Hello! A few months back, i joined a then two-member alt/fusion rock band. The drummer and the guitarist have worked together for a decade, and not done much from what I see and hear. One or two gigs, no albums. Apparently no real ambition. Shame, because the guitarist is phenomenal on the instrument and has amazing composing ideas! The drummer knows his stuff too, but is unbelievably "free" with the kick. At first I thought he must be playing some complex odd rhythms or polyrhythms that I can't grasp (I guess i'm an intermediate player/musician ATM) so when I asked him what the pattern he was playing was, he replied: "No pattern, it's jazz!". I tried explaining quite a few times how it's difficult for me not to have the groove from the kick and that it makes me pick the groove from the guitar instead, to which both the guitarist and the drummer said: "Well, what's the problem with that? What does the kick have to do with you, just listen to the hihat". What I hear, in recordings too (admittedly, recorded on phone because we've been trying to get into the studio for months to record but something keeps preventing us to go - no ambition probably), is sonic chaos - the low end is all over, from my groove and the kick's randomness, but neither the guitarist nor the drummer hear it. Last time we spoke about it we actually went into a fight. This frustrates me to such an extent that I'm considering leaving. I'd hate to leave because I want to work with the guitarist and I love our music. I've started not to care about the drummer really - the guitarist does want to record and play but needs a bit of a nudge, which i try to do, yet the drummer keeps being indifferent and my impression is that he even pulls the guitarist back to status quo (i hope I'm wrong). The two of them are friends so the only option I see is either me leaving or staying and shutting up about it, pretending the kick is unimportant. So this kick vs. bass things problem - is it even a problem or is it in my head only? I am honestly doubting myself now. A reminder - we play rock - alternative, sometimes bluesy. We absolutely do not play jazz or anything even outside the 4/4 or 8/8 rhythms.