Tips to improve your marriage or partnership that you have put in practice

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Icey101, Apr 11, 2012.

  1. Icey101

    Icey101 Guest

    Jun 22, 2011
    Australia Victoria
    ok i've seen a few posts on issues in relationships hence i thought this might be useful. The rule here is not suggest something that you have read in a magazine but something that has actually worked for you....

    heres a couple of simple ones i have used

    1. wiping and washing up, easy hey, well when the wife starts to wash up the odd pan or pot that might not fit into the dishwasher make sure you jump up to help, at the same time you will of course have to listen to her telling you about what happened during the day etc but its worth it and a simple token when i reall feeling like sitting and watching telly ok

    2.i also go for a push bike ride together, yeh well it adds a bit of exercise plus you will do a bit of listening at the same time, if she is going at it to much simply pull away a bit then drop back and change the subject :p

    3. heres something thats taken me 20 years to master, as soon as i walk in the door after a really hard days work when all i want to do is sit and put my feet up, well i have trained myself to stand and listen and look interested... to the wife off load all her issues during the day on me, even if they are nothing compared to what i have been through....i'll then add some supportive comments...then wander into the lounge and put the telly on....:smug:

    4. Another one is when its comes to soccer on the weekends with the kids i always get involved in helping out to run the team, like stepping up to refferee or assist the coach running the side line... the wife sees this as showing leadership to my kids and helping out she admires me for....ok

    so there you go it might not sound much but its the little things that count, happy wife happy life
  2. Call your wife beautiful every day.

  3. Don't act, don't pretend. If you can't be you it might be best to find someone new.
  4. Sav'nBass


    Jan 18, 2009
    Virginia Beach
    Never try to win an argument .... strive to get past them and find a way to make sure the hot points are addressed.. but not during the argument.

    Learn your wife... because I guarantee you she wont be that same woman you fell in love with and decided to marry .. that woman was her good twin.. the real her may show you glimpsews during the courtship.. but after the marriage she moves in with all her shtuff ....
  5. Icey101

    Icey101 Guest

    Jun 22, 2011
    Australia Victoria
  6. jarrydee

    jarrydee Guest

    Oct 22, 2011
    GET INTO A ROUTINE!!!! I can not say this enough. It may seem boring, but it works. Sure we will go for a bike ride or something like that, but we do our main living the same everyday, there are no surprises and, we are both happy and have been for a long time, but before this routine we would go to the bars and stuff like that and arguments would come out of nowhere, now if we have a disagreement we know exactly what it is about, no need to lie about anything and it is resolved in minutes! Don't get me wrong, there are times where just for a few minutes the anger seem unbearable, but it is gone fast. Find you routine, not mine but yours and it will make a 90% better difference! I hope this helps even one person! oh and don't forget to communicate, communication can make something that seemed so big to you become nothing at all when it is done with!
  7. Sandwich, beer, now.


  8. 1. Eat as many meals together as possible. Not in front of the TV, but at a table, with conversation.

    2. One cooks, the other cleans. Always.

    3. Assign household tasking appropriately - my wife doesn't mind doing laundry, but hates grocery shopping. I don't mind grocery shopping & hate doing laundry. She cleans the inside of the house, I do the outside / yardwork.

    4. Have relations as much as possible.
  9. I'm only a few years in which is bupkis compared to some folks here but here's my opinion..

    1) Communicate daily about everything affecting your lives from the most mundane to the most life-changing..

    2) Keep your fights clean and your makeup sex dirty.. not the other way around..

    3) Do something nice for each other every day.. this can be as small as putting on a pot of coffee in the morning.. just make sure your wife feels like you care about her and can see in the small things you do..

    4) Act as a team.. there will be many forces that will try and pit you against each other.. resist all of that and tackle the world together..

    That's all I've got but it's serving me pretty well so far..

    PS.. that time of the month comes most every month.. learn when it's due and prepare to exercise a little more patience for those couple days..
  10. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member Gold Supporting Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Some great suggestions guys, nice work.

    The wife and I make a point to never go to bed upset/angry/mad at each other. We are really tuned into each other where we can tell if the other is mad about something and it only takes some brief talking to get it out and cleared up.

    I value my wifes opinion and thoughts as much as my own, and as corny as this may sound, she is precious in my eyes and heart.

  11. Balog


    Mar 19, 2009
    Everett, WA
    Two are pre-qualifications...

    Marry someone you respect. I see so many guys complaining about having to talk to their wives... why the hell would you vow to spend the rest of your life with someone if you don't enjoy their company?

    Marry someone who is dedicated to the relationship itself. If all you have is feelings of love/lust for each other, when the hard times come (and they do for everyone) and those feelings aren't there, if both of you aren't devoted to working on the relationship it won't last.

    For things I've done inside the relationship..

    Figure out how the other persons communicates, how their thought processes work, and how they give and receive love. Make sure they know the same for you.

    Don't be afraid to talk to a counselor or other older/wiser person who A. you have respect for & B. has a successful track record in their own relatiosnhip. Too many folks let years of resentment and hurt build up, then dash off to get help when it's too late. Don't be that way.

    Be selfless, not selfish.
  12. Don't piss off the cook.
  13. Bting


    Dec 2, 2008
    Your kiss goodbye in the morning, and when you see each other again at night, should be no les than 5(real) seconds.

    Im not talking tongue, just 5 seconds to show you care.

    This makes a more intimate(not necessarily sexual) relationship.

    The quick peck is what you do to your mother/sister/grandmother, ect. Is your wife not worth a little extra?
  14. Never "win" an arguement, even if you are 100% right and you both know it.
    lways kiss her goodnight.
  15. ThudThudThud


    Jun 4, 2010
    * Make sure you leave the toilet seat down.
    * When she's complaining/griping/ranting, just listen. Do not try to 'fix' anything. That's not the point. I know you're itching to just take away the issue, but you'll be wrong.
    * Nothing is sexier, apparently, to a woman than a man vacuuming, cleaning the kitchen, mopping floors. Don't overdo it, but mark my words...
    * Listen (anagram of 'silent'). She'll slip stuff in there that she'll test you on later. Just kidding. :)help:)
    * Don't play 'silent treatment.' Talk it through.
    * Don't assume she thinks like you. Her idea of taking out the trash might be, "every day at four." Yours might be, "When it's full."
    Neither of you are wrong. Neither of you are right. The point is that you might get mad at each other based on unrealistic expectations of understanding each others' deadlines.
    * Give her the remote control. I know. I know. You may have to watch rubbish, but she'll appreciate you being supportive.
    * She's your best friend, right? If not, why not?
    * A bag of Jelly-Belly thrown into the groceries once a week scores more points than a box of chocolates once a month. Slip a couple bars of nice chocolate into the pantry for 'emergencies.'
    * No. You don't think she's fat. You think she's beautiful.
    * Make sure you randomly grab her and kiss her at least once a day. Hello/Goodbye kiss doesn't count.
    * Take her breakfast in bed once a month at least. Trust me.
    * Go out to eat together - even if it's just breakfast - at least once a month.

    Random gestures, like slipping a treat into the groceries, or cutting a flower from the garden, or breakfast in bed, or cleaning the windows without prompting are more bonding than grand gestures on special occasions. Good luck.
    Men are from Mars. Women are not from anywhere near this universe...

    She's your best friend, right?
  16. MatticusMania

    MatticusMania LANA! HE REMEMBERS ME!

    Sep 10, 2008
    Pomona, SoCal
    Stay single!
  17. Sixpack324

    Sixpack324 Guest

    Jan 10, 2012
    New Jersey
    Here's mine:

    1. Don't expect 50/50....Expect 70/30....If you expect to do will never be disappointed when it actually works out to be 50/50.

    2. Actually do all of the things you expect her to do......Want her to look sexy? Make sure you're in shape too. Need her to listen to your problems/rants/etc? You need to listen too.

    3. One word......Buttplug.

    4. There's lots of things I can't do. It's not that I physically can't do them....It's just that some things aren't in me. Cooking, for example. Laundry too. Realize that she's got those things too and make sure you do them. I don't even know how to turn on the washing machine or the dishwasher. My wife doesn't know what it is to wash a car, take the garbage out, take a car for an oil change, carry the laundry baskets to/from the laundry room, etc.

    5. I like it when she does something nice for me unexpectedly. I return the favor.

    6. Call her once in a while just to say you are thinking about her.
  18. hdracer


    Feb 15, 2009
    Elk River, MN.
    Stay on the road.
    The more you are apart the less chance you have of upsetting each other.
  19. BassyBill

    BassyBill Still here Gold Supporting Member

    Mar 12, 2005
    West Midlands UK
    The best thing I did with my last long term relationship was end it. So liberating.

    Not saying that would be ideal for everyone, of course. In fact, I think that in the right circumstances Mike has absolutely nailed it.
  20. Make your wife your standard of beauty. Than there will never be anyone more beautiful in the world.