We have all seen it. Really intelligent, attractive, good people choosing mates who use them for everything they can with a sneer. Sometimes we try and talk sense to these people but they just can't see it. They keep going back for more abuse. Beautiful smart women who date some guy who hasn't had a job in 20 years and sucks them dry. Good honest dudes who go crawling back to their black widow only to be eaten alive. This is not about gender bashing we all know there are rotten men and rotten women or at least we should. So why do seemingly smart people turn into idiots when it comes to the opposite sex? I read a few things on the internet but I have my own theory and I would like to hear what you think. I think some of us are so desperate for affection that we will ignore everything else just for a little pat on the head. We want someone to genuinely care about us but that can be a rare thing. So often we just use other people to get what we think we need. We may not even be aware that we do that but we are humans and that is how we operate. Some of us turn into cynical burned out cynics who don't trust anyone. Bitter negative people who push everyone away from them out of fear. I think the solution is to find a place where you can be complete by yourself. A place where we are confident in who we are and we don't base our self image on what other people say about us. When we get there then we are ready to give and receive love without expectations. A lot easier said than done, in fact none of us probably do that perfectly but the closer we come to it the better off we will be. What do you think? Yup, another "Dear Diary" post.