Office Drinking

[NWB]

Here's me:

"I don't drink." (or smoke, or shoot, or whatever the partiers are doing)

"Why not?"

"I don't have to explain myself. I'm about fifty times cooler than you, so stop asking me questions before I kick your ass."

Try it.

The Mellow One comes through again!

Hilarious.

 

[Mysterion]

I can't help but think of Mad Men and how they all just causally drink during office hours.

Sometime in the late-70s, I had my first (and only) full-time desk job, in an extremely conservative, finance-related office. Being 19 or so, and utterly oblivious, I dressed like the office punk, and got away with it, largely because nobody there knew what punk rock was.

Plenty of the upper-echelon execs kept a bottle in the desk drawer, and pretty much everybody drank at least a couple of beers at lunch; the exceptions being me--who found much worse things to do with the time--and one of the junior economists, who spent his lunch hours in the nearby red-light district, buying really twisted porn.

During the holidays, the execs went berserk. I remember being called into the VPs office along with the rest of the staff, and embarking on an epic whiskey-drinking binge at 10AM, along with most of the executive staff. When the whiskey ran out, I was dispatched along with the junior economist to fetch more. Sensing a good thing--and coming to work prepared--I took him down to the parking garage, where I revealed that I was holding an eight-ball of whiff, and a couple joints of primo Hawaiian.

Eventually, we made our way back to the office with the exec's liquor. Nobody noticed anything amiss, or that we were pretty plastered--they were mostly concerned with maintaining their own buzzes until they lurched out at 3PM.

It might sound like fun in retrospect, but I was glad when I left that place--it was way too straightlaced for me...