This is mainly to pick the brains of the ladies here, but anyone can reply. Psych majors especially. In the past few months, we've read the posts of more than a few members here having very serious problems with their spouses. If I remember correctly, the one statement that seemed to accompany almost all these posts was, "and she didn't talk to me at all," or "this came from out of the blue," or something very similar. Now, everyone please understand I'm not trying to start a heated thread here. What I'm trying to find out is: Why do so many women do this? - Not talk about what's bothering them until it's (almost) too late. I just watched a show last night about biology of the sexes, and one of the innate strengths researchers seem to attribute to women strongly over men is language and communication skills. Do these disappear at the altar? Aside from the members here I have two close friends that are going through extremely messy divorces, one of them you would not believe if I told you how insane it got. I know men and women are NOT on the same frequency a good deal of the time, but how about just leaving your man a note in his shoe that reads, "We need to talk", instead of first getting a moving van or a plane ticket? No flames towards men or women please, just intelligent theories or comments. Maybe we can uncover something that will save someone else's marriage before it goes over the falls. Mike No references to anyone here please.