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"Threatened of being fired" thread update...so, pt 2...? Some more recent bollocks from the BL...

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by addylewis, Apr 22, 2019.


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  1. Ooooh yes...these are good...

    Last rehearsal - told him I was getting my guitars fixed up (I've been playing/enjoying them (6-strings) more recently...) and he moaned about the fact I was spending money on them rather than getting my backup amp fixed...then moaned about some baccy dust falling out of my coat pockets (both at the last gig AND the rehearsal we'd just done) because the pockets don't have zips on them. I just told him "Well, my coat wasn't THERE when I took it off before..." - I think we can guess who might've moved it/caused it to fall out...

    Gig the other night - unwrapped my new pedal, flicked a switch and the volume temporarily went through the roof...had a go at me in case I blew my amp and the gig would be over (nothing to do with how much it'd cost me to actually get it fixed or anything)...then told me to turn down during soundcheck because "it's feeding back enough without that" (did I mention he won't put me through the rig because he blames me for blowing a sub back in 2009...? ...so I HAVE to have the amp cranked?)

    (I nearly told him to eff off/walked away at the first comment...I can't remember what it was exactly, but he wasn't exactly nice...)

    After the gig he kept trying to drum into me about how I've become more aggressive (I'm actually not...I can't really look at him without scowling/frowning nowadays though) and about the Squier thing, and why he picks on me - I told him he was an arsehole. Ok, whilst he's giving me a lift home it's probably NOT the best time to call him that - but...well, he IS an arsehole nowadays. He also doesn't want me to keep "hounding" the Elvis band drummer to join my originals band...I don't hound the guy, but if he's really not bothered about helping them out for a couple of gigs whilst we find someone permanent he can tell me himself can't he?

    He was basically saying "Stay for the gigs we've got booked then you can go" - It's probably painfully obvious at this point that I'm quite tired of/apathetic about the bands...

    One good thing though - I took both my Squier and Jaguar to the gig, then changed over partway through soundcheck at his request...guess what...the sound was exactly the same! :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::hyper::hyper::bassist::bassist: (pleased about that!) Even better - I used the pedal through most of the second set and he didn't even notice I had it on...errm…"The Squier doesn't sound as good mate...? You couldn't even tell I used overdrive so the bottom end disappeared...you MIGHT'VE noticed if I'd been through the P.A..."
     
    EatS1stBassist likes this.
  2. RustyAxe

    RustyAxe

    Jul 8, 2008
    Connecticut
    I’d quit on the spot if a BL ever said that to me. I’ve never been so in need of gigs that I’d suffer insufferable blowhards. “Better line up a new player dude right soon ... cuz I’m gone as of yesterday”.
     
  3. catcauphonic

    catcauphonic High Freak of the Low Frequencies Supporting Member

    Mar 30, 2012
    Seattle WA
    I'm not sure what baccy dust is
     
    Rebel Rocker and jmone like this.
  4. The scraggy, dried up tobacco powder that you normally keep in your rolling tin after pulling the loose bits from the end of rolled cigarettes...some of it sometimes falls out of the tin whilst it's in my pocket so there's loads in there which could fall out if my coat isn't held upright because there's no zip on the pocket...
     
  5. catcauphonic

    catcauphonic High Freak of the Low Frequencies Supporting Member

    Mar 30, 2012
    Seattle WA
    Reads like he's looking (& really reaching) for things to hassle you about at this point. I did catch the first thread, and I'd like to think that I'd just walk away by now with my middle finger in the air, but (A) I'm not sure what your music scene and prospects are like wherever you are, and (B) we've only got your side of things.

    Either way, I hope you can find peace with him (however unlikely), or move on to a better sitch fast
     
  6. I think it's pretty obvious he wants to see me get angry...considering I'm the only bassist he's ever been in a band with and I'm not an Elvis nut, surely he knows that he's lucky I'm still there doesn't he?

    If he were the same with the others it'd be more bearable...but the fact he's singling me out when I've been there with him since we were at college is bloody ridiculous - I dunno why he's doing it, if he wants to get a replacement or whatever...fine, but just tell me and I'll go, but don't have a major fall-out or physical bust-up for god's sake 'cos there's no need.

    I'd rather leave now to avoid it getting to the point of writing nasty songs about each other and having it be unbearable being in the same room...I think Ringo summed it up best: "In the beginning - the energy for the Beatles, we put in 1000%...but it was dwindling, "oh dear do we HAVE to turn up and do that thing again...? I wanna do this, John wants to do that..." ..." - that's how I've actually felt for awhile because it's too serious nowadays, but I still keep doing it because it's "some money from playing music in a band with a mate" but...my mate get's stressed, sometimes directs it at me, and I'm not really feeling the love anymore, y'know?
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2019
    Mr_Moo and EatS1stBassist like this.
  7. PauFerro

    PauFerro

    Jun 8, 2008
    United States
    The relationship has deteriorated. Not sure if it's history of your behavior, or the band leader has a personality where he likes to razz people because he knows it bothers him. Nonetheless, I'd be planning my exit as soon as possible. No band is worth my inner peace. And I have been in bands that have tried to rob it before.
     
    ELG60, MattZilla and DirtDog like this.
  8. catcauphonic

    catcauphonic High Freak of the Low Frequencies Supporting Member

    Mar 30, 2012
    Seattle WA
     
  9. Koshchei

    Koshchei

    Mar 17, 2019
    Peterborough, ON
    I'd quit immediately - no notice, no quarter. He's treating you like a disobedient child. I'm also guessing that there's a limited market for Elvis in Sheffield's under-70 crowd?
     
  10. JRA

    JRA my words = opinion Supporting Member

    reasons to stay:
    - it pays.
    - you're having some 'fun' with this drama.
    - you can't do any better.

    reasons to leave:
    - you have better, immediate (or 'doable') prospects.
    - you're too 'proud' for the BL's version of band culture.
    - you play too well to limit yourself (mental/emotional/artistic' energy) to this project.

    :D

    best of luck! :thumbsup:
     
    lo_freq_geek and ObsessiveArcher like this.
  11. DWBass

    DWBass The Funkfather

    Man..........you have a TON of patience! I would have been whipped his @$$ and rage quit the band!
     
  12. - that's why I'm doing it
    - it can be fun seeing him overreact, but it's getting beyond a joke now I'm being singled out because I'm choosing to use a Squier when nobody else does...I've not bothered with the fretless precision yet, but there's still time for that one if I suddenly think "That DOES it!!!!" at any point...:D:D
    - I'd rather be playing our own stuff again, the BL decided to change the band dynamic and it's become boring/tedious/too damn serious (on his part) for me...dare I mention the rehearsal space now MIGHT be free, but I'd rather pay to not have to get 2 busses and have an amp there already (there wasn't a discussion about it, just "we're gonna rehearse here now, it's free"...and that's what we've all gone along with - it's ground floor rather than 3rd floor, but otherwise I prefer the old place...it's in a dodgy area so we have to keep the gate locked which is a pain).

    I'm proud of how good we sound, but it's hardly challenging on my part (I don't dick around, I just get my head down and do it mostly right)


    - I've got a band doing their own stuff...not the best band I've been in tbh, they're a bit quiet/un-chatty, are incomplete at the moment, and don't rehearse weekly.
    - band culture is all well and good, but if his version of being "professional" is being a dick to the longest-serving bandmate at any given opportunity because he's using a Squier and wants to spend his OWN money on his OWN thing outside of the band...I think most people would be too proud to cope with that rubbish.
    - I'd not done many covers for a long time before starting this band. I enjoyed the first couple of rehearsals, but after that I realised I was playing the same thing more-or-less for everything...

    Cheers.

    I'm at the point where 2 bands (classing the Elvis double-band-with-same-members as one band) is starting to drain me...my originals band aren't complete and aren't that amazing - if I had to lose a band in order to get another better original-material band...no contest at this point.

    I seriously think I'd be happier either without ANY band for awhile...or if I could get something better than both. I grabbed the original-material band with both arms and held on when they offered me a place...I guess you would if you'd had nothing but Elvis every week for 6 months since your last non-Elvis band parted ways with you...
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2019
    JRA likes this.
  13. MattZilla

    MattZilla

    Jun 26, 2013
    CNY
    Part deux?! Quit already, mate! Both the band and the baccy!
     
    Mr_Moo, JoshS and whero like this.
  14. Koshchei

    Koshchei

    Mar 17, 2019
    Peterborough, ON
    Not to impugn the "King" or denigrate the virtues of eating whole watermelons stuffed with peanut butter and barbiturates before shuffling out on stage like a 350lb half-mummified mumble-crooning version of Liberace, but more than 5 minutes of Elvis is my idea of Hell. :D
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2019
    JaseyT likes this.
  15. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    At this point, you BOTH are being hard to get along with. It's only a matter of time before you're gone. He's the BL, not you. So if anybody goes it'll be you.

    He doesn't like you. You don't like him. Why do you stay?
     
    lfmn16, Munjibunga, Mr_Moo and 7 others like this.
  16. dan1952

    dan1952 Commercial User

    Jun 27, 2012
    Anderson IN
    Artist Endorsement with Supro Huntington Basses / Owner, Dan's Music, Inc..
    I'd have left before now. If I thought I wouldn't hurt my remaining good hand, I would probably do something stupid that affected his ability to chew his food...
    Okay, no physical violence, I take that back. I would leave. Immediately.
     
    jamro217 likes this.
  17. I'm not being hard to get along with...unless being hard to get along with is tolerating/trying to ignore more complaints directed at me (about crap which has got NOTHING to do with him) than at anyone else in the band - playing music which doesn't really inspire me, just so I can recoup some rehearsal/travel costs for the project and not be too out of pocket at the end of it?

    If anyone goes it'll be me - no poopie Sherlock...
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2019
    Mr_Moo and JaseyT like this.
  18. I was recently fired from a band that I should have quit long ago because of an overly opinionated and dramatic band leader. I'm currently having a blast in the originals metal band I started up, and last I spoke to the drummer from the old band, they're still trying to find a full time bassist since most of the other guys were smart enough to turn her down instead of sticking it out like me. If you aren't making money or having fun, I would say leave.
     
  19. Kmonk

    Kmonk

    Oct 18, 2012
    South Shore, Massachusetts
    Endorsing Artist: Fender, Spector, Ampeg, Curt Mangan, Nordstrand Pickups, Korg , Conquest Sound
    Sounds like you both have issues. You don't like each other it seems like you're both just trying to piss each other off. He's the BL so whether you like it or not, he calls the shots. The best thing to do is leave. In all honesty, I don't think I could play with either of you.
     
  20. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    You're bringing a bass he doesn't like, introducing new sounds he doesn't want, etc. Sure, he's being MORE of a jerk. But you aren't exactly going out of your way to stay in the good Grace's of the boss. And, make no mistake, a band leader is your boss. (That's why I won't work with one, unless it's a fill-in gig on my terms.)

    It's no different at all from working at a fast station or Food Lion. He's the boss. Do what he wants or get hassled. Get hassled enough and you're out.

    But you haven't answered my question. You hate the music. You hate the BL. You are looking for a fight as much as he is. I don't understand why you don't just leave instead of passive-aggressively venting about it here.

    Of course, you're ALLOWED to vent here. And we're here for you. But it doesn't seem to be getting you anywhere. You're just spinning wheels in this project. Why stay?
     
    Avigdor, kentiki, Sixgunn and 12 others like this.

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