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This is bothering the heck out of me...

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Waffles and Scotch, Aug 8, 2012.


  1. This morning while walking to my car I saw 2 people, a man and a woman, standing in the road. Upon further inspection there was a man lying on the ground, and the woman was holding his head up. I asked if they needed help, to which the woman replied that the guy on the ground had a siezure and hit his head, and that an ambulance was already on the way. She asked if I knew him, and I replied that I didn't (I only know a couple of people in my apartment complex, and he wasn't one of them).

    With an ambulance on the way, and not having any medical training, there wasn't anything I could do but stand there and watch (like the guy, holding his dog, was doing), so I got in my car and headed to work.

    What bothers me, though, is the look the guy gave me as I was driving off. Something in between sad and disgusted. Like "how can you leave someone lying in the road like this?" I've asked several people, including my girlfriend (who does have some medical training), and everyone agrees I did the right thing, as it certainly wouldn't have helped the situation to stand there and watch. Like the guy with his dog was doing. And if I was lying on the ground having a siezure I wouldn't want a bunch of people standing around staring at me. But I just can't shake the feeling that I did something wrong...

    Thoughts? Would you have stayed and been a spectator (for lack of a better word), or left?
     
  2. If there was nothing that you would be able to add to the situation, I think you did the right thing. If you had been a witness to the incident, then maybe you should have stayed to help inform the EMTs as to what had happened, but if the situation was relatively under control, then there would be no sense in you rubbernecking.
     
  3. Keano

    Keano

    Dec 14, 2010
    Northern Virginia
    There's little point in staying around. I wouldn't make much of whatever the look the guy gave you. If anything, drawing an unnecessary crowd seems the less ideal thing to do.
     
  4. What you should do is try and get some first aid training.

    If there was only one or two other people there, I'd say you should have stayed. Sometimes helps to have more hands for getting in touch with the emergency services/seeing if you can get a first aider (or better)/getting something as simple as getting a blanket to cover him or throwing your jacket under his head.

    If there is a fairly large amount of people there, then yeah, leave. Either that or try to disperse them if nobody has any form of help they can provide. Certainly no point in a useless crowd forming around to have a gawk.

    I've posted about it a couple times before, but I'll repeat it, first aid training saves lives. You can do a heck of a lot to help, with minimum training, in the time between finding someone injured and the professionals arriving. Those first few minutes can be critical. I was lucky enough to get training through my work (it was only a 3 day course, which seems to be fairly standard), but there are also many other ways to get free or cheap training (heck, most employers will offer training here and there).
     
  5. If you stood around, you could've been in the way or been taking up someone with medical training's space to save him.
     
  6. Yeah, he was breathing and being cradled by the woman there (who obviously had some training), and the guy was just standing there staring, so I figured they had things under control....

    I agree, and this is something I'm planning on doing.
     
  7. colcifer

    colcifer Esteemed Nitpicker Supporting Member

    Feb 10, 2010
    A Galaxy Far, Far Away
    You didn't have anything to contribute so why stay? You're good.
     
  8. MatticusMania

    MatticusMania LANA! HE REMEMBERS ME!

    Sep 10, 2008
    Pomona, SoCal
    I agree with previous posters... no need to stick around.
     
  9. i'm sure a guy having a seizure wants to wake up to 77 strangers surrounding him staring.. probably scare the p*** out of him considering he's going to be very groggy and disoriented when he comes out of it
     
  10. I seriously doubt he was disgusted with you. Having someone close to me who has seizures, it takes an hour or so for them to get back into some sort of normal state, so, it's not you, it's them. I realize how it can feel, because I've been there. You did the right thing.
     
  11. viper4000

    viper4000

    Aug 17, 2010
    Charlotte
    I have a lot of first aid training, and in the same circumstance I would have left as well.

    The nice lady was already there protecting the man in case the episode continued. They also told you the squad was on the way. The only thing you would be doing is getting in the way.

    Your conscience should be clear.
     
  12. It wasn't the guy having the siezure, it was the guy watching this go down that was staring at me. He didn't look too bright, so I'm on the fence as to whether he was sad about what happened, or upset with me for leaving. But regardless, I felt horrible on my drive in.
     
  13. Thanks for this. Guess I needed some reinforcement from other folks as reading that made me feel a whole lot better...
     
  14. Just out of interest, based on another posters response. Who was it that gave you the look? When I first read it I was assuming it was the guy with his dog who was also just standing there.

    If it was the guy who had siezed, then I totally agree with the other poster, people who are having/just had a siezure aren't all there straight off the bat and I don't think for a second he'd be disgusted!
     
  15. I mean..you did what I assume 90% of people wouldn't do: you stopped and asked.
     
  16. viper4000

    viper4000

    Aug 17, 2010
    Charlotte
    To give you a personal anecdote, I was in a similar situation recently. A lady literally drove her car into the side of the gas station I was inside of. I was the first person to realize something happened (as in, no, it was not thunder). I ran outside and saw a woman that just took a face full of airbag and was very disoriented. I checked her vitals as best I could. Realized quickly she had at least a minor concussion and was going into shock. I prevented her from getting out of her car, as you never know the extent of injuries.

    By this time, at least 10 people, including the shop manager and owner, were hovering over the scene. I verified the squad was called. Another lady walked up and said she was a nurse. I explained what I saw, and she "took over" after corroborating my findings. I left the scene as I was just going to be in the way.

    I returned later after work, as it is the closest station to my house, and the owner was very appreciative that I was there when this happened. He had to ill feeling toward me for leaving. The lady was okay considering and she was released from the hospital with a minor concussion. She actually left a thank you card at the station for the employees and customers that helped her.

    tldr - Waffles - You're good man.
     
  17. Funky Ghost

    Funky Ghost Translucently Groovy

    I've handled several dozen seizure events in my line of work. You did what was morally required of you and made the right choice to move on. Having a crowd around when a person who is in the recovery phase can cause problems. Not always, but the risk is there.

    I would not be surprised to learn the other male was a friend and was probably looking/hoping for someone to help his friend. If they happened to be folks with disabilities then that feeling was probably amplified. Seeing a seizure can be traumatic and knowing what to do after one is often baffling to most folks. I wouldn't take that "look" as anything other than a person who was also looking for help.
     
  18. Steve

    Steve

    Aug 10, 2001
    Ok...as an ex paramedic..there is no intervention for a seizure. It happens, it passes. All you can really do is protect the airway and that apparently was being done. Most of the old wives tails people think they know like tongue swallowing and other BS actually do more harm than good.

    Everyone's first rule should be "Do no harm" If you don't know what to do, do nothing. Please.

    If you want to do something, take a basic first responder / first aid course. There actually are things you can do that will honest to God save a life without much training.

    Learn CPR correctly, learn the Heimlich correctly, learn how to effectively stop an arterial bleed. learn how to protect an airway and C-spine...you can truly make a difference.
     
  19. Having to see someone you love endure a seizure is probably one of the worst things ever. There's no stopping it, no time frame for an end, etc. It. Seriously. Blows.
     
  20. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Terrific Twister

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    I would have stayed until the paramedic arrived, and stood there. Why? To keep others from crowding around and let them know the situation so the woman tending to the man could keep doing that instead of needing to explain to other passersby what the situation was.

    No judgement on you at all W&S. I see no harm in how you handled it. Don't let the other guys look on his face get to you. Sometimes people have a look on their face they are not aware of, and we as humans can interpret it incorrectly.

    -Mike
     

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