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The spark for me in my current band is gone...Need advice :/

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by gregstj114, Aug 13, 2012.

  1. Hello fellow TB members,

    I'm in need of some advice of my current situation with my current (very first) band. I've been with them for four years since this past July, and all the great "plans" we had for this summer were shot. We all had high hopes of playing out at local shows and recording our debut album in a professional studio. Instead we're going to remaster our old two year old EP, but haven't meet up in two months. But somethings just don't work out and I'm aware that the guys in my band work and are going back to school in the fall. I completely understand if that's a problem with our band! And just today we were invited to play a local show by another band we talk to, and the other guys said we should do JUST cover songs, since we haven't practiced our original material and we wanted the experience of playing a gig. I opposed that idea because IMO, original songs would be a better choice to showcase what kind of band we are.

    But for me, the spark is gone and I'm becoming extremely bored with the lack of not meeting up and rehearsing for almost two months. It's a good thing I have a social life outside my band lol. But the thing is...I'm leaning towards quitting and finding different opportunities, but I'm generally a nice guy and don't want to hurt peoples feelings. So to the professionals who have done this many times I bet, what should I do that is a benefit to me? The other guys are serious and totally committed, but I have different ideas and just not feeling it anymore.

  2. Marginal Tom

    Marginal Tom

    Apr 28, 2010
    O'Fallon, IL
    You didn't say whether or not you're working this summer or going back to school in the fall, but it doesn't matter. This band already has a toe tag on it. Perhaps in a few years you can have a "reunion" gig. It's time to move on.
  3. bassinplace


    Dec 1, 2008
    Best to tell them how you're feeling and give your resignation. Don't string them and yourself along.
  4. I'm taking part in a 5 month work program and I'm going back to school in the late winter/spring. Sorry about that!
  5. craig.p


    Sep 28, 2008
    New Hampshire
    Just look for other opportunities without quitting this band. Start treating this band as sub work, and go look for a full-time band that rehearses and works regularly. My point is that you don't need to formally cut the cord before you go looking for other opportunities.
  6. You're right, it wouldn't be fair to them and me to play along if it's done for me. This sounds weird, but it would be very nerve racking for me to give them my resignation. They're good guys, but I have the feeling that if I'm out, they won't want to talk to me since I'm not a band member. We all never hung out in a non-band setting, only at band practice for the most part.
  7. This is also very true! The work program I'm in has me do some music-related activities. I worked with an actual working band as a temporary roadie and I could also be working with other musicians in open mics as well. The opportunities are endless!
  8. bluewine

    bluewine Banned

    Sep 4, 2008
    Was this ever an active band where you were rehearsing and gigging on a regular basis?
  9. No it never was...only had one actual show when we were in high school (talent show). It's always been rehearsing every Friday nights.
  10. seanm

    seanm I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize! Supporting Member

    Feb 19, 2004
    Ottawa, Canada
    To be honest, it sounds like the band is dead already. Do you really need to do anything? And, no, that is not a rhetorical question. If you feel you need to finish it, do it. But otherwise, I would just let it slide. How's that for wishy washy advice? :p
  11. It makes clear since and it's funny lol. It's definitely dead to me but the other guys are trying to keep it going...
  12. Lee H

    Lee H

    Nov 30, 2011
    Redding CA
    why don't you try playing the other show. Covers or not, you will likely benefit from the stage time. it does not mean you have to do covers forever. it just means you get to play, not just talk about being in a band
  13. That's always true. Stage time experience would definitely be a great thing for me to have. Looking at that in a positive way is definitely not a bad idea.
  14. Winfred


    Oct 21, 2011
    Quit, find another band. It'll be the next band of the dozens you will probably be in during your lifetime.

    You've been with those guys 4 years and you've played one gig. If you really want to play out, find another band, or two.

    And yes, stay positive. It's just a band.
  15. TinIndian


    Jan 25, 2011
    Micco Florida
    Honestly to me it sounds more like a bunch of guys that jam together than a band so much. 1 gig in 4 years. I'd go and find something else to do with a regularly gigging band or like minded individuals to do the same. You can always jam with your original guys when the chance comes along.
  16. bluewine

    bluewine Banned

    Sep 4, 2008
    Ok, then this was never really a band, it was a bunch of guys getting togther to jam and sounds like not much regularity with that either.

    What do you want, do you want to be in a a working band that is gigging every weekend?
  17. I would love to be in a band that is actually playing out often! This band I'm in plays experimental rock and alternative rock, but I'm more into punk rock, hard rock, and heavy metal. Sometimes I jam with a few great friends (2 guitarists and a drummer) who love the same music as I do and we were talking about getting something started. That's always a possibility?
  18. Yeah I'm also realizing that this is what is was all this time. I actually do have three other friends who love the same music as I do and we all wanted to start something. Just need a singer lol.
  19. A few days ago I saw a status a local band posted on Facebook saying they needed to find a new bassist. And they live in the same area as me lol. They're always getting gigs and I do believe they've recorded. I'm always keeping my eyes posted on either Facebook or CL.
  20. MNAirHead

    MNAirHead Supporting Member


    I wouldn't quit... just let it fizzle out...

    sounds like it's not a priority for any of you.

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