I auditioned for and joined a rockabilly band a little while back, I guess starting in October or so. Seemed like a good group, played pretty well, nice guys. The BL is lead guitarist, there's a singer/guitarist and a drummer and me. We threw together a short set to play a benefit for my wife's library, a week before Thanksgiving, and all seemed good. After that, it seemed to be having some trouble moving forward. We didn't have any system to set what the next set of songs were to be for the following practice, and kind of stewed around, ran through the existing stuff and added a few tunes but didn't really get anywhere. So two weeks ago the drummer says, he needs to have homework for us to work on. Nobody did anything, so I went ahead after last week's practice and set up a Dropbox for the band to use (all having agreed that it would be a good way to go). I don't have files of a lot of relevant tunes but I have some ideas I've been batting around, more current and offbeat stuff that fits the genre, but I don't have a lot of the classic oldies rockabilly. I set up separate dropbox folders for "ideas" and "homework" and drop my songs in the "ideas" folder. Everyone gets links to give them access. Days pass. Nothing else gets added to the folder. Then Sunday afternoon, a freaked-out email from the BL: "this is all wrong! It looks like a mess. It is a mess! Where are all the classic rockabilly hits?" I bite my tongue and draft as businesslike an email as I can muster, saying that everyone has access to the dropbox and can add whatever songs they want to do, but that I can't add the songs he wants for him, I'm waiting for him to add them and I'll be happy to learn them. Still nobody adds anything to the folder. Instead there's an email from the BL saying we'll have to talk Wednesday (when we practice) and discuss the direction the band is going in. OK... So tonight comes and I get to practice, the rest of them are there. The BL starts to talk. Basically, his idea was to have a classic 50s band, he doesn't know all these other tunes and they confuse him (backstory; the second week I was with the band, I asked them if the idea was to have a nostalgia/oldies band or if they would be open to a more contemporary/retro approach. We established the initial idea was oldies but they were open to adding more contemporary stuff as we went along. Hence my planting some in the "ideas" folder). OK, fine, this is all well and good, I'm waiting for him to wrap up and let the rest of us to say our piece and give our perspectives. Then all of a sudden he transitions into laying into the drummer, says we need to be practicing at home because the drummer needs to be practicing at home because he's playing the wrong tempos and he's dragging the band down and really he's the weak link in the band and... and.. and... I'm totally taken aback by this twist. He throws in those "fake apologies," saying "I'm sorry I'm being honest here, and if I'm the only one who will...", implying that the singer and I are also unhappy with the drumming (we're not, and say so) but he's the only one with the guts to say it... and on and on... The drummer tries to defend himself and tries to get back on track but the BL is pretty much off the rails now and has run this in a direction where there's no constructive way to work our way out of the hole he's dug. The two start yelling and then the BL is storming off to another room like he's going to calm down but then he's back in and picking up on the same track... The singer is a smart and mild-mannered guy who tries to intervene and mediate and get them listening to each other but it's too far gone for that, he and I can't really do anything but sit by and watch them have a meltdown. Next thing I know the drummer is packing up his sticks and leaving, BL is storming off to the other room again. I look at the singer and say, "Well, I've got family at home. Let's let this cool off and reconvene after New Year's and see where we stand then." He nods, I unplug and leave, and that's that. It's too bad, there really weren't any red flags of this at the audition or in the first weeks, everybody seemed pretty flexible and chill. I guess the honeymoon is over and we're seeing the BL's actual temperament come out. I don't know what their pattern is, if they blow up and patch it over (they have history) and it just goes on. But I'm not so desperate to be in this particular band or playing this particular music. I'm going to give it some time to think about it, but I think I would need a lot of persuading to want to continue with this group.