "recording studio" know, fancy new computer, etc. This was after getting kicked out of three consecutive bands. I wonder if he had to return it, or if it got repoed yet....
  6. FriscoBassAce


    Dec 29, 2004
    Frisco, Texas
    Independent Manufacturers Representative
    The drummer in my last band was that way. After practices, we would go to a restaurant and have some food and drink. After about two beers, he would start saying things like: "Boys! We're gonna be famous!" and "The women are going to be throwing themselves at us!"

    Mind you, we were a cover band, and we just weren't that good. Everytime I heard him say those kind of things, I at first thought he was joking. Later I thought maybe it was just his way of getting everyone pumped up. Towards the end, I realized he was serious and really thought that our pitiful little band was going to be the next big thing, complete with gold records and a world tour! The funniest thing was that the guy couldn't even keep good time on his drum kit!

    Now when I was about 20 and playing in bands during the 80's, we all thought we were going to "make it" and become superstars. How naive we were!
  7. Our last drummer was like that too, talking about how women were going to be throwing themselves at us at our first gig and stuff. Fortunately for us, our first gig with him was also our last.
  8. I played with this guy last year. I responded to a generic bassist wanted thread, and i got a 35 min phone call about how good his songs were and how much equiptment i would need to play with him blah blah blah. The first practise/audition was ordinary, we played some covers and he asked me to play with them for good. After the first few rehersales, which were just us playing the same cover songs over and over for 2 hours, we sat down and talked a bit. My points were just hey theres some new bars, ill call them up and see if we can get like a thursday night or soemthing. But his response was " ive got books at home on how to get into the buisness, so dont worry about that."

    The next jam he shows up all excited and starts talking about how good these songs he has been writting are, so i said well lets hear them man. But not to my suprise i never did hear them. But the one I learn he is all "hey i got a call from harley davidson, they are using this tune in their next commercial." And about how now we will all be riding 2006 Harleys to our shows and such. Let alone we hadn't played a show yet.Not to my suprise nothing happened, and I left for university, and now when i visit the forums to find bands, he still posts looking for a abssist.
  9. Yeah, I hate the people that will call (typically for me it's when they're answering an ad), and have to yap for half an hour talking about how great everything is going to be. Usually tells me they're probably not ready for a band situation, because they've got their head in the clouds.
  10. lildrgn


    Jul 11, 2000
    Seattle, WA
    Good lord. We sound like twins. Good stuff.
  11. Cool! I've never had a twin before - welcome into the family!

    Does that mean our former guitarists are the evil twins..? ;)

  12. Well, we aren't actually playing in the carpet warehouse - I flatly refused to play (am I a bass diva??)

    He's using our backing CD and going to sing along. Can you imagine why I refused now?

    As strange as it sounds, I'm quite glad that other people around here have had to deal with people like this.

    As a bonus cookie, I used to work with a singer who reminded me of the little red caboose.

    "I think I can, I think I can..."

  13. Maybe You should've taken the carpet warehouse gig - the acoustics should be great with carpets draping the walls everywhere...:)


  14. He can't play a solo acoustic version why?
  15. AuG


    May 22, 2005
    Fort Collins, CO
    +1 Been there done that. :rollno:

  16. Because he can't play an instrument. He struggles to carry a tune in a bucket.
  17. Back in the 80s, I was in a band backing a really good female singer. Some gigs were lined up at a local theater and the keyboard player was all excited about the future and "when we tour Europe!". At the time I thought "how can you be so naive?", I'll believe it when I see the airplane tickets.

    As it turned out, we did a couple of shows, didn't get paid all the money we were owed, and the manager wasn't reachable. I left the band and joined another one with older members who were much more realistic.
  18. The first "bassist wanted" ad I responded to was sort of like these stories.

    The "bandleader" played rhythm guitar and some keys, and there was a second "lead" guitar player - they played the bandleader's originals and a few covers, and were looking for a rhythm section.

    So I get to the audition, and discover the bandleader lives at his parents' house, and the audition is being held in their basement. The guy was probably about 23 years old, and I don't think he had a job or was in school.

    The lead guitarist couldn't make the audition due to something last minute at his work, but we decided to jam a little anyways. (I was already there, right?). So we jam a little and chat, and this kid was going on about all of this stuff, how if this didn't work out with the lead guy and putting together a band, he was just going to start doing it on his own, everything short of saying "I'm going to be a big, big star".

    I left thinking no way someone culd be so naive - but I see he's not alone.:rollno:
  19. willgroove2


    Aug 16, 2003
    chicago IL
    Endorsing Artist;Essential sound products,Dunlop, Ergo Instruments
    I got a call for a session on a recommendation from a drummer friend,guy offered union scale,cool no problem.I get to the studio turn's out i know the engineer worked together before and he say's"your in for a interesting afternoon"i asked him why? and he said "you'll see".guy get's there and we start working, they put up the track,fairly straight forward,cool let's track.the guy say let me tell you something first;this project is going to change Gospel music as we know it(i didn't know it was a Gospel song,no vocals)he then goes on a rant for 30 minutes about his anointed genius.I look at the engineer,he's cracking up.after 30 min i said great,cool im happy to be a part of this;can we do it now?he had went into a little trance and when i said that he snapped out it and said ok but i understand if you can't get the first few times:i did it in one take with one small fix and got my check and got the hell out of there.
  20. Back in the day, a friend of mine who was studying DB had an interesting "gig". There was this middle-aged lady who wrote songs but of course had no musical training whatsoever. However she wanted to have charts made of the songs so she could someday book a studio with pro musicians and make a record...

    So she would send home-made cassettes of the songs to my friend, who then wrote the charts (melody+chords). And she paid quite well for each chart. My friend never actually met this person, he had just answered an ad she had put on the classifieds.

    I once got to hear one of the tapes she had sent and I couldn´t believe my ears. Take the worst American Idol contestant you´ve ever heard, multiply it by two and mix it with seriously deranged "songs" about babies, European Union (!), war and peace etc.

    For some reason she had decided to sing in her bathroom, so the tapes sounded really weird and echoy. Naturally she couldn´t play any instrument so her singing was unaccompanied - except for few songs, where she had decided to spice things up by playing tambourine! The downside was that the tambourine distorted horribly and completely drowned her voice.

    Eventually the lyrics got stranger and stranger. The woman was obviously mentally ill and my friend didn´t feel right taking her money, so he ended the whole affair. To this day I wonder if she really made the record....