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Well, I have this disability, and I need my job to accomodate me...

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Gard, May 17, 2011.


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  1. IconBasser

    IconBasser Scuba Viking Supporting Member

    Feb 28, 2007
    Fontana, California
    I was wondering when this would show up on here.

    she does have a legitimate disability though. From what I've read, it can actually be quite painful.
     
  2. bongomania

    bongomania Gold Supporting Member Commercial User

    Oct 17, 2005
    PDX, OR
    owner, OVNIFX and OVNILabs
    Kleptomania is a disease, right? Maybe a klepto should sue for the right to steal from their employer.
     
  3. Looking forward to reading this when I'm NOT on a Federal computer...
     
  4. Oh boy, there's a video....>.<
     
  5. it's not as good as you would have hoped for:ninja:
     

  6. :eek:


    That's not what I meant....well, kinda not what I....never mind.
     
  7. MatticusMania

    MatticusMania LANA! HE REMEMBERS ME!

    Sep 10, 2008
    Pomona, SoCal
    How can I obtain said rights from my employer?
     
  8. bongomania

    bongomania Gold Supporting Member Commercial User

    Oct 17, 2005
    PDX, OR
    owner, OVNIFX and OVNILabs
    How about alcoholism, can't people sue for the right to drink on the job?

    In all seriousness, I once worked a temp job where a guy was sent home because he smelled like booze; he told me it was their loss, because he had been drinking for so many years that he had a permanent case of the shakes, and his hands would only stop shaking after he'd had a drink. So with a drink under his belt, he could be a productively employed citizen, but without being allowed to drink, he couldn't even do menial jobs.
     
  9. :ninja:
     
  10. IconBasser

    IconBasser Scuba Viking Supporting Member

    Feb 28, 2007
    Fontana, California

    false analogy. The act of relieving your stress as a Kleptomaniac violates another's property rights. Ms. Bezerra harms nobody and violates nobody's rights by masturbating.
     
  11. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    personally I'd have gone for narcolepsy myself. Yeah I know - different animal but still
     
  12. Exactly!

    I'd totally high five this woman, her lawyer, and the judge. Sucks about whatever condition she may have but this story reeks of pure awesome, lol.
     
  13. [​IMG]

    Wouldn't bother me at all if her desk were next to mine...far be it from me to keep Ms. Bezerra from being able to function.

    :ninja:
     
  14. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    I would hope that you consider washing your hands somewhere along the line?
     
  15. nutdog

    nutdog when I'm a good dog they sometimes throw me a bone Supporting Member

    Feb 19, 2009
    in the dog house
    47 times/day isn't normal?
     
  16. I'm assuming it's less than normal?
     
  17. Pssh, wouldn't bother me, neither. Who am I to rob Ms. Bezerra of her rights? Now the missus, on the other hand....yeah, something tells me to leave that part of it out when asked, "How was work?" :D
     
  18. tastybasslines

    tastybasslines Banned

    May 9, 2010
    Los Angeles, CA
    I'm not so sure that it doesn't violate someone's rights. I'm assuming she has her own closed office to perform these acts or else it might.

    On another note, how productive of an employee could she be? Assuming she sleeps for 8 hours each day, masturbating 47 times a day is every 20 minutes while awake. How long does it take to diddle and wash before returning to work? Has to be more than 5 minutes. Just by her masturbation alone, she is wasting at least 25% of the workday.
     
  19. If you worked next to her, the misses would rob you of more than your rights..:bag:
     

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