"your rig or the gig is cancelled"

[Arthur U. Poon]

I respect that the OP stood their ground.

I have had to (or been forced to) let other bassists play my bass (Modulus Q4 or Spector NS4CRFM at that time), or through my amp (Crest CA9, Demeter preamp, Aguilar GS112 cabs) or both, back when the band I played in hosted a weekly Sunday Night Jam at a local bar.

Other times, friends/ex-bandmates of the bandleader would show up and ask to sit in on a few songs and play my bass. I normally obliged, but a couple of times the people that wanted to use my gear were drunk. This made me reluctant to hand my bass over. When I tried to politely refuse, the bandleader got pissed at me and said then I shouldn't bring nice gear to our gigs. I explained I really didn't have any gear that wasn't nice!

I was really depending on the gig money to make ends meet in those days, so I started bringing my mildly worn MIA P-Bass as my backup, and I would take my Aggie cabs off the stage on the Jam Night and plug my rack into my hammered Ampeg 4-10.

Luckily I've landed a job that makes end meet and I don't have to gig unless I want to. I now have no problems whatsoever saying "No" when it comes to someone asking to use my gear.

 

[pcake]

imo the op did the right thing. a gig where you risk your gear doesn't sound like it's worth playing. i mean, 4 other bands - really? and we're talking about 4 bass players who don't think it's worth bringing their own gear to a show.

we used to practice at amp rehearsal, but sometimes we'd try other studios. two of them said they had backlines for us to use, and it turned out to be bass rigs that actually belonged to other players who practiced at the studios. once i blew a speaker, and then discovered it was not only NOT the studio's gear, but it belonged to a guy i knew and even played on the same bill with. needless to say, i paid to get it fixed, but had he needed it himself in the next few days, he'd have been screwed. at the other place, i left the gear fine but heard that someone else toasted the head just a few days later.

 

[nostatic]

I've done house band duty on "pro jam" nights. As such, if a bassist shows up and signs up, they would use my rig. I don't have a problem with that, but it is part of the gig. I did have guys show up and want to also use my bass to sit in. The answer there was always, "nope." An amp is a commodity item - I can replace it. My basses are personal. I have let friends who I knew sit in and use my bass but no strangers.

 

[Korladis]

I dunno, my amp and bass are about equally irreplaceable. Well, depends on the bass.

 

[Brad Johnson]

I've done open mic house band duty and expected people to use my rig. But since my rig is typically going to be worth far more than the $100 or so that a gig like that pays, I make it clear that in the event someone damages my stuff, the leader will be responsible. He can pay for the repair with all of the money he didn't have to pay for backline every time I did the gig. So far no problems. I haven't done a gig like that in a while.

One of my favorite things is ultimatums. Particularly like the one the OP got. Friends don't give friends ultimatums like that. If it were me I'd tell them sure, they can use my gear and here's how much I'll need in advance of the show. In cash of course... cash don't bounce. They can either think I'm a tool for charging them or think I'm a tool for not letting them use my gear, I don't care... I'll still be the tool with peace of mind.

I've had promoters assume that I'll let people use my gear. Bad move. I even had one multi group show where I found out I was the only bassist who was told to bring his rig. Made an extra $200 that night.

This crap is typically just someone trying to get over. So go ahead... try me.

 

[Rocker47]

I agree with the op 100%. It is your gear and you earned the money to purchase it. We do gigs with "friends" and each time we take turns bringing cabs, but we ALWAYS bring our own heads. It was started years ago and we've never had an issue. Maybe a lucky string of people to deal with? Who knows, but it works.