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What was the dumbest thing an audience member ever said to you?

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by Benthoven, Jul 17, 2019.

  1. Take it as a compliment; she was lost in the music!
    Mr_Moo, MattZilla and Richland123 like this.
  2. Benthoven


    May 26, 2009
    Charlotte, NC
    Sorry, I don't even know what "Momo" is! Lol~
  3. Benthoven


    May 26, 2009
    Charlotte, NC
    Yeah, each bass is just a standard J-bass (with Bartolini's) , and there's a bass selector switch between them. I originally built it as a short scale, (which I never fell in love with) and just recently made the two 34" scale necks - and WOW! It sounds amazing now.
    Miles_ONeal and pablomago like this.
  4. Benthoven


    May 26, 2009
    Charlotte, NC
    OK I will finally weigh in on this "Ya'll" spelling controversy here. I was born and raised in South Carolina. We often pronounce 'you' as 'ya'. I. E. What's it to ya? Where ya going? Haven't heard from ya lately. We don't care how ya do things up north. So, when I contract "ya all" to "ya'll" I don't see what the problem is.
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2019
  5. Richland123


    Apr 17, 2009
    I think she was also lost in her several beers. :laugh:
    Mike Whitfield likes this.
  6. Paulabass


    Sep 18, 2017
    Just this weekend.
    Walked into the club with my bass, an Anvil briefcase, and a speaker cab. Put it on the floor under a sign that said- Live Music Tonite!
    Guy jumps off his barstool, approaches, and asks 'Are you playing here?'
  7. Richland123


    Apr 17, 2009
    I like when I hear this one while we are setting up.

    Are you guys a D.J.?
  8. No - I'm just putting my speaker cab here so you have somewhere to put your beer
  9. Yeah, like a Rush lyric a christian could understand like " We can walk our road together, if our goals are all the same. We can run alone and free, if we pursue a different aim. Let the truth of Love be lighted, let the love of Truth shine clear. Sensibility, armed with sense and Liberty . With the Heart and Mind United in a single, Perfect Sphere!"
    Spectrum, MattZilla and Miles_ONeal like this.
  10. GroovyBassist


    Mar 17, 2016
    Austin, TX
    I remember seeing Rush in 1982 (Signals Tour) and a similar group was protesting and holding up signs that said Rush stands for "Rulers Under Satin's Hell" LOL!!! I'm a Christian but I don't believe any of that junk. Besides, Rush is far from devil music. Some people need to get a clue.
    The Owl and Winslow like this.
  11. Winslow


    Sep 25, 2011
    Some folks just seem to take the "Man & Star" logo a bit too seriously...


    Not many of them are hanging out here, though. :D
  12. ^ that Rush logo made me Laugh. Which is truly a rare thing indeed.
    RodRy, Miles_ONeal and Winslow like this.
  13. Winslow


    Sep 25, 2011
    Happy to be of service, thanks! :D

    That was one of my better uses for the "straight outta somewhere" meme-maker (back when that site still worked). :thumbsup:
    RodRy and Jimmy4string like this.
  14. I had a girl come up to me after a gig and say, so that is a big guitar...show me how to make a chord, I said, this is a bass we don't really play chords on them..just notes. What kind of notes she says...I'm like oh crap...here we go...she wraps her hand around the neck and starts strumming the strings and says is this a note..I said no..you have to go like this, I finger a B up on the E string..that is a B. She says well do I have to push down on that string like that..?...i said if you want a B yes...she says but I can't do that....now I'm annoyed..(which is why I don't teach)...I put the bass away and said music class is over..you should probably try guitar...
  15. Arnold Zucker at the Victrola makes me laugh!
    Jimmy4string likes this.
  16. dbsfgyd1


    Jun 11, 2012
    Richmond , Va
    “Play Free Bird”
  17. dadglasser


    Oct 11, 2009
    I used to know a guy who, when he would fart really loud, would say, "only an a$$hole would say something like that."
    equill and DrMole like this.
  18. PaulReside


    Mar 14, 2016
    Scottsdale Az
    If I may say sir you missed an opportunity. :rollno::smug:
  19. jthisdell

    jthisdell Supporting Member

    Jun 12, 2014
    Roanoke, VA
    Finished a set a few month ago, last song was Cumberland Blues. This couple stops us as we walk away and says that was great, could we play some Dead next set? We said sure.

    Back in college my band finished a raging set ending with Dirty Deeds and this cute girl comes up to me and said Pretty good but you should drop the AC D.C. I tried to explain that it was sort of an inside joke and we did not really do heavy rock but she stumbled off into the crowd. Caught up to her around campus and 38 years later she is still here.
    Mr_Moo, Spectrum, equill and 4 others like this.
  20. While playing a NYE gig about 10 years ago a lady and her partner were dancing in front of my mic.... I just happened to glance at the lady who appeared to have a large chest area... the woman waved her finger at me as if to say "you shouldn't be looking at my boobs".... so I just smiled and kept on playing - then the lifted up her blouse and showed them to me! I was shocked
    Singer said to me during the next break "did that woman show you her breasts"?
    "Yep" I smiled

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