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venting i am so angry right now

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by morningdove, Apr 14, 2003.

  1. i arrived at work late yesterday. i took 3 hours off to be able to say good bye to company leaving. it was approved. so anyway, i arrived to work at 11 in the morning. i walk in to a situation.
    i work in a residential group home. anyway, it turns out that a resident while getting a puzzle got into the contraband box (a box we store things the kids can not have), and stole another residents pager. it was found. when i walked in it was reported to me. well, i told the staff to call the coordinator to let them know and do an SIR (serious incident report) and theft charges. this resident is constantly stealing from the other kids adn nothing gets done. well, we were not allowed to do the SIR or charges. i hate lying, i hate a liar. well, i had to lie to the other resident when asked if we found the pager that was stolen. i had to tell her it was never stolen and it is in the box. how i hated saying that. if i told her it was stolen and the higher ups said to do nothing, all hell would have broken out. so that was strike one, i am so against liars, so against lying to a kid, i had to break my own code of ethics to keep peace.
    well, then this same resident who stole, decided to run away. we did up the papers, police, so on. the police found the resident after 2 hours. returned resident. well, again higher ups said no petition for running, just SIR. hmmmmm, now if anyone even steps out the door to get air without permission, they get a charge for running. so okay, i am angry about this now. well, that is not all.
    this same resident comes in with an attitude from hell. now staff, we have been telling higher ups and therapist she is a ticking time bomb. ok. well, during a group session, this kid jumps out of her seat, starts cursing a resident, for no reason i may add, the other resident was talking to another resident quietly, the one who jumped up decided it was about her. it wasn't. staff was there. i was there. anyway, she jumps up, starts cursing this other resident, runs and starts beating the hell out of her. we got her off of her, she hit me twice. well, she goes to residents room and tries to attack this resident again. staff is in the middle. refuses to let her get to her. phone rings, higher up. i called to tell them what is going on, hung up on them when another staff yelled for help. anyway, they call back. i sent other staff to talk to higher up, this resident decides to go attack the other staff. now in all this the resident is screaming, cursing, threatening our lives and the other residents life. well, she runs up, i ran in between them telling other staff to get in the office and shut the door. to protect other staff. well, resident blocked doorway leading to office. well, she got around me, slammed the other staff, i got between, got slammed 2 more times trying to protect this staff. i get the other staff in the office with door shut and locked. she is talking to higher up while all this is happening, even getting hit. resident tries to run to residents room, she has door shut, i got there first, put myself between door and this kid. well, finally got her in the other office and barricaded the door so she could not get out. higher up said to call the police, this is a very volatile situation and 2 of her staff has been hit and a resident has been attacked. we call police. higher up said to press charges, 3 assault. so we did. kid was taken to hospital to see if she needed to be put in mental hospital for a few days. not juvenile or detention. ok, no problem. she is gone, staff and other residents are safe, she is gone. well, i call today to find out when the arraignment is, and the higher up, above the other one, starts yelling. she does NOT want this to go to court. does not want petitions and assault charges done on this kid. this kid has had a hard life, and does not know any better. BULL. this kid has been there for 2 months, has threatened to kill somebody everyday. not an excuse. we get kids from extremely hard lives, hell i lived one, this is not an excuse. she is going to be brought back to the group home.
    now, the kid she attacked is going to see that nothing is going to be, she feels threatened already, and will be extremely angry nothing is going to be done. this kid, if she even looks at someone wrong gets punished for everything.
    now, two staff were hit. other residents are going to see that nothing will happen if you hit staff and threaten to kill them. what is the message, do what you want to staff, nothing will happen. hmmmmmmm.
    now, this also makes it a very unsafe environment for all staff and for our other residents. this kid will now know nothing at all ever will be done, just like the other times, and will go all out and do this again, worse next time maybe.
    i have thought about leaving before, however, now, i think this has done it. i can not work in an environment that will let things like this happen and do nothing. if it was our higher higher up that got hit, you can bet your butts she would be thrown in juvie for a long time. it is, screw the staff and screw the residents. oh i am so angry.:mad:
    sorry so long. i need to make some decisions, i have two children of my own i have to be here for, and can not let anything happen to me. yet, i love my job, i love working with the kids, they are like my own kids. i put so much into them, so much love and care, i love teaching them, guiding them, seeing them leave and make it out there. and yes, i even love the kid who did all that. i am just very angry right now and do not want to make the wrong decisions while in this mode. :mad: :(
  2. john turner

    john turner You don't want to do that. Trust me. Staff Member

    Mar 14, 2000
    atlanta ga
    you need to go around the "higher up". go to the police, press personal charges, since you were struck - shoot, threaten to sue where you work for not keeping a safe environment.
  3. Brendan


    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
  4. T.B. Player

    T.B. Player

    Aug 10, 2002
    Orange, Texas
    My parents have run a residential group home since I was 14. I'm 22 now and they have regularly had up to 12 kids at a time. You think its hard working as a staff member, try living in the same house when one of these kids decides to go off on your parents like what you described. I moved out when I was 18 because I couldn't take seeing my parents get treated like that when all they were trying to do was show these kids love.

    The foster care system in our country is a joke. Yeah these kids come from broken homes, but they don't know how to accept it when someone truly cares for them because they don't know what love is. Foster kids in Texas get free tuition to any Texas college they want.

    My parents have had probably 40 to 50 kids at different times and only one has actually made it through college to become a semi success story. About 30 of them are in lockdown facilities for kids, or prison. The hard fact is that these kids end up like their parents who abused them. They depend on the system to do everything for them.

    Sorry about hijacking your thread, but it is a sore subject for me. My older brother is also a staff worker at a group home. To do this kind of work you have to be very patient and not expect any kind of return of affection from the kids. You cannot wear your heart on your sleeve, these kids will let you down.

    Case workers, therapist, and social workers make hardly any money so don't expect them to want to go out of their way. As you can see I'm not very optimistic about any of this. Its a thankless job for certain kind of people and I've seem a lot of people quit this business.
  5. Jon Burnet

    Jon Burnet

    Jan 21, 2001
    Memphis, TN
    my wife works in one of those places on sterioids. she works with juvinile SEXUAL offenders! they lay a hand on you they are liavble under courts rule. call the cops and press charges... seriously. tell the kids dcs worker and have them sent to a different institution. put it this way.. i now know why other species eat their own young;)
  6. Mike Money

    Mike Money Banned

    Mar 18, 2003
    Bakersfield California
    Avatar Speakers Endorsing Hooligan
    That sucks... Can't you just deck them on accident when they go nuts?