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The best way to date a bass player...

Discussion in 'Bass Humor [DB]' started by bassplayergf, Jan 7, 2012.

  1. bassplayergf


    Jan 7, 2012
    We all know, bass-player or otherwise, that bassists are a unique breed.

    As such, how would you suggest dating a bass players who like to "talk bass"? ;)
  2. Marcus Johnson

    Marcus Johnson

    Nov 28, 2001
    Duct tape.
  3. David1234


    Jun 1, 2004
    Sydney, Australia
    Endorsing Artist: SWR Amplifiers
    Check their serial number.
  4. Send flowers, $'s, sweet talk and serious drugs? :hyper:
  5. TroyK

    TroyK Moderator Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2003
    Seattle, WA
    Own a station wagon, SUV or mini-van and offer rides to and from.

    Ask a lot of questions about what strings he uses and crinkle your brow and tilt your head as he walks through is decisions. Pepper words like "woodiness" "Presence" and "Fundemental" into your response. It doesn't matter if you know what they mean. None of us actually do either.

    Last but not least, any time you hear him play say "Wow, great job, honey. That drummer was lucky to have you owning the time. He would had drifted all over the place on his own."
  6. cut off a leg and count the rings.
  7. Mike Goodbar

    Mike Goodbar Supporting Member

    Jun 6, 2001
    Charlotte, NC
    When you leave him for a drummer (and you will), do it with some measure of kindness. Remember, bass players may not be as exciting as drummers, but they are more sensitive.
  8. bejoyous


    Oct 23, 2005
    London, Ontario
    If you want to know everything about bass, start the evening with one of these...

    1. What's the difference between white hair and black hair on the bow?

    2. What's the difference between French and German bow?

    3. How did Domenico Dragonetti influence Beethoven?

    4. Is the music of Bottesini as difficult as it sounds?

    5. How many strings does a bass have?

    6. Is that a flute attached to your scroll?

    ...then sit back for an hour and enjoy your drink and dinner. Hopefully, by dessert, he'll have talked himself out and you can talk about what interests you for a while before you go to that concert that features an interesting bass player.

    Talking shop is a phase us men go through.
  9. Marcus Johnson

    Marcus Johnson

    Nov 28, 2001
    And then, after not gettin' any for a few years, we learn to not talk about the bass so damn much.
  10. hdiddy

    hdiddy Official Forum Flunkee Supporting Member

    Mar 16, 2004
    Richmond, CA
    Just talk about how big his tone is...
    And tell him what progressions you like to do when you play the turnaround. Delay some ii-Vs and it'll make for a bigger climax!

    HAWWT!!! :bassist:

    If you want to get kinky, just tell him you'd like to play as a trio!
  11. Herbie 80's

    Herbie 80's

    Dec 15, 2008
    All I have to say is LOL.
  12. hdiddy

    hdiddy Official Forum Flunkee Supporting Member

    Mar 16, 2004
    Richmond, CA
    Actually even more kinky is if you ask him if he wants you to play slap and to mute his bridge. Sticking a towel or foam in his f-holes and/or under his tailpiece is optional. Prevents the feedback scream.
  13. Beginner Bass

    Beginner Bass

    Jul 8, 2009
    Round Rock, TX
    A&R, Soulless Corporation Records
    Simple: Make sure that you tell him he sounds JUST like (Insert second favorite bassist, because we all know personally that we're the best bassists ever) at his gig.
  14. Roger Davis

    Roger Davis

    May 24, 2006
    Ask him how high he likes his action.

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