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The teens can't have all the angst threads...

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Matthew Bryson, Feb 3, 2004.

  1. Matthew Bryson

    Matthew Bryson Guest

    Jul 30, 2001
    I'm so dumb today - I managed to come to work with out bringing any lunch or my wallet with me. I also failed to eat breakfast before leaving the house this morning. I have no food, no money, no credit cards, no check book - and I'm HUNGRY! Anybody know of any common office supplies that might be edible? I know that kids used to chew / eat paper in elementary school. I'd grab a new ream of paper, not just grab used stuff from the recycle. This Paper Mate brand correction fluid warns against intentionally concentrating and inhaling the vapors but doesn't seem to warn against ingesting it. :meh: I wonder if it has any flavor? ┬ůand these white Magic Rub erasers are pretty soft, they might be like chewing on Gummy Bears (minus the flavor of course) ┬ůseriously, I think I'm going to make a pot of coffee and drink it with cream and sugar, it seems to be a little more "filling" that way as opposed to black how I usually drink it. Maybe if I go out to my car I could scavenge enough change from under the seats to get something from a vending machine. I'd kill for a bag of microwave popcorn right now. Oh, the humanity :bawl: ...could somebody send the Whaaa-ambulance, please?
  2. I've managed to not have a girlfriend nor any girls that are friends for like 5 months. My life is worse than yours.
  3. Matthew Bryson

    Matthew Bryson Guest

    Jul 30, 2001
    I will trade you my wife for a pizza right now, I swear to God I would...
  4. rickbass

    rickbass Supporting Member

    Tell the Office Supplies person you need 10 felt-tip markers then sniff the s**t out of them............you'll forget all about hunger..............but you may end up asking a fax machine for a date.
  5. Figjam


    Aug 5, 2003
    Boston, MA
    1.5 years. I have one female friend that i like but shes had a bf the whole time. I win.
  6. Sorry about that post, I saw angst so I had to post my angst :hyper:
  7. UnsungZeros

    UnsungZeros The only winning move is not to play.

    My whole life. I win.
  8. Matthew Bryson

    Matthew Bryson Guest

    Jul 30, 2001
    Uh, guys - I haven't eaten food sense dinner last night, I think I win!?
    Girls shmirls, I'll bet you both had lunch - probably breakfast too. We need to focus on what's important here ...and that is: I'm hungry! and I'm getting cranky. I've taken to sniffing ink pens per some questionable advice I received online and so far all it's got me is a black nose - the fax machine is barely acknowledging that I'm in the room. But I'm just going to play hard to get and maybe she'll come around... -sniff-sniff- ...hey, maybe if she does like me she'll take me out to dinner :hyper: -sniff- doggone stuck up fax machine... -sniff-

  9. oh so now are you making fun of me? THAT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE!!!!
  10. jive1

    jive1 Commercial User

    Jan 16, 2003
    Owner/Retailer: Jive Sound
    Dude, just ask someone at the office if you can borrow some cash for something to eat. But, if that's not an option, hmmm.....

    -Stand out on the corner and beg for spare change for food. You won't be lying. Or hold out a sign that says "Will Work for Food, left wallet at home. God Bless"

    -Mix up some coffee creamer and water, and then take some coffee and burn it till it becomes solid. Then you can create some type of synthetic coffee cereal.

    -Go to the store you go to regularly when at work and tell the person at the counter your story. Maybe they'll extend you credit for one day.

    -Go home! Leave work Early! Best option
  11. do any pizza places take paypal?
  12. Zon Bass

    Zon Bass

    Jan 20, 2002
    Dallas, TX
    Big deal, I've managed that for 17 years
  13. Coutts_is_god

    Coutts_is_god Guest

    Dec 29, 2003
    Windsor, Ont, Canada
    I wait to long before making my move then the girls become friends while I have feelings for them, and they come to me with their damn problems with out asking about mine or how i feel about them.
    I WIN!!!

    Plus steel someones lunch stupis
  14. Figjam


    Aug 5, 2003
    Boston, MA
    Dont you get a lunch break? Do you have time to go home?
  15. Matthew Bryson

    Matthew Bryson Guest

    Jul 30, 2001
    No, I commute 2 hours (one way) to and from work everyday. There is not time to go home at lunch.
    I asked a co-worker if he had any cash I could borrow, but I struck out on that.

    I like Jive1's idea of just going home.

    Adding insult to injury: just a bit ago, I felt the need to spit so I walked over to the trash can located in the office kitchenette. When I spat, I noticed that my spittle was going to hit the discarded wrapper of somebodies energy bar. When the wad of spit hit the wrapper, I realized it was not an empty wrapper at all! I checked. Open, one bite gone. Somebody obviously didn't like it. It looked good to me. It is Carmel flavored and covered in chocolate and packed full of protein and vitamins. I thought about it. I considerd my position. i considered how it was that I found it. It probably has more of my spit on it than theirs, right? I thought of an old episode of Seinfeld: below the rim = refuse.
    It came down to this - if asked the question "Have you ever eaten from a trash can or dumpster?" I want to be able to answer honestly that I never have. Unless youy guy say that it's no big deal, because it's still in there...
  16. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Hey man.....where you working? I'll bring ya something if you aren't too far from me. I'm in Lacey.

    Seriously.....You won't have to give up your wife either. I got one already. One bill is enough :D

  17. Matthew Bryson

    Matthew Bryson Guest

    Jul 30, 2001
    Well I should be coming through Lacey about 6:20 or so depending on traffic. So this wife of yours - is she a good cook? What time do y'all usually have dinner? ;)

  18. ive done that plenty times. at the park, tourists throw away a whole bunch of good stuff that their little kids wont eat. its not a big deal, except for all of the cooties. but seriously, its not a big deal.
  19. Coutts_is_god

    Coutts_is_god Guest

    Dec 29, 2003
    Windsor, Ont, Canada
    I'll bring 2 pizzas if i could have your Wife

    serously J/K i think
  20. Against Will

    Against Will Supporting Member

    Dec 10, 2003
    Big Sound Central
    At the rate I'm going, I'll never be a ninja assassin.

    This my first time out of bed in 18 days, since I realized that.

    I would proclaim "I win", but I'm too depressed to.

    Oh, and the world doesn't understand me. I'm a "me" kind of guy, in a "Other people" era.

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