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Why do some people think...

soulgeezer

Inactive
Jan 29, 2007
5,123
2
Northern New Jersey
www.myspace.com
Disclosures
Endorsing Artist: Red Zone Effects
...that it'll make you feel better, knowing that someone else is worse off than you are?

For example, as a result of the nor'easter last night, we experienced significant water in our apartment. About an inch of water covered the floor and everything my wife and I own is now perched atop our bed. We can't sleep there, so we're staying with my mom until things dry out.

My mom has repeatedly been telling me to look at the TV and think about how good we have it, compared to the people who need boats to get out of their houses. My answer to her is, "How is knowing that they've got it bad supposed to make me feel any better? Whether they've got it bad or not, *this* (meaning our situation) still sucks."

Is she taking joy in other people's tragedy, counting her blessings, or just being freakin' annoying? (I opt for the last, as I've told her 100 times that she's not helping by continually repeating her mantra, "But look how bad *they've* got it!")

I just don't get it -- How does the fact that somebody else has it worse make my situation any better?
 
I hate this, too. Last year I had to have minor surgery done, but it was my first time under the knife, and I was pretty freaking scared. My mom, however, said "Don't complain about it. Think about how scared the people are who have to get heart transplants!"

Okay, that's all well and good. Doesn't change the fact that I was still scared stiff. :hmm:

Honestly, I see it as belittling your problems when people make these comparisons. It's like saying "Your problems aren't important. Suck it up and deal with it."
 
Sorry to hear you took on water. That sucks and others are worse but still...
I think your Mom is trying to make you feel better by looking on the bright side.
HUGS man. :)
 
It's more of a perspective thing. Let's face it, an inch of water in your apartment is an inconvenience compared to leaving your home by boat.


Does it make your situation any better? No, of course not. Was she trying to be annoying, probably not, but that's what mother do from time to time. It must have seem especially annoying as it was probably the one person you expected a little sympathy from. Moms will never stop trying to teach their youngins.
 
You're coming very close to breaking the 'No Whining' man law Geezer. ;)

And besides it COULD be worse. You could have soap up your peehole. Think of all the people out there that have soap up their peehole. Or what about the poor sods that crapped and missed the bowl? Think about all the revolting wretches and gagging they have to go through to pick it up for the assist. Or what if you're apartment started leaking when you're having an triple bypass heart surgery? What if your surgeon cupped a fart on your face when you were out? Or what if you accidently hit the 'girl' button on a japanese bidet and you get a nice needle point water jet in that sensitive spot right below your teabag? What if you had tapeworm? That would be worse. Or a hot sister that your buddies keep hooking up with that then telling you all the juicy details? Hell what if everytime you closed your eyes in the most blissful moment right before sleeping, someone swatted you in the face with a sweaty jockstrap? That would be worse right? So quit your whining Geezer, and look on the bright side of life.... <<insert the whistle from Monty Python's 'Life of Brian' closing theme song here>>:hiding:
 
You're coming very close to breaking the 'No Whining' man law Geezer. ;)

And besides it COULD be worse. You could have soap up your peehole. Think of all the people out there that have soap up their peehole. Or what about the poor sods that crapped and missed the bowl? Think about all the revolting wretches and gagging they have to go through to pick it up for the assist. Or what if you're apartment started leaking when you're having an triple bypass heart surgery? What if your surgeon cupped a fart on your face when you were out? Or what if you accidently hit the 'girl' button on a japanese bidet and you get a nice needle point water jet in that sensitive spot right below your teabag? What if you had tapeworm? That would be worse. Or a hot sister that your buddies keep hooking up with that then telling you all the juicy details? Hell what if everytime you closed your eyes in the most blissful moment right before sleeping, someone swatted you in the face with a sweaty jockstrap? That would be worse right? So quit your whining Geezer, and look on the bright side of life.... <<insert the whistle from Monty Python's 'Life of Brian' closing theme song here>>:hiding:

Good to have you back man. :D
 
It's more of a perspective thing. Let's face it, an inch of water in your apartment is an inconvenience compared to leaving your home by boat.


Does it make your situation any better? No, of course not. Was she trying to be annoying, probably not, but that's what mother do from time to time. It must have seem especially annoying as it was probably the one person you expected a little sympathy from. Moms will never stop trying to teach their youngins.

Chunk, I think you nailed it -

My mom's way of looking at life was formed during the depression and WWII. She grew up seeing the poverty of many in NY (including her family's own) and the destruction in Europe. Through it all, her parent's taught her that as bad as she might have it, there were many people that had it worse than she did. Clearly, mom took this lesson to heart and is now repeating it to me.

My only real problem with her saying it is that she repeats it over and over, even after I've asked her not to. However, your statement that moms will be "annoying from time to time" is a classic understatement in *my* mom's case -- Believe when I tell you that she always has the answer, whether you asked a question or not, and she will repeatedly tell you exactly what you should do, whether you wanted her advice or not.

Ever seen "Everybody Loves Raymond"? My mom isn't named Marie for nothing!

Believe me, I wasn't looking for sympathy from her or anybody else -- I just wanted her to stop with all the Goody Two Shoes crap and let me get back to bailing out the house.

Don't get me wrong -- I love my mom. But, sometimes, she's a major pain in the ass!


Oh, and kserg...

kserg said:
"no matter what someone else created worse thread then this"

"In Soviet Russia, Mom eats you!"


And, Maki's back in town! Good to have you back, buddy!
 
As has been said, it's a matter of attempting to gain perspective.

For me, if I take a moment and realize how sh***y some people in this world have it--and are dealing with it--I start thinking maybe I can deal with my own, comparatively, minor problems.

For the record, my wife and I have been all but wiped out three times--fires, floods, moving van wrecks--so it's not that I don't sympathize.

Doc
 
Chunk, I think you nailed it -



My only real problem with her saying it is that she repeats it over and over, even after I've asked her not to. However, your statement that moms will be "annoying from time to time" is a classic understatement in *my* mom's case -- Believe when I tell you that she always has the answer, whether you asked a question or not, and she will repeatedly tell you exactly what you should do, whether you wanted her advice or not.

Ever seen "Everybody Loves Raymond"? My mom isn't named Marie for nothing!

Believe me, I wasn't looking for sympathy from her or anybody else -- I just wanted her to stop with all the Goody Two Shoes crap and let me get back to bailing out the house.

Don't get me wrong -- I love my mom. But, sometimes, she's a major pain in the ass!
:D
Understood, and kudos to you then. I would have gone to a motel,....or under a bridge :D
 
Good to be back fellas.

Geezer, FWIW, my mom is the same way. Try dragging her through Japan for two weeks. Oh wait, that's another one of those it could be worse scenarios isn't it. Just tell your my to shut the hell up, quit her belly-aching, and go cook you some food... (but only after you've prearranged a motel for you and lady) See how that flies and then report back to us... :ninja: :hiding: