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Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by MAJOR METAL, Mar 1, 2005.
Please share your thoghts on the matter.
It's hard for me... I do really irrational things because of the way I'm feeling, and then I try to tell people that it was just the way i'm feeling, but they don't buy it. Why would they?
A reason maybe...but as an excuse it takes away responsibility. And there's no excuse for that.
Everyone has their bad days from time to time... I think it's a valid excuse as long as it isn't being used more than say, once a month.
No matter how bad of a mood I'm in, I still try to treat other people with respect. Using a bad mood as an excuse to be rude to others, which people seem to do often, is not appropriate to me.
I may be in a bad mood, but maybe the people around me are too and would benefit from me being pleasant with them. At least that's how I think of it.
As far as other behaviors go, I'm not sure. Mood plays a large role in what you choose to do, but sometimes you have to step back and try to be objective about what you're doing at the moment and why.
I try not to let my moods affect others around me, but it's really hard. I tend to speak my mind, and do it a lot of the time before thinking, so I can tend to piss people off easily and quickly.
On the other hand, nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.
My brother has a serious anger management problem, and half the time he says he's having a "bad day"
He's lying, he knows it, and I hate it.
Encourage him to get some help before it becomes a serious issue.
A good 65% of the time I'm either stressed/tired/otherwise perturbed. That doesn't give me license to go off on people. I don't think it's too much to treat people with respect and be receptive to them, especially when they are innocent 3rd parties who don't have anything to do with the my current condition.
Sometimes I slip, but I'm not proud when I do.
Moods are a genuine reason for behaving a certain way - but we can control our moods. Hence, hiding behind them is total BS. I know I let myself get angry at times because I get attention when I do. My ex used to cry over nothing because I'd come running to make her feel better. Moods are a reason but they aren't an excuse. You control the mood, you do the actions, you live the consequenes.
Do you think people wake up in Sh!t moods like "waking up on the wrong side of the bed" or is it something that triggers it after?.
I think it's something that's triggered for the most part by a combination of external factors... although I'm sure for some people it's a chemical imbalance or something.
Regardless, I agree with the above posters who say it's possible to control your mood no matter how it's caused, you just have to be strong enough to choose to do it.
I don't think you can really control your MOOD. You can control your actions, but not the mood you happen to be in.
Let's say for example, I'm in a bad mood...now, I could just go off and be a jerk to everyone, or be nice and dreams about flowers and rainbows. Either way, I'm more than likely going to be in a bad mood.
Plus I think it's totally arrogant to think that because you 'feel' bad that you get to treat people poorly. Get over it! We all have days/weeks/months/years that we feel 'bad.' Gimme a break. Totally pu$$y....IMO.
Fair enough, although I think it could also be argued that choosing to take the high road can sometimes put you in a better mood if you see positive reactions/consequences to your choice.
But still, it's really not YOU who's controlling your mood, just other people affecting your mood because of your actions. Granted you're controlling your mood in an indirect manner, but it's not really in your immediate control.
I could wake up in the best mood possible, feeling like I could take on the whole world, greet everyone with a big smile in the morning, go to work, find out that my day is going to pretty much suck, and end up in a bad mood. Honestly, I think outside factors contribute more to moods that our own actions.
Yes, I'm agreeing with you that outside factors have more of an effect. I'm just saying that the mood could also be changed for the positive based on external factors like the reactions/consequences of other people and things that happen based on our actions.
Not that it matters I suppose.
People who truly have mental problems not withstanding, we can all control our moods, or more precisely, the consequences of them.
Example: If you're not in a "good mood," and you yell at your kids, but not at your boss, you're controlling yourself.
Most "moody people" I know, know just who they can be "moody' with.
And I completely agree with you on moods being changed by outside factors. All I'm saying is that I don't feel that we can directly control our moods all by ourselves, we require some outside influence to change our moods.
For example, if you're sick, and stay home from work, if you're alone all day, you'll just feel miserable...end of story. But, if a couple of your friends stop by, they can put you in a good mood...now, you yourself did nothing to put yourself in a good mood, but your friends did.
Interesting thread. More interesting to myself because this is WHY I just gave my notice(3 days ago) to the rock trio I am in.
I am almost always in a good mood.. or at least a tolerable one heh. Call me the glue in the band if you will.
The guitar player lost his cool on our last gig.. Not at me as much as the drummer(he is new, so I forgive his errors). I told him how I felt about that and he apologized to me and understood my reasons for leaving the band. Interestingly enough, he did point out other things going on in his life that attributed to him losing his cool.
I didn't reply this to him, but that isn't my problem and that it shouldn't be brought into a different arena of your life where it can affect others in a negative way. It was best left unsaid in my opinion. If he learns from my reasoning, good. If he doesn't, oh well. Some people have to fall on their ass all by themselves.
Sorry for hijacking the thread, but it is in direct relation to what I am going through.