What happend to the UGLY bass competition?

am i holding this up...geeze, yeah, i guess i am. sorry guys. i'm on it tomorrow.

man, do you have any idea how much wedding invitations cost? barbie and i've been looking the past few days.

anyway, enough complaining/excuses.

the plan is that i'll have don's page and chris's page up tomorrow some time (at least, that's the plan ) and then you guys can look at your own pages first, see that everything is in order, and then i'll send links to all hail and TOFU NUTS and i, and we'll vote. then we'll proceed from there.

 

well, it depends, are you going to attach the strap to the neck or the body? if you attach the strap to the back of the neck, preferably around the octave, then present style rules dictate that the strap contrast with the sepia tones of the player's skin in such a way as to reinforce the flowing lines of player and instrument into a seemless simulacrum of a mating ostrich with learning disabilities.

if connected to the body, then black or brown will do nicely.

 

there again, one can not forget the contributions made to the art and science of strap-making from the small tribe of tibetan yak herders known as the Pan-To. for centuries their fine weavings of virgin yak nostril hair have adorned the straps and undergarments of kings, shahs and various upper government officials of stature, taste, and means.

their finest offerings incorporate weavings of the future owner's own nostril hairs, obviating the need for any mounting and conecting devices.

the chartreuse and sepia hues of such a well-made support contrivance cry out fashion and taste, and, although are often imitated by various korean and chinese factories, can't be duplicated by modern manufacturing techniques.

truly the mark of good breeding, elegance and class, a custom Pan-To Nose-strap is a sought after item by many of the finer musicians "in-the-know". i have 7 myself, including the pride of my collection, a triple-flamed melted-hair strap, featuring the natural colorings and contrasts of the yak, the wild tibetan slug-boar and the fierce southern asiatic water weasel. the chartreuse of the yak hair contrasts wonderfully with the dark indigo of the slug-boar's nostril fibers and the bright cadmium tones of those rare and fiesty water weasels.

i deal directly with Khan Lin, in tibet, a true artisan and skilled nostril hair weaver without peer. any interested parties can feel free to contact me via email and i can hook you up.

they've done wonders for my allergies, too.

 

i call all my straps "sir" or "ma'am" depending upon each's peculiar predilection. after all, proper respect shown towards one's strap helps maintain a secure relationship.