Psst... Ready to join TalkBass and start posting, make new friends, sell your gear, and more?  Register your free account in 30 seconds.

SEX and the BASS *For Real*

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous [BG]' started by cschenk78, Jul 15, 2001.


  1. cschenk78

    cschenk78

    Mar 12, 2000
    Watertown, NY
    Thanks for looking....

    I always think of sex while I am playing the bass...mostly because men think about it like every 3 or 5 seconds or something...BUT, how many of you have ever thought of the bass while having sex...cuz personally...that almost NEVER happens to me, but it has ;)
     
  2. B-Note Cowboy

    B-Note Cowboy Guest

    Jun 13, 2001
    Tulsa, OK
    "that almost NEVER happens to me"...

    I'm confused. Are you talking about sex or playing the bass here? he heh...

    Gotta admit, I only think about sex while I'm playing if I see a chick in the audience that sort of brings such a thought up. Kind of distracting so I tend to only think about sex between songs. :)
     
  3. Dave Castelo

    Dave Castelo

    Apr 19, 2000
    Mexico
    actually i never think about sex while playing... i guess my brain is busy with the notes...

    but when it´s over the sex thoughts come around... no kidding :D

    so bass playing is like some kind of libido relaxer (to me) ;)
     
  4. rickbass

    rickbass Supporting Member

    Well, scale length and neck radius come to mind.....
     
  5. Pacman

    Pacman Layin' Down Time Staff Member Gold Supporting Member

    Apr 1, 2000
    Omaha, Nebraska
    Endorsing Artist: Roscoe Guitars, DR Strings, Aguilar Amplification
    I was playing in a contemporary jazz group for a little more than a year and everything in the band was related to sex. Let me explain.

    We never jumped into a tune (or a solo or an outro etc) right away. We always 'set the mood' (you know - light some candles, put on some barry white, pour some cavasier, you get the idea). Solos were built on the same 'seduction' kind of idea; take it slow build slowly - there was even a 'pillow talk' after :D Seriously, though, it changed the way I look at ensemble playing. It sounds weird, but that was the best band I was ever in.....

    God, I miss those guys!
     
  6. Dave Castelo

    Dave Castelo

    Apr 19, 2000
    Mexico
    but there were girls, right?? or just u boys? :D

    :eek:
     
  7. yawnsie

    yawnsie

    Apr 11, 2000
    London
    (I apologise to anyone who doesn't understand this comment.)

    "Playing Jazz music is, in many ways, a lot like making love to a beautiful woman..." :D
     
  8. Erlendur Már

    Erlendur Már

    May 24, 2000
    This reminds me of when my first band let this dude hear our songs, and he said that we should quit thinking about playing rock, we should make music for porn movies!:D
     
  9. Pacman

    Pacman Layin' Down Time Staff Member Gold Supporting Member

    Apr 1, 2000
    Omaha, Nebraska
    Endorsing Artist: Roscoe Guitars, DR Strings, Aguilar Amplification
    You got it, exactly.
     
  10. Phil Smith

    Phil Smith Mr Sumisu 2 U

    May 30, 2000
    Peoples Republic of Brooklyn
    Creator of: iGigBook for Android/iOS
    What about an average looking woman with advanced sex skills and ego boosting properties??? ;)
     
  11. that's what playing ska is like
     
  12. Bass is a sex machine, cause we all do it deeper than anyone else:D
     
  13. TheFrizzleFry

    TheFrizzleFry Guest

    Nov 21, 2000
    Stinktown, Pa, USA
    Oh yeah, it's impossible not to think about sex while playing bass. I like to run my hands down it's neck, caress it's head, and undo the g-string... err, whatever.

    I think it's perfectly natural unless you think about having sex with your bass, then there is a problem.
     
  14. Albino_Ryno

    Albino_Ryno Guest

    Sep 17, 2000
    Knoxville TN
    Well, considering I don't get a whole lot of sex I really can't say much here. I think it depends on what type of music you're playing. If it's country I don't see many thoughts of bumpin' and grindin' creeping into my head, however if you're playing a song like....oh I don't know...."Feel like making love" I don't see any way to prevent sexual thoughts. I've definately had thoughts of sex while playing, but thoughts of playing while having sex...? I don't know, maybe if the chic said stuff like "Run your fingers up and down my neck" or "I like it when you SLAP my ass" or maybe "Lower and faster". Other than that, I think I'd be focused on sex.....unless....I was playing bass while having sex....that's a thought. I bet you could have fun with subwoofers!
     
  15. Bruce Lindfield

    Bruce Lindfield Unprofessional TalkBass Contributor Gold Supporting Member

    Alright Swiss Tony - now you've got them going; tell them how selling a car is like making love to a beautiful woman! But take that crap wig off first! :D
     
  16. I like playing bass naked.
     
  17. Carolyn

    Carolyn

    Jun 18, 2001
    Newcastle UK
    Well....I couldn't resist this....

    Music is related a lot to sex (IMO)..they are both hugely pleasureable!...
    Music = Bass = SEX ?
    What is a huge turn on ( from a female bass players point of view!!!) is watching a good bassist on stage ...feeling that bass.

    Or maybe thats just ME???????
     
  18. well, you all seem to find bass more sexually stimulating than i do.

    you know what that means?

    i need a bigger amp. [​IMG]
     
  19. yawnsie

    yawnsie

    Apr 11, 2000
    London
    Ah, I knew I could rely on you to spot the obscure Fast Show reference, Bruce!
     
  20. Bruce Lindfield

    Bruce Lindfield Unprofessional TalkBass Contributor Gold Supporting Member

    Have you noticed that the guy who was the object of these mini-lectures - he never got to say much more than "OK Swiss but.." before being interrupted by the usual monologue - is now appearing in serious TV dramas? I wonder if that's how he got his big break? Also do you remember Charlie Higson as the singer in the "Higsons" on "Top of the Pops" - I don't want to live with Monkeys!


    It's all gone black - Johnny - black, black .....