The world´s funniest joke!

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Ívar Þórólfsson, Oct 3, 2002.

  1. Ívar Þórólfsson

    Ívar Þórólfsson Mmmmmm... Supporting Member

    Apr 9, 2001
    Kopavogur, Iceland
    Here´s a link to a story which tells the funniest joke in the world!

    Since this is not Bass humor then I´ll stick this here in OT :)

    My favorite from this article is this one:

    A patient says, "Doctor, last night I made a Freudian slip, I was having dinner with my mother-in-law and wanted to say: 'Could you please pass the butter?'

    "But instead I said: 'You silly cow, you have completely ruined my life.'"
  2. I did like the Scottish one about, "I want to die peacefully like my grandfather..."

    But, the report did verify something all of us here at TB already know, if you want to make an animal joke funny, make it a duck. Shall we revive that thread?

    Hey Canadians, laugh more! :D

    Mike J.
  3. I was laughing out loud at the first one. And I loved the one with the weasels. :D
  4. erik II

    erik II

    Jul 11, 2000
    Oslo, Norway
    Yeah, the weasel joke... :D

    I visited laughlab and found another good one:

    Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars.
    During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."
    Watson says: "I see millions of stars, and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."
    Holmes replies: "Watson, you idiot. Somebody stole our tent ..."
  5. SuperDuck


    Sep 26, 2000
    Amen to that.

    My favorite is:

    TEXAN: "Where are you from?"

    HARVARD GRAD: "I come from a place where we do not end our sentences with prepositions."

    TEXAN: "OK -- where are you from, jackass?"
  6. Brendan


    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    I thought that was the best of the bunch...maybe because I'm an english freak though.
  7. from my experience as a canadian, we make some sick jokes and find them hilarious(dead baby jokes were quite popular for some time). for instance:

    Q. whats easier to pick up, a pile of bricks or a pile of dead babies?
    A. the babies, cause you can use a pitchfork.

    now, thats funny.
  8. haplo07

    haplo07 Guest

    Apr 13, 2002
    Tinley Park, IL
    yeah the weasels was a classic. only when my g/f send it to me it was bikers and an loud old man, it was the grandmother that was screwed instead of the mother and it was the guys grandfather that was drunk. funny the variations you can find on a joke.
  9. Hategear

    Hategear Workin' hard at hardly workin'.

    Apr 6, 2001
    Appleton, Swissconsin
    "50 dollars, same as in town."
  10. JMX

    JMX Vorsprung durch Technik

    Sep 4, 2000
    Cologne, Germany
    well, well, well, who would've thought that... :D
  11. Brad Barker

    Brad Barker Supporting Member

    Apr 13, 2001
    berkeley, ca

    wow, i must really suck (moreso than i'm told, anyway). i thought that was funny.
  12. Brad Barker

    Brad Barker Supporting Member

    Apr 13, 2001
    berkeley, ca
    how about this one, guys:

    "MR Pigs
    MR not Pigs
    OIC. MR Pigs"

    my math teacher from middle school inexplicably burst in my english class and wrote that on the board.

    when she said the "punchline" (reading it correctly-think "CDB"), i asked for my five minutes back.

    awful, awful "joke."
  13. Brad Barker

    Brad Barker Supporting Member

    Apr 13, 2001
    berkeley, ca
    if i were an english freak (on a proof-reading kick, no less), i would do this:

    "I thought that was the best of the bunch. Maybe that is because I am an English freak, though."

    but i won't.
  14. It's very simple actually, since all the funniest people in the world are Canadians (Colin Mochrie, Mike Myers, Jim Carrey etc...) we just have higher standards for laughter. :p

    I really like the Texan - Harvard Grad joke, and the Freudian slip was also really good.
  15. cheeseman


    Feb 3, 2002
    Austin, TX
    I may not be canadian, but I thought that was funny. Maybe I should be Canadian. :p
  16. Wownirvana


    Jul 7, 2002
    Athens, GA
    My friend Joseph went off to college and came back with a failing grade for his first semester and lots of dead baby jokes. Here are a few:
    Whats red and white and crawls all over?
    A baby with forks in its eyes!

    Whats orange and white and at the bottom of the pool?
    A baby with its floaties cut!

    Whats green and orange and white and at the bottom of the pool?
    That same baby three weeks later!

    I know its sick but hey...yeah
  17. Brad Barker

    Brad Barker Supporting Member

    Apr 13, 2001
    berkeley, ca
    hey, better cool it with those baby jokes, alright?

    last time that happened...well...let's just say we're lucky that xavierG still goes here.
  18. Dumfish


    Oct 6, 2001
    Santa Rosa, Ca
    OMG, the Texan and Harvard Grad one is by far my favorive.

  19. Just goes to show you that Henny Youngman was know all over the world.