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What am I doing wrong?

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous [BG]' started by zeppfan90, Mar 29, 2014.

  1. zeppfan90


    Mar 27, 2013
    I want to get out and play! I meet a guitarist and we jam maybe 2 or 3 times and then I can't get them to jam again. I'll text and they just stop responding. I know it's nothing with my skills because I know I'm a very good bassist and even the guys I jam with say so. I have literally driven an hour more than once to meet up and jam and would be happy to keep doing so because I want to rehearse and I want to play. And I am ALWAYS the one that does the traveling every time. I tell these guys "I will come up on all my days off." and I volunteer to when the time comes but I cannot get any responses. Sure, I have those days where I just want to chill and not do anything but I push past that feeling.

    This is why I like playing with older musicians. Lol Rant over. Frustration dealt with. Haha
  2. Milk


    Sep 16, 2013
    Montreal, Canada
    How are you socially?

    Maybe they think you're weird.:hyper:

    Or maybe they're just flakes.

    O rmaybe THEY feel it didn't gel.
  3. nukes_da_bass

    nukes_da_bass Banned

    Feb 19, 2006
    west suburban boston
    Scroo gui****s- chase drummers!!!!
    Get with a drum buddy and create a rhythm section. Write some funky grooves.
    The gui****s will.be drooling to jam with you guys.
  4. Boom762

    Boom762 I AM the one who Booms! Supporting Member

    Oct 19, 2013
    Lubbock, TX
    In all honesty...

    On a scale from 1 - 10,

    What is your charisma?
    What is your talent for bass?

    If they find you a little "off" or dont like how/what you play, that may be it.

    A lot of younger people dont know what they are doing schedule wise too. Theyll play guitar for 30 minutes, make plans to go to a movie and before they ever reach the theater be headed to someones house.
  5. Kmonk


    Oct 18, 2012
    South Shore, Massachusetts
    Endorsing Artist: Fender, Spector, Ampeg, Curt Mangan Strings, Nordstrand Pickups, Korg Keyboards
    Most people are not very objective when it comes to their own playing. Some people are better than they think they are but most are not even close to being as good as they think they are. It could be that you are not quite as good as you believe or not as good as the people you have jammed with. Maybe they didn't think your style fit what they wanted to do or felt that your personality wasn't a good match.
  6. zeppfan90


    Mar 27, 2013
    Socially, I'm generally a pretty quiet person. I don't have a big head at all and am one of the more laid back nicer people one could meet. I can hold my own on bass. I never give puzzled looks when people try to tell me progressions/key changes. I can play different styles. I can play with a pick, fingerstyle, and slap. At open jams, I'm complimented often and give thanks when I am. The one negative thing I have been criticized on is I can play too fast or fancy sometimes and I get hard to keep up with and they get lost. Then again somebody else might say the opposite lol. But I also know how to keep it simple which is usually what I do. The "fancy" stuff I just do in small doses.

    The thing about styles not fitting in my situations don't really apply. Because a few of these guys have wanted to do just covers. I always learn the songs and I can learn pretty quickly. When it comes to originals, how can one expect to get anything going if they don't put in the effort to jam more than 1-3 times? It's sort of unrealistic to expect to get a full repertoire of originals put together if you only jam 3 times. I'm not saying I'm Mr. Dedicated over here, all I'm saying is I put in the necessary work to get things going all just for it to not even matter in the end. It's very discouraging. Lol
  7. mellowinman

    mellowinman Free Man

    Oct 19, 2011
    Audition for bands. Respond to "bass player wanted" ads. Test out your appeal among people who actually want to play. You may have only jammed with worthless people who happen to play a little guitar.

    There's a couple of those out there, you know.
  8. Stick_Player

    Stick_Player Banned

    Nov 13, 2009
    Somewhere on the Alaska Panhandle (Juneau)
    Endorser: Plants vs. Zombies Pea Shooters
    Not getting any calls from these? Are you making yourself "available"? Self-promotion?

    Seems like you can gain more from playing with others, than wrangling up a couple of flakey wankers.
  9. Zephrant


    Dec 10, 2013
    Spokane, WA
    How is your BO? Guy a few cubes down from me douses himself in something smelly each day and it is driving me nuts. Nicest, quietest guy, but I can't stand to be around his smell. It would crush him if I said anything, but wow.....

    Post a video for us to check. You'll get honest feedback.
  10. fhm555

    fhm555 So FOS my eyes are brown Supporting Member

    Feb 16, 2011

    Get tight with a crackerjack drummer and the rest of the band will follow.

    One thing a lot of guitar players want when jamming is to solo a lot and if you are playing a dense line they can't find any room to solo in, they won't be there for long.