So, another recent thread got me thinking about this. Here lately there have been DOZENS of threads that invole a TB member coming to US to vent about something a band leader did or wants to do. First of all, it seems that I guess many of the people who run bands these days are egomaniac overgrown 4 year olds. Either that, or the people who play for them are just WUSSES. I understand rank. I get it. Somebody else is in charge. But I have worked in the music and construction industries for a couple of decades now. If I have a big problem with a boss it doesn't change anything about how I'm going to handle except the tone of my voice. If a kid rides his dirt bike through my yard I'm going to get in his face and yell. If I have a problem with a boss I'm going to start with "Hey, sir, you got a sec? We need to talk." But I am STILL going to get into it and try to resolve things like GROWNUPS do. And even if the boss still wants things his way and disagrees with me, I get over it and either go back to work or go work somewhere else. But this thing of just not being able to talk to your band leader as if he sits high up on some kind of thrown just baffles me. You don't have to grab the guy by the collar and shake him. But you also don't just have to sit back and take it with your tail between your legs. So, who ARE these band leaders? WHY do you feel that you can't just walk up to them and start a grownup conversation about your problems with how they handled something? Are gigs so few and far between where you are that you feel you HAVE to put up with a jerk for a band leader? Can you not move to a place where things are more in your favor? (Another thing we will have to address later is why people have a problem moving to a town where circumstances are better.) Anyway, what are your thoughts? Have we just gotten to the point where NOBODY can disagree with anybody else? Is conflict SO scary that nobody is willing to try to work things out? Or are band leaders just a bunch of jerks and you guys are starving artists who have to put up with it or be homeless? Which is it?