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what if Microsoft made gear ?

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by bassed dude, Feb 16, 2003.

  1. Damn computers:mad:
    Do you all have problems with microsoft software?
    i guess if ms made bass gear the net few things would happen:

    1) You must connect you bass before switching amp power on, if you don't the amp will ask you to pluck F# if you want it to turn on.
    2) All of your gear will have to be ms, if not it won't work.
    3) if you changed your strings, you will have to change the instrument cables aswell. don't ask why.
    4) The amp will automaticly shut down if you used "distortion, chorus and wahwah" at the same time.
    5) You won't be able to play simultaniusly through your 1x15" and your 4x10" tho you will have the in- and outputs.
    6) The waranty will be void if you changed any settings on the pre amp, including equaliser and volume.
    7) You'll need a patch to make your "gain" work
    8) if you want to play louder PLUCK HARDER the amp has enough power, they say so.
    9) you must upgrade your amp each year or it won't be able to play the new riffs you wrote.
    10) everyone in your band must have ms gear or it would be impossible to play in tone and time with each other.
    11) for no reason your gear will fail now and than. that's normal and there is nothing you can do about it.
  2. Brendan

    Brendan Supporting Member

    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    Hey...that's actually pretty good. I give you the official Bass Humor and Gig Stories Thumbs Up of Approval (BH&GSTUA)
  3. Wrong Robot

    Wrong Robot Guest

    Apr 8, 2002
    thats the ugliest 'word' I've ever seen ;)

    I'm a mac-user! hahahaha ;) :D
  4. Brooks


    Apr 4, 2000
    Middle East
    That reminds me...how many Microsoft employees would it take to change a bulb?

    None... Bill will just innovate Darkness© into a new industry strandard.
  5. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
    Actually, I've had little to no problem with M.S. software. I had some issues with 98, but once I learned how to use it, no problem. 2000 and XP have been problem free. :) I dislike MS and Apple. I love the kickass community of smart people who work on things like linux and bsd.
  6. FretNoMore

    FretNoMore * Cooking with GAS *

    Jan 25, 2002
    The frozen north
    Originally posted by bassed dude:
    4) The amp will automaticly shut down if you used "distortion, chorus and wahwah" at the same time.

    Actually, some would welcome that function... :p
  7. rickbass

    rickbass Supporting Member

    Pastorius would have been a network engineer.
  8. Wrong Robot

    Wrong Robot Guest

    Apr 8, 2002
    Of course OS X is 100% Unix based, and mac-heads are generally really geeky. ;)
  9. Phat Ham

    Phat Ham

    Feb 13, 2000
    Same here. :D have been since my dad bought the first family computer (Mac SE) in the eighties.
  10. Amethska


    Jan 27, 2003
    NJ, USA
    Haha, I like that

    I get problems with Windows Me...
    Like it always freezing up when it goes into stand by... and the alt-ctrl-del thing becomes absolutely useless. Such a pain.
  11. Phat Ham

    Phat Ham

    Feb 13, 2000
    You need to get the new Microsoft keyboard:

  12. Brendan

    Brendan Supporting Member

    Jun 18, 2000
    Austin, TX
    Well, ME is the dookiest (it's a word...) MS product you can find. 98, 95, 2k and even XP are infinitely more stable than ME. And given the chrash rate of ME, that means that the other OS's work, at least some of the time.
  13. lesfleanut

    lesfleanut Guest

    Sep 25, 2001
    Syracuse N.Y.
    I don't find XP to be unstable at all. I usually leave my PC running for extended periods of time (at the most 5 or 6 days) and it very rarely crashes on me. Even then it is just because I installed a bad program or just messed up something. I think the stability has a lot to do with what kind of hardware you have, and how well you can operate and maintain a computer. Microsoft gets a bad name, but they have been putting out good operating systems and products. Don’t we have any good Apple jokes?:D
  14. Wrong Robot

    Wrong Robot Guest

    Apr 8, 2002
    Here's a funny windows(dos) error.

    A Friend of mine decided he needed a windows box to network with the schools file sharing system(his problem was later solved by updating OS X) He gets a cheap old system from the network admin at school, and as he is trying to get it to work, for some reason he didn't have a keyboard plugged in at the moment, the computer loaded into dos and said no keyboard detected, press any key to continue :D
    isn't that great?
  15. Josh Ryan

    Josh Ryan - that dog won't hunt, Monsignor. Supporting Member

    Mar 24, 2001
    It's cool that they finally made a real OS. ;) -they have done interesting things with Darwin. I'll still take the free versions, but I wish I had a G4 to experiment with. I can't really screw around heavily with the Macs I have access too, as they are work boxes.
  16. Phat Ham

    Phat Ham

    Feb 13, 2000
    One of my EE professors has a bunch of computers running HPUX, linux, windows, mac OS9 and an ibook running OS X. He said out of all of them OS X was definitely his favorite, and he hasn't rebooted his ibook in weeks. Just goes to show how stable OS X is. I've only gone a few days without rebooting, but that's just because I'm doing everything I can to keep the power bill down so I shut it down at night.

    One of my friends is still running Windows 98 on his POS Gateway, and every day he tells me he feels like tearing the thing apart and throwing out his window. Windows ME is just as bad (if not worse). Even though I'm a mac guy I have to say 2000 and XP aren't that bad. I mean, you don't even have to reboot every five minutes.:)

    And no, there aren't any good Apple jokes because they work (although system 7 wasn't exactly stellar). All Microsoft does is rip off Apple (and poorly at that). Bill Gates makes a killing off of other people's ideas.
  17. Wrong Robot

    Wrong Robot Guest

    Apr 8, 2002
    Interesting factoid. When you boot a computer you use up about the same amount of energy as having that comptuer run for 12 hours(12 non-CPU intensive hours)

    because when you boot up ALL the components get checked and powered up and things tend to take up the most power on initial booting anyway, whereas when you are running components are only used as they are needed.

    apple's sleep function takes up less power than a digital watch.
  18. Phat Ham

    Phat Ham

    Feb 13, 2000
    Well after reading that I guess my powerbook just isn't going to get rebooted ever again.:)
  19. Nice one! I remember seeing the comparison by the CEO of General Motors (I think), responding to a comment made by Bill Gates.....If I find it I'll post it!

    I've had no problems with XP - I find it pretty good actually, but I just a desk jockey who plays a lot of games..... The only issue I had with my PC was it kept crashing when I was playing Microsoft Combat Flight Simulator 2. Turns out it was an issue with the Graphics card driver. Download new driver - all problems went away!

    In fact I do still have a niggle with Mocrosoft. I bought a Force Feedback Joystick - which isn't compatible (it turns out) with XP........ I really must contact them to see if there's anything I can do to get it to work!
  20. BlackNeckJspl


    Dec 14, 2002
    I see you have experienced the "Joys" of older computers. BTW a brand new computer sold at the same tine as my Bass was brand new would have been a 286! Which one was the better long term investment?

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