I think I'm a pathological liar

[Relic]

Really really silly question here - but have you ever tried to just stop doing it? I mean, I know it's easier said than done by a long shot but you realize that you do it and posted it here publicly, no? You really don't sound to me like someone who's pathological and beyond all control, you sound quite reasonable in fact.
It's when you DON'T realize or accept something about yourself when it's really pervasive. So if it's conscious, it's also voluntary, so just stop??

 

[wilser]

you should be a politician

 

[MIJ-VI]

I end up making stories about everything based off stories I've heard. Like if you ask me about a certain bass, I might be inclined to say I played it and liked it, when I've never even seen one in person, I've only heard about it. But I do lie a lot.

I think the only time I'm truthful is when I try to sell stuff. I can't stand to lie to someone to get their money.

Help me.

A pathological liar, or a nascent novelist..?

Have you considered creative writing as an outlet for your imagination?

 

[Kosko]

Well, I suppose they say confession is the first step of recovery. Best of luck on that journey.

Me, I'm too dumb to lie, I have hard enough time keeping facts straight, let alone lies.

 

[fryBASS]

I use to do this a lot when I was a child. Anytime someone was talking about something, say a movie that I hadn't seen, I would say that I saw it. And then the person would continue to go "Oh do you remember that part...?! It was awesome!" and I'd just be like "Yeah it was so awesome!" I guess I didn't want to deal with them saying "Oh man, you've never seen it, *** is wrong with you man?"
Sometimes I still do that with music stuff today, but I'm getting better. Y'know, someone mentions some random indie band, and I'm just like, oh yeah, I've heard of them before, when I haven't.

I feel like other people do this too. I suppose it's to gain acceptance.

But it's always better to just tell the truth!

 

[Absynthe]

I end up making stories about everything based off stories I've heard. Like if you ask me about a certain bass, I might be inclined to say I played it and liked it, when I've never even seen one in person, I've only heard about it. But I do lie a lot.

I think the only time I'm truthful is when I try to sell stuff. I can't stand to lie to someone to get their money.

Help me.

Dude...that's the first step just coming out and admitting it, now keep stepping I'd suggest telling a live breathing human being whose standing in front of you exactly what you're telling us.

I can relate very much to this and also to what Matticus brought up about "One Upers" as in I was this type of person until the last couple years. A lot of it I truly believe I picked up from my childhood being that things went on in my house that my mother never wanted to leak out...so she controlled everything I did and said and taught me how to lie like a pro...if I was crying and a relative was coming over she taught me how to giggle and put on a happy face and the excuse of oh she has allergies and the sneezies. But I will not put all the blame on her because it comes to a point when you get older and you should know better, and I choose to continue on.

Anyway...without realizing it I fibbed and embellished almost every fricken thing that ever crossed my lips...I think I continued for so long because people loved my stories and I enjoyed making them happy and hearing them laugh and gasp and blah blah blah...I'm pretty animated and can be rather charming so it was hard for people to see through me. I can read people very well, and if I started to see even one millimeter of skepticism on their face I'd chuckle place a hand on their shoulder and say something like...gosh listen to me...I just won't shut up..please tell me something about yourself, which usually put them at ease and they'd usually reply that they wanted me to continue.

This had gone on my whole life until I met my current boyfriend which was four years ago...though it took a couple years for me to shake it off. He's probably the most honest, kindest person I've ever known and it ripped and pulled at me that eventually I was incapable of lying to him about anything. I actually sat down with him and told him the things I had lied to him about...which he laughed at me in a good way. I still, very rarely, start to lie to him...sometimes I do...but then 5 mins. later I'll admit that that's not true...which again he laughs at me, says how much he loves me and I get a hug.

I apologize for the novel, but it's hard for me not to describe things thoroughly sometimes. The main thing I want you to get from this is that...you're not alone and please continue your journey to be honest with everyone. After I started being honest I felt such a heaviness lifted from me and I feel so fulfilled just being me...and what's the most fulfilling is when I get the same reactions from people now that I tried to manipulate from them before...because their reactions to me now are real because I'm being real.

The path of lies and deceit is lonely and dark with empty, blank satisfaction that turns you into a hollow bag of flesh.

 

[MatticusMania]

I use to do this a lot when I was a child. Anytime someone was talking about something, say a movie that I hadn't seen, I would say that I saw it. And then the person would continue to go "Oh do you remember that part...?! It was awesome!" and I'd just be like "Yeah it was so awesome!" I guess I didn't want to deal with them saying "Oh man, you've never seen it, *** is wrong with you man?"
Sometimes I still do that with music stuff today, but I'm getting better. Y'know, someone mentions some random indie band, and I'm just like, oh yeah, I've heard of them before, when I haven't.

I feel like other people do this too. I suppose it's to gain acceptance.

But it's always better to just tell the truth!

Most definitely. Though, the way I see it, if someone starts talking about a band I havent heard, rather then say that I have, I'll inquire about the band in question. Use moments like this to start conversations with people.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

Yesterday I tapped an asian chick in the back of my van.







EDIT: Ok I lied. She was only half asian.

 

[jonathan_matos5]

Yesterday I tapped an asian chick in the back of my van.







EDIT: Ok I lied. She was only half asian.

i thought you were gonna say it was a Sedan or SUV.

 

[Phalex]

 

[CapnSev]

Ive known people like this. I call them One Uppers. Theyre the type of person, lets say a coworker, who you relate a story to, and they respond with something like "oh, yeah, Ive done that, but it <insert similar subject matter, only better>"

Theyre often quite easy to spot, as they seemingly know everything youre telling them about, but only the points youve already mentioned. Ive always suspected that it came from some strange need for acceptance, like you'll think less of them if they dont know what youre talking about. Rather than actually being interested and asking question they play along like if they know all about it, but never have anything to actually add, unless they can reword whats already been told to them in a way that it sounds fresh.

I had a coworker like this. My friends ex-gf was the same way, only she would just completely make it up, unprovoked.

+1,000,000 to the "one upper" definition. Those people drive me insane!

 

[Joe Nerve]

I'm a little creeped out by pathological liars because I tend to believe a lot of what people say. I could never understand why people would lie except for in the obvious cases like when your woman asks if she looks fat. IMO once you're found out, which you will be, you lose all credibility. Almost as though you simply don't count anymore. Might as well not say anything. I don't know. I'm sure this doesn't help the OP any, but this is one psychological issue I really don't understand. Perhaps I'll gain some insight by plugging in here.

I teach a nightschool program for kids to basically get a HS diploma for doing nothing. Sweathog type of thing. One night a kid was going on and on, in detail, about how he was mugged, his injuries, how the the cops had him look at mug shots... bla, bla, bla... it was actually an incredibly interesting story. He had the whole class until he started some crap about the cops picking him up and waking up the neighborhood at 6AM cuz they used their sirens to have him out of the house. One of the other students called BS and the kid started squirming. Then they called the whole story BS, and he squirmed more. He finally kinda admitted he made everything up, and I heard later from other teachers that that's what the kid is all about. He just makes crap up and tells stories. A lot of wasted energy, and again - I really don't get it.

 

[sloasdaylight]

There are just some things a bunch of bassists on the internet are not qualified to give solutions for.

Yea, but we're better than /b/

 

[MatticusMania]

If only slightly...

 

[beelzelboss]

Thanks for all the help guys. Sorry I've been mia, had some time away from the internet.

Usually I would say " I'm going to go see a Prof tommorrow" but that would be a lie.
Time to call up my therapist and see if we can't work something out.

The idea of a novel has me intrigued, but I don't enjoy writing very much. I'd rather play music.

After analyzing what I say, most is it aren't lies, just stuff that I've heard about from other people. Ill just make it sound like it happened to me. I can also spit out exactly what somebody before me said, but in a fresh and new way.

On the plus side to all of this, I can bs with the best of them, and I do make good stories.

Telling g you guys didnt take that much guts actually. I'm not well known on here as I read more than I post, so I'm really anonymous on here. The only guy who knows who I am in real life would be the two guys I bought basses from.

Any more suggestions for outlets?

 

[Skitch it!]

Thanks for all the help guys. Sorry I've been mia, had some time away from the internet.

Usually I would say " I'm going to go see a Prof tommorrow" but that would be a lie.
Time to call up my therapist and see if we can't work something out.

The idea of a novel has me intrigued, but I don't enjoy writing very much. I'd rather play music.

After analyzing what I say, most is it aren't lies, just stuff that I've heard about from other people. Ill just make it sound like it happened to me. I can also spit out exactly what somebody before me said, but in a fresh and new way.

On the plus side to all of this, I can bs with the best of them, and I do make good stories.

Telling g you guys didnt take that much guts actually. I'm not well known on here as I read more than I post, so I'm really anonymous on here. The only guy who knows who I am in real life would be the two guys I bought basses from.

Any more suggestions for outlets?

More a case of 'Artistic License' than complete invention then, relating commonality through another's narrative, it's not the same as dodging the bullets with complete falsities or something as skewed as that, pathological is being a bit hard on yourself imo, entertaining stories are just that, Shakespeare messed around with the facts for years, and governments are great at it ; )

 

[beelzelboss]

More a case of 'Artistic License' than complete invention then, relating commonality through another's narrative, it's not the same as dodging the bullets with complete falsities or something as skewed as that, pathological is being a bit hard on yourself imo, entertaining stories are just that, Shakespeare messed around with the facts for years, and governments are great at it ; )

Oh. I said pathological because that was the only word I could this k of at the time that fit. I vaugely remember Learning something about artistic liscense last year in English class, but I couldn't tell you what it is.

 

[Skitch it!]

Oh. I said pathological because that was the only word I could this k of at the time that fit. I vaugely remember Learning something about artistic liscense last year in English class, but I couldn't tell you what it is.

Don't concern yourself too much, some I've come across in the past are just downright twisted and not for entertainment value, just for pure gain or to completely discredit/harm, take your time fella, just keep your awareness about you ; )

 

[beelzelboss]

Yea, I'm just trying to stop before I do it. Hopefully this will also help me with "think before you speak"

 

[Skitch it!]

Yea, I'm just trying to stop before I do it. Hopefully this will also help me with "think before you speak"

Everyone likes an entertaining story, it's no biggie ; )

A mythical one here in town was a about a local guy who walked his horse in massively deep snow and tied it outside his house to the remaining peak of a lampost, anyway, overnight there was a massive thaw and when he woke up the next morning, he looked out of his window and the poor horse was hung.

The best lately happened to my brother, he went to a local pub with his girlfriend and went up to the bar to get drinks. He met an old fella there whom started telling him about his hard life and the misfortune that he was completely blind. He asked my bro if he could spare him a drink, which he bought him, no problem. As bro turned back around to give him the beer, he caught the guy looking at his girlfriends a$$ : )