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The Ten Commandments Of Bass Amp Ownership

Discussion in 'Amps and Cabs [BG]' started by MIJ-VI, May 1, 2009.

  1. MIJ-VI

    MIJ-VI Banned Supporting Member

    Jan 12, 2009
    The Ten Commandments Of Bass Amp Ownership:

    1) Thou shalt RTFM. :D
  2. Thingus995


    May 30, 2008
    2) Thou shalt drown the gui****ist

    3) Thou shalt be able to score on ones rig
  3. Knifedge


    Jan 24, 2009
    4)Thou shalt not let gui****s touch thy rig to change sound or to turn down
    5) Thou shalt not kill gui**** whom toucheth thy rig, just breaketh his fingers
  4. johnk_10

    johnk_10 vintage bass nut Supporting Member Commercial User

    Feb 16, 2008
    Thousand Oaks, CA
    John K Custom Basses
    6) thou shalt play comfortably loud at least once per day. ("give us this day, our daily bass")
  5. Knifedge


    Jan 24, 2009
    *and for give us our Truss, basses*
  6. johnk_10

    johnk_10 vintage bass nut Supporting Member Commercial User

    Feb 16, 2008
    Thousand Oaks, CA
    John K Custom Basses
    *and those that use bass against us*
  7. Knifedge


    Jan 24, 2009
    *and lead gui**** us not into temptation, four string delivers us from evil*
  8. levis76

    levis76 Seconds from getting ba...

    Apr 14, 2007
    Metro Detroit
    7) Thou shalt lock it in the pocket and provide all with foundation who hath none
    8) Thou shalt follow thy drummer and not stray from his beat nor his groove
  9. JanusZarate

    JanusZarate Low End Avenger Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 21, 2006
    San Francisco, CA, USA
    9) Thou shalt honor thy amp with a good cabinet.
    10) Thou shalt learn to appreciate the mids, or thou shalt not be heard in the mix. :)
  10. There's a FM?!!! :eek:

    Man, that would have been nice to know 20 YEARS AGO!!! :ninja:
  11. RickenBoogie


    Jul 22, 2007
    Dallas, TX
    Well, that's 10.
  12. *hallowed be thy bass line*
  13. sarcastro83


    Jul 27, 2007
    Toronto, ON
    what about thou shalt not scoopeth thy mids?
  14. BurningSkies

    BurningSkies CRAZY BALDHEAD Supporting Member

    Feb 20, 2005
    Seweracuse, NY
    Might as well get this over with....

    The Lord is my drummer; I shall not rush.
    He maketh me to rest in tasteful spots;
    He leadeth me beside cool meter changes;
    He restoreth my "one".
    He leadeth me in the right repeats
    For His name's sake.

    Yea, though I read through the trickiest road maps,
    I will fear no train wrecks;
    For You are with it;
    Your ride and Your snare, they comfort me.

    You setteth up a solo for me
    In the presence of mine guitarists;
    You annointeth my lines with drive;
    My groove overflows.

    Surely good feel and swing will follow me
    All the tunes of each set;
    And I will dwell in the pocket
    The whole gig long.
  15. basss

    basss Supporting Member

    Aug 27, 2001
    This is my P bass.

    There are many like it, but this one is MINE.

    My P bass is my best friend. It is my life.

    I must master it as I must master my life.

    My P bass without me is useless. Without my P bass, I am useless.

    I must play my P bass true.

    I must play louder than my guitaris who is trying to drown me.

    I must drown him before he drowns me. I will...

    My P bass and myself know that what counts in music is not the notes we play,

    the noise of our notes, nor the bass faces we make.

    We know it is the groove that counts. We will groove...

    My P bass is human, even as I, because it is my life.

    Thus, I will learn it as a brother.

    I will learn its weaknesses, its strengths, its parts, its accessories,
    its frets, and its neck.

    I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage.

    I will keep my P bass clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready.

    We will become part of each other. We will...

    Before God I swear this creed.

    My P bass and myself are the defenders of my groove.

    We are the masters of our band.

    We are the saviors of my life.

    So be it, until there is no enemy, but GROOVE.
  16. dhomer

    dhomer Commercial User

    Apr 9, 2009
    Hickory Corners, MI
    Owner, Gigmaster Soundworks, Auth. greenboy designs builder, MI
    -- thou shalt invest in a pickup truck and a two-wheeled dolly.. because...

    ... thou shalt not find a rig that will reproduce lowF# @120dB and fit in the back seat of a Honda..
  17. Adam Bomb

    Adam Bomb

    Mar 26, 2008
    Bezerkely, CA
    OK, that is the coolest thing I have read today

    --Bomb :bassist:

    And then like if a bass player snapped he would be all like, "Point! One! Zero! Five! Round! Wound! E!"
  18. jbassbob

    jbassbob Supporting Member

    Mar 21, 2005
    Boise ID
    Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors bass. ;)
  19. skeptikal


    Jan 24, 2008
    Fort Wayne, IN
    * for thine is the tone, and the groove, and the attack, forever and ever *
  20. Vic Winters

    Vic Winters Supporting Member

    Apr 20, 2006
    Rochester, NY
    I would think the first one would be

    For tubes: 'Thou shall not turn on a tube amp without a speaker load'.
    For SS: 'Thou shall not go below the minimum impedance'.

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