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Unlocked iPhone Worthless After F.B.I. Spills Glass of Water on It

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Whousedtoplay, Mar 29, 2016.


  1. Whousedtoplay

    Whousedtoplay

    May 18, 2013
    TEXAS
    "WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Moments after successfully unlocking the San Bernardino iPhone, the F.B.I. rendered the phone permanently useless by spilling a glass of water on it, an F.B.I. spokesman confirmed on Tuesday.
    Calling the accident “one of the biggest embarrassments in F.B.I. history,” bureau spokesman Harland Dorrinson told reporters, “There’s no way to express how bad we feel about what happened to that phone.”
    Read here:
    Unlocked iPhone Worthless After F.B.I. Spills Glass of Water on It - The New Yorker
     
    47th Street likes this.
  2. There is no facepalm meme on the entire internet nearly powerful enough to express the facepalm-iness of this story.
     
    catcauphonic likes this.
  3. Matt O

    Matt O

    Feb 19, 2013
    The Mitten
    I won't ruin the fun...

    cough*Borowitzisacheapimitationoftheonion*cough
     
  4. There is no facepalm meme on the entire internet nearly powerful enough to express the facepalm-iness of my last post.
     
  5. And that's why I get mad when someone puts a drink on top of my amp.
     
    47th Street likes this.
  6. Gravedigger Dav

    Gravedigger Dav Supporting Member

    Mar 13, 2014
    Fort Worth, Texas
    The FBI cracked your amp? I didn't think that was possible.
     
    Aberdumbie, btmpancake and knumbskull like this.
  7. I call shenanigans!
     
    47th Street likes this.

  8. You should have seen the stories it told.;)
     
  9. Gravedigger Dav

    Gravedigger Dav Supporting Member

    Mar 13, 2014
    Fort Worth, Texas
    :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
    OMG, yeah, I'm sure.
    That scares me. Maybe I should trade mine in before it is too late.
     
    47th Street likes this.

  10. We're both doomed. LMAO
     
    Gravedigger Dav likes this.
  11. Biggbass

    Biggbass

    Dec 14, 2011
    Planet Earth
    Based on this news, if it was an FBI agent who came out of the bathroom at Louis' in The Godfather, intending to shoot Sollozzo & McCluskey, he would've had something other than his pistol in his hand.
     
    47th Street likes this.
  12. the harp unstrung

    the harp unstrung Humankind: be both. Gold Supporting Member

    Nov 2, 2014
    On The Bus
    N.A.
    My daughter turned me on to Andy Borowitz a few months ago. She called it her 'Thank's Da' gift for turning her on to The National Lampoon 25 yrs ago...
     
  13. 48thStreetCustom

    48thStreetCustom

    Nov 30, 2005
    Colorado
    Yeah, I'm calling bs.
     
    IconBasser likes this.
  14. No...there actually was a magazine called National Lampoon...
     
    GregC, ahc, geeza and 1 other person like this.
  15. "In a possible thawing of relations between Apple and the F.B.I., Apple C.E.O. Tim Cook offered to replace the damaged iPhone for seven hundred and forty-nine dollars, or two hundred and ninety-nine dollars with a two-year contract."

    : D
     
    GregC and 47th Street like this.
  16. the harp unstrung

    the harp unstrung Humankind: be both. Gold Supporting Member

    Nov 2, 2014
    On The Bus
    N.A.
    image.jpeg The most famous...though not nearly the only incredibly funny and groundbreaking hunk of comedy/parody... from the magazine I grew up on.
    I bought the magazine, so the dog survived!
     
    Aberdumbie likes this.
  17. I think the bureau hacked my bass, because everything I play sounds sloppy and off time, and it's clearly not user error.

    On an entirely unrelated note, would a tin foil hat and vest interfere with my wireless signal? Or can they hack that too?
     
  18. ahc

    ahc

    Jul 31, 2009
    No. Virginia
    Ask Chuck McGill.

    better-call-saul-chuck.jpg
     
    OldDog52 and TOOL460002 like this.
  19. Bob Clayton

    Bob Clayton My P doesn’t have flats or tort Staff Member Supporting Member

    Aug 14, 2001
    Philly Suburbs
    What gave that away, was it the "This post is news satire from The Borowitz Report."? ;)
     
    47th Street likes this.
  20. Primary

    Primary TB Assistant

    Here are some related products that TB members are talking about. Clicking on a product will take you to TB’s partner, Primary, where you can find links to TB discussions about these products.

     
    Nov 25, 2020

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