I don't know you're asking a pretty biased group about what sounds good! I think you've got to make some compromises when you are playing with others, if they don't like the way it's sounding maybe there's something to be said for taking some input.
I too am an aggressive finger style player and found that my FOH sounds wasn't translating well to my style. Not having all the advantages of eq and dynamics that I would have through an amp. My compromise was to start using flatwound Chromes, they allow me to play in my style without the extra fret noise and they do get pretty grindy sounding. It made a world of difference to me and my tone sits in the mix much better than it used to.
FWIW I think your tone is righteous, I'm just saying your bandmates aren't geeky bass players. But if you playing Rush covers they should understand where you are coming from too...