!0 Ways to Drive Guitar Players Crazy

[nojj]

1/ Use a whammy bar better than they

2/Consistently use drop D tuning so they can't cheat off your hand position

3/ Use a fancy rack/floor preamp with nicer sounding distortion and/or FX

4/ mimic all their leads, you can do it better, anyway

5/ Use a Pitch Transposer or Piccollo bass.

6/ constantly remind the guitarist that it takes them 6 strings to do what you can do with 4
{may not work if the guitarist can count past 4 and you have a 5 or 6 string}

7/use an 8 string bass

8/ keep telling them they're out of tune, they usually are.

9/ learn the acrobatics and finger tricks, and do them better

10/have the biggest......floor controller

If you as a bassist do these things correctly, you may achieve the ultimate accolade: The guitarist may get p*ssed off and walk off the stage in midset, leaving you to finish.

If they keep mouthing off, just put some sheet music in front of them, that usually shuts 'em up......

 

[jaywa]

Good stuff. Thanks for sharing. I've actually messed up a few guitarists in my time (unintentionally) using #2.

Maybe I'll try a couple of the other ones this weekend...

 

[Salamenster]

Ah, no 8#...

So funny, yet so often true as well!

 

[pklima]

That sounds like a lot of work. Here's a much easier 3-step plan:

1. Sing
2. Sing "I'm Too Sexy"
3. Really be too sexy

 

[lowfreq33]

Sounds like you're a lot of fun to play with...

 

[SoVeryTired]

As a guitar player (as well as bassist), I'd just be confused as to why you were doing all these things. But you'd be kicked out of the band long before it drove me crazy.

 

[JEDI BASS]

Sounds like you're a lot of fun to play with...

+1 but then again, sounds like he'd rather be on stage alone.... yawn

 

[nojj]

Content provided for entertainment purposes only.
Bassbarian Enterprises will accept no responsibility for bassists being fired by using any of the above 10 Ways to Drive Guitar Players Crazy
OFFICIAL DISCLAIMER: No guitar players were harmed while writing the original post.

 

[nortonrider]

Content provided for entertainment purposes only.

It sucks that such a disclaimer is necessary.

It does seem like the "High and Mighty" are out in force looking
to find something they can belittle to make themselves feel better.

It's humor people, get a grip!

 

[NOAH_FX]

How dare you tell a joke in Bass Humour!

If you did that in MY band, I’d kick you out so fast you'd think it was yesterday.. Than I’d walk somewhere, up-hill the whole time... While carrying a bull calf and smoking unfiltered cigarettes.

 

[simenandreas]

I know a good one; max your amps volume and bass eq!

 

[superbassman2000]

I find that I can drive guitars players crazy by casually mentioning that their amp doesn't sound as good as last time.

Another thing that'll drive them up the wall is to introduce them to people as *your* guitar player

 

[nojj]

I find that I can drive guitars players crazy by casually mentioning that their amp doesn't sound as good as last time.

Another thing that'll drive them up the wall is to introduce them to people as *your* guitar player

+1

Or say "Why are you using *that* amp?"

 

[JBNeedsBeer]

I have a nice habit of staying in standard when my guitarrist plays in drop d (I don't always need the low d). Confuses the hell out of him

 

[rodl2005]

I thought just telling em to turn down did it?

 

[Febs]

It does seem like the "High and Mighty" are out in force looking
to find something they can belittle to make themselves feel better.

Isn't that exactly what the OP is doing?

 

[nojj]

I feel just fine, thank you for asking.

For the humor-impaired, it's a bass joke thread, posted in the bass humor section of a bass site.

 

[yodedude2]

For the humor-impaired, it's a bass joke thread, posted in the bass humor section of a bass site.

I don't get it.














Just kidding!

 

[MrMeacham]

My gear is big the guitarist...... wrong thread

 

[pklima]

Dunno if this thread can still be saved, but I'll try. Here are a few:


1. Act really impressed by the guitarist's amp not because it sounds good or it cost a lot, but just because it takes so much dedication to use an amp when you could just run an amp sim on a laptop and plug that into the PA.

2. Refer to any of the following as "classic rock": Sex Pistols, Nickelback, Nirvana, Green Day, Korn, Fall Out Boy, Leonard Cohen, Louis Armstrong, Michael Jackson, Jessie J.

3. Ask the guitarist to play the accordion part from "Ai se eu te pego" because it's so much more important to the song than the guitar part.

4. Say you've never heard of a rock band, but you've heard about them because they were sampled by a rapper or their singer did a non-rock track with somebody. I've done this in real life with Electric Wizard ("Oh, I've heard of them because Trae sampled them, I'll have to send you that track!") and Within Temptation ("I've never heard them but I've heard of them because their singer did that song with Armin van Buuren that was popular.") And the best part is I wasn't lying in either case.