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A few cable questions

I want to run an XLR female cable from my bass effects processor into the 1/8" microphone slot on my computer's sound card.

Can anyone give me a cable recommendation (preferably, one that does not require some extra adapter)?

Also, how will the 1/8" connection react to my source signal (electric bass) in regards to whether or not the 1/8" connection is mono or stereo?

Thanks to anyone that can help.