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The one that got away !

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by sturoc, Jan 28, 2013.

  1. sturoc


    Dec 12, 2009
    Back in my early days along with playing in many bands I also worked production stage crew etc.
    It was good $ and got to deal with a lot of great gear all the time and meet so many great musicians especially bassists !
    there was always the lure of Sirens though.....

    The year: 1985.
    Venue: Roseland Ballroom NYC
    The Bands : Rough Cutt , Helix and that great metal band ACCEPT.
    Was on stage crew Accept was in their final song for the nite.
    I had spied this tall brunette in black leather mini skirt etc, hanging by stage right audio stacks
    So i sauntered over to her and she locked eyes with me.

    She pulled me close and she devilishly said in my ear " I'll do anything to get backstage"using her tongue on my ear as her exclamation point !
    Now being in the biz for a number of years It took about a half a second to figure out where to go: A janitor closet just off stage right wing slightly backstage as well.
    I grabbed her hand as Wolf Hoffman's scorching guitar solo blazed away yet another few DBs of future hearing loss.
    Was about to clear past security with her in tow, a guy comes up from behind us and says
    " Hey where you going ?!" to her.
    She says " none of your ****in business!"
    I'm in like Flint now.
    Security begins to part the barricade for us.

    The guy yells "Your not going anywhere!" putting his hand on her shoulder,
    Turning to me he announces: " She's my girlfriend".
    She yells back 'No I'm not ! **** You !" pulling his arm off of her shoulder.

    Now security, who knows me, is about to pounce on the guy. They usually have our backs and we got theirs when crew is in the crowd.(most of the time)
    With bimbo in hand I start to move around to said destination of momentary lust. Suddenly i realize the band has stopped playing.
    Crap ! If I can make it to the door of eternal pleasure without anyone else noticing I'll be home free,
    and I wouldn't feel too guilty about being delayed for load out. This due to the unwritten rule of 'If your suddenly "occupied" at load out you'll be covered for a few minutes" but only a few minutes though ! It's a time honored tradition of crew unity as you would do the same for your co worker as well.

    I grab the doorknob and suddenly feel an iron vise grip on my shoulder,
    "Where are you going Stuie?"
    "Humunah, Humanah, ah ummm" was all I could manage.
    " The stage is this way " My crew chief grunted out as he pulled me up the stairs on stage leaving my erotic desire behind, she looking quite perplexed.
    To my disbelief our crew chief was not displaying any sort of crew unity at this moment.

    As i looked back, bimbo now realizes she's backstage anyhow and takes off for Dressing room hallway parts unknown !
    Self professed 'boyfriend ' is getting bounced out like a beachball.

    Me ? well i worked load out as fast as I could. Hoping perhaps there might some lonely 'music fan' outside . But all I came out to was a bum lying on the sidewalk and the exhaust of the tour buses as they pulled away to yet another city.
    Woe was me......
  2. anderbass


    Dec 20, 2005
    Phoenix. Az.
    Cool story!