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Woohoo! Another Relationship Thread!

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by DerHoggz, Mar 4, 2013.


  1. DerHoggz

    DerHoggz I like cats :| Banned

    Feb 13, 2009
    Western Pennsylvania
    Yep, since we are already giving the other a go, might as well pop this one in here as well.

    Anyways, got turned down by a girl. I know, move on, but I'm having a bit of trouble with this one. I feel there were some extenuating circumstances that have since been cleared up and my timing was definitely bad. So what I'm getting at is I think I may still have a chance. Of course I'm not going to do the lap-dog, follow them around deal.

    Have you ever had a girl change her mind?
     
  2. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    Sure. To my wife, being a musician was NOT a plus. In fact, it made me have to work twice as hard because she believed the stereotype about musicians being man whores and drug abusers and whatnot. But I worked on her gently until she gave in. Don't be a lap dog, but at some point you have to "fess up" about what you think/feel. You don't have to be too coy about it either. Honesty gets you much further than cool points. Cool points are for getting in a girl's pants once or twice. But when you find a girl you really like, throw cool out the window and be yourself.
     
  3. Ziltoid

    Ziltoid I don't play bass

    Apr 10, 2009
    Canada
    You're 19. Don't get attached, move-on. Have another go at her if you wish after you abide by maki's rules for some time.
     
  4. Nope. They only get one shot at the title. Not my problem if they miss out.

    She blew it. Find a girl who likes you.
     
  5. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    Just a reminder, before the jaded ones get to you, that my "second chance" became my WIFE. She's the one. Just sayin'.
     
  6. jmattbassplaya

    jmattbassplaya Looking for a gig around East Islip, NY!

    Jan 13, 2008
    Long Island, NY.
    IME and IMHO, no, girls do not give you second chances... unless you move on, give another girl lots of attention, and give her none. Then she might come back.
     
  7. Tat2dHeart

    Tat2dHeart Only two strings away from an attitude problem.

    Going out there a second time after being rejected is like giving the guy with the gun another bullet to use on you. If the circumstances were that extenuating and she's into you, let her come to you. Until then....quantity, child, quantity. And use the wrapper.
     
  8. UncleFluffy

    UncleFluffy

    Mar 8, 2009
    California
    Head Tinkerer, The Flufflab
    Yeah, a couple of years (and many adventures for both of us) later on. Don't wait around. Get on with life.
     
  9. DerHoggz

    DerHoggz I like cats :| Banned

    Feb 13, 2009
    Western Pennsylvania
    Weird thing is, I thought I was fine with it, and then we ended up hanging out again (in a group setting), and my brain was like, "Yeah no." I guess what worries me is that she will be graduating, and then what? Don't want her to be the "Great White Buffalo" I suppose. Not sure how I'm going to play this to be honest, I've been vacillating between just waiting/moving elsewhere or being more active in it.
     
  10. What extenuating circumstances?

    FWIW, move on. She did.

    I spent much of my youth chasing after women and failing miserably. Now that I'm married and have a kid, I sometimes miss the freedom I used to have. I mean, I didn't used to have to ask permission to ride my bike and I didn't used to have to sneak basses in.
     
  11. 4dog

    4dog

    Aug 18, 2012
    Shes just not that into you, read the signs, or shes playing hard to get, call her often, and follow her everywhere, shell come around.
     
  12. DerHoggz

    DerHoggz I like cats :| Banned

    Feb 13, 2009
    Western Pennsylvania
    Well, she thought my friend and I were fighting over her, which was NOT happening in the slightest. Some other stuff as well that I would rather not post. Prior to all this I would definitely say she was at least a little interested.

    The bike thing would be a total dealbreaker, I'll just have to go pro, that way it's my job. :rollno:
     
  13. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    She might change her mind and call the cops......
     
  14. I would be so much faster and wouldn't have anyone telling me how worthless I am around the house. :bag:
     
  15. DerHoggz

    DerHoggz I like cats :| Banned

    Feb 13, 2009
    Western Pennsylvania
    I already get that from my mom when I'm home. "Why can't you do such and such?" as I lay on the couch for a solid few hours post-ride.
     
  16. As long as you get your own place, nobody yells at you.

    It seems strange, but honestly you're in a good spot right now. Sure, many women will NOT give a lot of guys a chance. About any women who seems cool right now will almost certainly throw fits and develop a princess complex when they get married.
     
  17. Avalon

    Avalon

    Feb 28, 2009
    She can totally not be into you, but still like the feeling of being pursued. Its a boost for her self esteem. The whole "fighting over her" thing makes it sound like she just wants the drama. I agree with the brethren: just move on brother - just move on.
     
  18. BioDriver

    BioDriver A Cinderella story

    Aug 29, 2008
    Austin, TX
    You're still young, brush it off and move on to the next one. Don't puppy dog her around, that'll get you either friend zoned or labeled as a creeper (or both). And remember...

    disregard-females-acquire-currency2.
     
  19. ErebusBass

    ErebusBass

    Feb 20, 2008
    Madison, WI
    This is actually the best way to approach any woman. Don't approach her, approach her friends. She will come.
     
  20. Lukc

    Lukc

    Nov 10, 2012
    Portugal
    Well, if you really feel she is worth it go for her. I've been in your situation. One time where I said "SCREW IT, there are better ones out there!" and another situation where "No she is worth it." and it worked. Just make sure she is ACTUALLY worth it
     

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