Fun customer service stories

[kserg]

Ok reading the laptop thread I thought I’d paste this there but instead I will do it here so not to sidetrack that thread.

Share your fun stories with customer service! Mine is about Dell, let’s just note that I am not mad at them (even though I’ll never buy anything from them again) instead I was actually humored by the whole thing. It was way too stupid to be mad at. It gets better at the end; I really could not stop giggling like a 12 year old girl through out the last 20 minutes or so of the conversation.


--
Ok so my monitor broke down and I called dell to replace it yesterday, Total time 1 hour and 40 minutes here is how the thing with dell went:

*After being transferred about 4 times and giving the last guy all my info (name, address, invoice number, phone number, etc)

Him: Can I help you?
Me: Hi, a monitor that I bought from dell a bit less then a year ago broke down and I would like to warranty it.
Him: Ok give me the number on top of your desktop...
Me: What do you mean? You mean from back of my monitor?
Him: NO! Top of your computer right above CDROM there will be a number.
Me: I don’t have a dell PC I only bought a monitor.
Him: That’s good, now what I need you to do is to look at your desktop and find a number.
Me: I don't have a desktop from dell, I only bought a monitor.
Him: *speaking in some language I don’t understand*
Me: What?
Him: you must have a desktop or we can’t fix your pc.
Me: I don't need to fix my pc I need to warranty my monitor, I only bought a monitor from you guys.
Him: that’s good; now find a number on your pc.
Me: Ok I have a monitor, no PC just a monitor that I bought from dell.
Him: you are a lair!
Me: Excuse me?
Him: Look at your desktop and give me your number...
Me: Where do you want me to look?
Him: do you know what a computer is?
Me: Yes.
Him: look on top of it.

*This went on from 20 minutes with me randomly asking for supervisor and him refusing to transfer me to supervisor.*

It gets better…
Finally I get put on hold, note that I can hear him breathing the whole time, and 20 minutes later same guy answers (it was a same guy, because his name and ID number were the same and well I heard him breathing the whole time).

Him: this is supervisor.
Me: *giggling a little* Hmmm ok… well… I am trying to warranty a monitor I bought from dell; I only have a monitor, no PC.
Him: Ok, there will be a number on top of your PC…..
Me: No… No number… I only have monitor…
Him: *speaking in unknown language*
Him: Ok we will trouble shoot your monitor, what is wrong with it?
Me: When I turn it on only half of the screen shows up and other half stays blank.
Him: ok turn it on…
Me: ok… done…
Him: does a green light come on?
Me: Yes.
Him: Then monitor is not broken it is your computer.
Me: But only half of the screen shows up…
Him: It’s your PC
Me: No, I am sure it’s the monitor
Him: You are a lair
Me: Ok but I am sure it’s the monitor because I connected different monitors to this same PC and it worked fine and I also connected this monitor to multiple other computers and it only showed half of the screen
Him: If a green light comes on it is not broken good bye
Me: No good bye my friend… this monitor is broken
Him: you are a lair
Me: can I speak to your supervisor
Him: I am supervisor
Me: no you are not
Him: you are a lair
Me: why would I lie if the monitor was not broken? Why would I want to replace something that works?
Him: you like to lie
Me: What? *still kind of giggling* Ever heard of BBB or small claims court
Him: Hold on… I will talk to my supervisor.
Me: I thought you were a supervisor
Him: I never said that, you are a lair.
Me: can you please stop calling me a lair, and can I speak to your supervisor
Him: NO! He is a busy man
Me: That’s nice.
Him: Hello sir could you please give me number on top of your PC. (Yes, in the middle of conversation he started over like I was a new customer)
Me: Fine (so I made up some numbers 324923490234290)
Him: Good, finally you figured it out, wasn’t that easy.
Me: Yeah, you must excuse me, I am slow.
Him: Ok we will ship you a new monitor.
Me: uh… ok… Thank you?

Whole conversation took exactly 1 hour 40 minutes. Much of conversation that I did not write down went along the same lines almost word for word and lots of pauses. I was on hold total 50 minutes with him breathing in the phone. At least 6 times I went “um… what is going on?” and twice he went: “you are on hold sir, please be quite” and more heavy breathing.


Beat that!
Cheers

 

[Bob Lee (QSC)]

Being called a den is one thing, but I hate being called a lair …

 

[Ívar Þórólfsson]

I have a bunch of stories from when I was in helpdesk.
Lot´s of stuff that makes me wonder how some people can get through life with their apparent lack of intelligence.

1. A woman called complaining that her computer didn´t power on.
This was troubleshooted, is their light on the computer? no, is there a green light on the monitor? no. And so it went, then we tried to get the asset tag of the computer so we could look it up.
User: "the asset tag, uh, wait I can´t see it because it´s so dark in here"
Helpdesk: Dark in there? Why is that
User: "Oh, the power went out so there are no lights and I cannot see the asset tag".

2. Another time a woman called and complained that her mail didn´t work.
We did a remote takeover of her computer, tried out the mail program and everything seemed to work.
She said that she had always sent a mail and got a reply soon after. Now she hadn´t received a reply in a long time.
We troubleshoot further, after about good 10-15 minutes of troubleshooting the mail which seems to be working perfectly fine, showing her how the mail works perfectly fine she finally says: "I´m used to send a mail to this address weekly, I write the mail, put it in an envelope, stamp it and mail it, but now I haven´t received a reply for a long time"
Me: What? Are you talking about an actual letter? a.k.a. Snail mail?
Her: yes
Me: I´m sorry but that is really not the concern of the IT helpdesk.
Her: oh, ok then, bye.

3. A woman calls in complaining that her computer is a bit slow.
We do a remote takeover and she has A LOT of windows open.
We suggest that she might have to close some windows.
She: "oh, wait a sec" puts the phone down, I hear hear her walking, the sound of a actual window getting closed, more tapping of feet. "ok, the window is closed, what now?"
meh

4. A user calls up..
User: Hi, I want to order some oranges
Helpdesk: uhh, this is the IT helpdesk
User: Yes I know, I want to order some oranges
Helpdesk: Riiiight, you have to talk to catering for that.
User: Oh, thanks.

Can´t remember any good ones at the moment, but we have had them all.

 

[MJ5150]

Quite the memory, or imagination, you have there Santa.

-Mike

 

[kserg]

Quite the memory, or imagination, you have there Santa.

-Mike

Acctually i do... that transcript is very close to what has been said... Then again there is not that much to remeber


For some reason there are things that i can remeber down to a very last detail... yet i forget my age all the time...

It's only been a day too...

 

[Blackbird]

Story I heard when I started out at Radio Shack years ago:

1) Guy buys toy blackjack game.

2) Guy gets really good at the blackjack game.

3) Guy flies out to Reno to play blackjack at a casino.

4) Guy loses $600 at blackjack table in Reno.

5) Guy comes back to Radio Shack, claiming they owe him $600.

Oh, and remember the time when Motorola phones used to cost only a penny with activation? I lost count of the number of jackasses who wanted to walk out with a cell phone without a phone account (GTE Mobilnet, for those who are curious to remember)...

 

[ulrich]

I've had my share of support hell, mostly with cable, and telecom companies. I have however had some good experiences. Rane stand out as exceptional. I tried to buy three button caps for my MP24 DJ mixer, they sent five, free of charge. I'd send them S/Ns of gear I was watching on eBay, and they'd email back the items history. IE this email:

"It is a 230 Volt export model line-cord-version DC 24. In the U S this piece may be considered gray market.

And since the unit has never been officially converted to 120 VAC here at the factory it is still likely the piece is configured for overseas operation including the bi-pin line cord. This unit is one of the first versions that has both 1/4" and XLR I/O connections.

My two cents: Don't buy it (for US operation). It's been converted somewhere if it has a US power cord and who knows what that entails. Additionally the later DC 24 with external power supply (the RS 1) is quieter simply due to the transformer not being inside the chassis. "

Clear, un-scripted, helpful...shocking. Guess who's mixer I spent $700 on a couple years later. JTFC, I spent $700 on a DJ mixer, I could have bought a nice bass. Oh well it WAS the '90s.

QSC, have manuals for a lot of their old gear on their web-site, but my used USA 850 was so old that they didn't have a manual on-line, so they sent a free hard copy. Compare to Sony, who charged me $10 for a poor xerox of the manual for my A7 DAT.

 

[mkrtu9]

I'm with ya on Dell. I had a bad experiences w/ them too as I have posted the story before so I won't bother doing again. I'll never buy from them again.

 

[Ray Holt]

Well, I ordered a lot of parts from Carvin starting around Christmas time (I was building a guitar). Now first off, I was a bit disappointed because I had to call about EVERY order to make something actually happen. But the customer service is great... the last one was the best.

Him: Hi this is *whoever* how may I help you?
Me: Hi I was just curious about an order... I'm not sure exactly the date I place it but it's been at least 2 weeks and I wanted to check on it...

*give him order # and all*

Him: (quietly) hm... that's interesting....
Me: *concern*
Him: Yeah, you actually placed the order about a month ago... and we have it here... it just hasn't shipped and I'm not..quite...sure...why. I'll have it shipped to you today!
Me: Well thank you very much...

It's kind of odd. There must be something wrong with their shipping dept.. because every order took forever, but the customer service itself is phenomenal, they got me my parts in at most 2 days.