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Update on getting kicked out of my band thread...

dirtychinchilla

dirtychinchilla

Dec 23, 2007
659
670
London, UK
#1
Hi guys,

Thought I'd give you an update on this thread, Kicked out of my band

I eventually got back in touch with the guys. The guitarist I'd been speaking to anyway, but the drummer I had cut off all communication with. But he was my friend, so I ended up speaking to him to see how him and his family were doing.

What resulted was them apologising and us getting back together for one more practice. That was actually really fun and it went well. Everything looked rosy.

But the guitarist, who was made redundant due to COVID, got a new job. It appears to be a pyramid scheme and he's working 6 days a week, 11 AM til maybe 9 PM. The one day he would be free is a Sunday, and the drummer does 12 hour shifts on Saturday and Sunday and has a family. Consequently, zero practice opportunities.

2 days ago I asked the guitarist if he could finish a little early once every few weeks to enable us to practice. In short, it took him 2 days to reply and he said no. The drummer basically then said, I'll be here if the band ever goes ahead, but I'm not going to wait around. I echoed his sentiment and have posted an ad online to find a new band.

So, band over, no more heartache, we can move forward with our lives. In hindsight, the guitarist is great and I hope our friendship continues, but he just isn't band material. This time his excuse was work, but he's had an excuse every single time. Loads of red flags...

Anyway, onwards and upwards. I'm hoping I'll find some other guys to play with and we can make something good of it.

Case closed, hopefully :)
 
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#4
WI Short Scaler said:
If I'm reading this write it all ended in a friendly manner which is always better. I know from my own experience you never know how other musicians will come in and out of your life so always better when bridges aren't burned beyond repair.
Click to expand...

Honestly, I'm not sure how things are/will be with the guitarist, but I've come out of this with a better relationship with the drummer. I'm not great at locking in, and when I spoke to him earlier he was suggesting we meet up to work on that, so good. I think we'd all be better friends without the band in the middle of it. If we all want to meet up at some point to relive some history, we can do.
 
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#6
Talk with the guitarst, and find out exactly what he wants. If he's not on the same page, then fire him, and anyone in the band that doesn't share those same aspirations. They will inevitably only hold you back. If the producer is really a grammy winner, there will be things to prove it. If he doesn't have them, then run.

My brother went out and hired a publicist to help spin his debut CD. Doing that got some air play on classic rock stations as far away as Los Angeles, a ton of press good press from more than a few sites, one of which was Guitar World, and it led to gigs opening for Tesla and Firehouse. He knows people in the industry so that also didn't hurt, but if he didn't he would have also shopped around for a reputable manger to help him break into that circuit as an opening act.
 
#9
He quit the pyramid scheme last week! The band still lives.

In other news I'm playing with a cover band tonight. That should be fun.

I am considering trying out for another originals band too. I think they might be a little above my skill level. I'm going to have a go at their music tomorrow when the cover band thing is out of the way and then let them know whether or not I think I can do it.
 
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#10
dirtychinchilla said:
He quit the pyramid scheme last week! The band still lives.

In other news I'm playing with a cover band tonight. That should be fun.

I am considering trying out for another originals band too. I think they might be a little above my skill level. I'm going to have a go at their music tomorrow when the cover band thing is out of the way and then let them know whether or not I think I can do it.
Click to expand...
I used to feel contempt for people that allowed themselves to get sucked into those schemes. Then I finally grew up and realized that they target desperate people. I never knew anyone that got involved in that nonsense that wouldn't have made more money working a minimum wage job than they did pestering their friends to buy their overpriced crap.
 
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#11
I was about to say that it sounds like you and the drummer need another guitar player. My question is does this guitar player really want you or either of you.

If musically you go work at a pyramid deal, I don't think you are that "musical" in the grand scheme. Sounds like a big hobby - which is cool. But all the musicians that are pro that I know do any and everything musical. Lessons, cover bands, originals, solo gigs, fill ins, you name it.

They don't bail on their original "become famous" gig...
 
#12
Aceman said:
I was about to say that it sounds like you and the drummer need another guitar player. My question is does this guitar player really want you or either of you.

If musically you go work at a pyramid deal, I don't think you are that "musical" in the grand scheme. Sounds like a big hobby - which is cool. But all the musicians that are pro that I know do any and everything musical. Lessons, cover bands, originals, solo gigs, fill ins, you name it.

They don't bail on their original "become famous" gig...
Click to expand...

Well that may be true, but the guitarist pretty much writes all the music so we would very much be adrift without him. As you say, it is a hobby. I was taking it way to seriously before, I think, so now I feel like it's a hobby I think I'll be much happier with it.

I played with this cover band last night. They were amateur...but I feel fine with that. It's 10 minutes drive from my house, nice and relaxed, and I like the songs. I kept having to tell the guitarist to turn it up as the band didn't have the ear splitting volume - and consequently the feel - that I'm used to. A couple of them said I'm the loudest bassist they've ever played with...I'm used to be told to turn it up!

The singing was quite amateur, guitar was alright and the drummer was on point - probably above my level.

This other originals band has sent me their material and it seems very difficult...got to work out what to do with that!
 
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