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What if .....

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Funky Ghost, Aug 10, 2012.

  1. Funky Ghost

    Funky Ghost Translucently Groovy

    What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% the speed of light?

    Let’s set aside the question of how we got the baseball moving that fast. We'll suppose it's a normal pitch, except in the instant the pitcher releases the ball, it magically accelerates to 0.9c. From that point onward, everything proceeds according to normal physics.:


    The answer turns out to be “a lot of things”, and they all happen very quickly, and it doesn’t end well for the batter (or the pitcher). I sat down with some physics books, a Nolan Ryan action figure, and a bunch of videotapes of nuclear tests and tried to sort it all out. What follows is my best guess at a nanosecond-by-nanosecond portrait:

    The ball is going so fast that everything else is practically stationary. Even the molecules in the air are stationary. Air molecules vibrate back and forth at a few hundred miles per hour, but the ball is moving through them at 600 million miles per hour. This means that as far as the ball is concerned, they’re just hanging there, frozen.

    The ideas of aerodynamics don’t apply here. Normally, air would flow around anything moving through it. But the air molecules in front of this ball don’t have time to be jostled out of the way. The ball smacks into them so hard that the atoms in the air molecules actually fuse with the atoms in the ball’s surface. Each collision releases a burst of gamma rays and scattered particles.



    These gamma rays and debris expand outward in a bubble centered on the pitcher’s mound. They start to tear apart the molecules in the air, ripping the electrons from the nuclei and turning the air in the stadium into an expanding bubble of incandescent plasma. The wall of this bubble approaches the batter at about the speed of light—only slightly ahead of the ball itself.


    The constant fusion at the front of the ball pushes back on it, slowing it down, as if the ball were a rocket flying tail-first while firing its engines. Unfortunately, the ball is going so fast that even the tremendous force from this ongoing thermonuclear explosion barely slows it down at all. It does, however, start to eat away at the surface, blasting tiny particulate fragments of the ball in all directions. These fragments are going so fast that when they hit air molecules, they trigger two or three more rounds of fusion.

    After about 70 nanoseconds the ball arrives at home plate. The batter hasn't even seen the pitcher let go of the ball, since the light carrying that information arrives at about the same time the ball does. Collisions with the air have eaten the ball away almost completely, and it is now a bullet-shaped cloud of expanding plasma (mainly carbon, oxygen, hydrogen, and nitrogen) ramming into the air and triggering more fusion as it goes. The shell of x-rays hits the batter first, and a handful of nanoseconds later the debris cloud hits.
    When it reaches the batter, the center of the cloud is still moving at an appreciable fraction of the speed of light. It hits the bat first, but then the batter, plate, and catcher are all scooped up and carried backward through the backstop as they disintegrate. The shell of x-rays and superheated plasma expands outward and upward, swallowing the backstop, both teams, the stands, and the surrounding neighborhood—all in the first microsecond.
    Suppose you’re watching from a hilltop outside the city. The first thing you see is a blinding light, far outshining the sun. This gradually fades over the course of a few seconds, and a growing fireball rises into a mushroom cloud. Then, with a great roar, the blast wave arrives, tearing up trees and shredding houses.
    Everything within roughly a mile of the park is leveled, and a firestorm engulfs the surrounding city. The baseball diamond is now a sizable crater, centered a few hundred feet behind the former location of the backstop.


    A careful reading of official Major League Baseball Rule 6.08(b) suggests that in this situation, the batter would be considered "hit by pitch", and would be eligible to advance to first base.
  2. Definitely

    Definitely Banned

    I'm guessing the bat would break too
  3. chris1125


    May 14, 2007
    Sounds like you need to do less thinking and more playing. :bassist:
  4. Funky Ghost

    Funky Ghost Translucently Groovy


    There may be truth to that, although I can't claim this as my own, just something I found interesting and clever as hell :)
  5. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    Where did you cut and paste that from? :D

  6. What if you just posted a link to what you found, instead of taking the time to copy and paste the page contents...
  7. the last line is the best part
  8. Hahaha!!! I concur. This is exactly what would happen.

    Yep, yep, yep, uh huh, uh huh!

  9. Yogi Bear

    Yogi Bear

    Aug 14, 2000
    I believe that this is the exact scenario required, by law, that would allow Pete Rose to be associated with MLB.
  10. Funky Ghost

    Funky Ghost Translucently Groovy

    Because I found myself with the time to do so, I was not inclined to take a lazy approach to a thread and finally it's easier on the reader to not navigate away from TB.

    That ok with you?
  11. bluesblaster


    Jan 2, 2008
    sounds like extreme sports........no, maybe nerdy sports, I dont know.
  12. slobake

    slobake resident ... something Supporting Member

    Another reason to keep sterioids and other PED's out of baseball.
  13. BelleNoireBass


    Apr 18, 2012
    Bay Area
    This should have been in the OP imo. I thought you actually did all the research and little drawings and everything. Now that I know you didn't and didn't let anyone know... :mad::spit:
  14. XKCD is awesome.

    I;d really love to see a simulation of that. The Discovery Channel could make that a thing, right? Hell, the Discovery Channel should make a show out of XKCD strips...
  15. slobake

    slobake resident ... something Supporting Member

    Mythbusters ?
  16. OK, so let me get this right, we dropped a BASEBALL on Hiroshima???
  17. I like Mythbusters but it's too tame for me. Not that what they do isn't completely awesome but the real world has so many limitations, lol.
  18. Yogi Bear

    Yogi Bear

    Aug 14, 2000
    They left that little tidbit out of the history books, didn't they?
  19. MatticusMania

    MatticusMania LANA! HE REMEMBERS ME!

    Sep 10, 2008
    Pomona, SoCal
    Give me two hits of LSD, a secluded stream in the forest, and 24 hours.

    I will return with the answers you seek!
  20. colcifer

    colcifer Esteemed Nitpicker Supporting Member

    Feb 10, 2010
    A Galaxy Far, Far Away
    You should've done both. Gotta give credit to the author.

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